College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

PERMANENT LOVERS

LOVERS WILL BE TOGETHER PERMANENTLY

5-5-20-END IN CONCRETE FACES

Interpreted for a friend

The beginning is there’s a lot of turmoil in a community group – there’s like a ‘big man leader’ off to the right, in the middle a group of ‘boys’ or ‘young men.’

I am here in the middle, doing this & that, like on the media, speaking. There’s a TV or radio show. This man I didn’t think was promoting me, I see his show in retrospect, & he did promote me, so much later I thank him for it. There’s something pitiful about this man, he has a good heart but he’s struggling or something.

There’s this guy I love who is in front in a sort of restaurant area with small booths—he has the young guys all around him, he’s one of them.

One day after a while he’s in a booth, & he & I have been through a lot, & I think it’s time for me to SIT DOWN & TALK TO HIM. I think he’s READY. So I go sit down in the little booth across from him ready for a good important CHAT.

*(CHAT IN BOOTH: This is when Frank was running like a kid with all the guys – totally immature – while we were dating & I wanted to pin him down to a relationship.

IN A BOOTH: This is like being ‘fenced in’, a limited space, closed in to some degree, a symbol for a RELATIONSHIP.)*

He FLIES OFF like a wild animal, totally scared or spooked out, with all the boys around him flying with him. They’re all dependent on each other – like a HERD, & where one goes, they all go. They can’t be or think independently, all dependent on the herd.

(FLIES OFF LIKE WILD ANIMAL with the other guys: Herd mentality is powerful.)

Later I hide behind a staircase where he will re-emerge, I hope to ambush him to see what is he doing & have a discussion.

*(BEHIND A STAIRCASE, AMBUSH: Long wait for him to come down from his ‘Ivory Tower’ {implied, he is high up, I could say Ivory Tower although it is not shown} but it doesn’t happen for years.

IVORY TOWER: a place or situation remote from worldly or practical affairs — an attitude of aloofness from or disdain or disregard for worldly or practical affairs.

AMBUSH, HIDE BEHIND STAIRS TO CHECK ON HIM: Me leaving him, hiding from him, but still interested. Still, the relationship doesn’t happen, it doesn’t work.)*

Somehow this should work but it doesn’t.

Years go by. During that time of turmoil, this guy was with a female who he said was chasing him that he wanted to avoid—he acted like he didn’t like or love her, like she wasn’t important to him.

*(FEMALE NOT IMPORTANT TO HIM CHASING HIM: This is me – he wanted to give people the impression he wasn’t interested in me, that it was only I interested in him – but of course that was only the outside impression, he was equally interested in me, he just didn’t want a commitment—a marriage. He wanted to remain a child.

YEARS GO BY: Years have gone by & I don’t know how much more time remains before our relationship starts.)*

Now I see him unexpectedly & I see her face to the left back of me & his face to the right front of me by the corner of is it a brick building? It seems like five or more years after the fiasco.

Their faces are like none I have ever seen before. Each one is encased in cement – their faces come out of the cement, made of cement, surrounded by a rectangle square horizontally, with decorations of sorts around their faces. It’s mostly grey but there are bits & pieces of color here & there.

*(FACES ENCASED IN HORIZONTALLY RECTANGULAR CEMENT: It is ‘set in stone’ that we get back together.

CORNER BRICK BUILDING: Solid brick – also represents the relationship, as we are there. We were ‘crucified’ {the corner} but it stands strong.

‘Sense-image material’ is yesterday I saw a homestead family in the middle of a beautiful dry wilderness. A teenage boy in the family wanted pizza & he & an older brother decide to create a PIZZA OVEN {outside} – which they do with rocks & CEMENT—the boy exclaims the cement looks like dough. They build the oven, the boy kneads the dough, covers it with tomato sauce & shredded cheese, they cook it & the whole family eats it. I was impressed by the ingenuity.

Here the cement that glued together the oven is seen as being mortar / glue to create a relationship – the boy who ran from me like a wild animal with his herd, to the boy who is now united to me in a rock solid relationship.

HORIZONTAL: This is to show me that this is of the earth, not merely spiritual, as we have the spiritual marriage already as of 2019. )*

To me it’s totally disappointing that he ended up with her – this cement like says ‘made in stone’ even though they did not get along, he was running from her, but here they are – the same two, so PREDICTABLE – them being together. I find their pairing up to be just so prosaic, so ordinary, all the problems & disclaimers to the contrary – they started out together having problems but ended up together as an ordinary couple, a predictable pairing.

*(ORDINARY, PROSAIC, PREDICTABLE: Why these words to something I suffered so much for, prayed so hard for & desired totally? I ask of Mother God:

She: Because you are so over it, having been through all that. Your emotions have been spent, drained, your mind plateau-d out, you’ve been through so much you simply cannot take any more.

It could be the emotionally desired now becomes the commonplace & ordinary, & could be ‘taken for granted’ – which would be a sigh of relief from all the previous pain.

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

HELP 4 SOULS & LOVER KISSES

SOULS SEEK MY HELP & ECSTATIC REUNION WITH MY LOVER

4-21-20-SOULS & ECSTASY WITH LOVER

Two themes, begins one way, segues into another.

First, I’m here in my house three or more floors up – like in a tower. I look below & see a few people. The idea is that people are showing up to see me in an honorable way – I am some type of respected leader.

(TOWER: Isolated height, like Jesus on the Cross. My past martyrdoms give me a spiritual height, which others can access by their respect & humility—such people are gathering below.)

I see one of the people below looks like a ‘small saint.’ A female is wearing a long black dress, but not dreary, it’s decorated with a medieval standout collar, white & gold, & has a 6” or so fringe on the bottom with similar colors—might have lace. She’s waiting for me.

*(LITTLE FEMALE ‘SAINT’: This is a female, either living or dead. If dead, the black dress says ‘funeral,’ but it also has white on the

BIG COLLAR: & hem & gold. This could show being a ‘religious’ & that she loved God {gold is love}.

If she is alive, then she’s a relationship I had LONG AGO – the black dress would be ‘ending.’ But she is here ‘below me’ spiritually asking for help. I descend to her level – not in a negative sense, but in the sense that God lowered Herself to become Jesus or another Great Saint – descended into the flesh to help us, save us from our sins. I wonder if this person could be a next-of-kin female who has not spoken to me for 41 years {due to stupid family politics.}?)*

As I look down I don’t have to go on any stairs, I can do my usual trick of jumping from great heights (I love doing this in dreams, sometimes just for fun, appear on super tall buildings & jump to enjoy floating down & showing everyone what I can do) & not getting hurt. So I jump gleefully, saying to the people & even stopping before I hit the ground, floating in the air,

“See – I don’t get hurt!”

(I DON’T GET HURT: Might be a clue this is about forgiveness, as when you forgive you say to the person ‘It’s as if you never hurt me—I remove it, I do not feel the pain.’ This is total forgiveness, & so this might be a clue it is the relative who rejected me for so long.)

Then I ask the lady if she’s a ‘little saint’ & don’t know what she says. Around me have gathered a few ‘disciples’ for want of a better word – they are cautious to show respect & don’t come too close or familiar.

Then from the left comes a black man with a narrow face – he is pitiful looking – I have seen him before. He’s wearing white clothes printed with small designs, mostly blue. The material of the clothes looks puffy & slit up & down the arms – again looks medieval, as in ancient paintings. He comes toward me cautiously, afraid I’ll reject him, but I do not, however repulsive he is. Somehow I greet him & accept him but don’t give him the hug he’d like to get. I am sitting during these communications, in my driveway, like ‘holding court.’

*(REPULSIVE MAN, CAUTIOUSLY APPROACHES, I DO NOT REJECT HIM BUT HE DOESN’T GET THE HUG HE’D LIKE: Again, don’t know if this is a Soul in Purgatory or a living person. If it’s a Soul then

THE HUG: Could be my touching him, the Sacred Touch by which he ascends into Heaven. I have had this happen when I hugged my friend George’s late wife – when she withdrew she was wearing my sweater {my Light} by which she ASCENDED into Heaven.

And when angels brought James Brown {the singer} to me, I had to kiss him with the Sacred Kiss, then the angels withdrew him into Heaven. And so, my TOUCH or CONTACT WITH ME {like the touch of Jesus garment by the woman with the issue of blood, who was thereby healed} transmits God’s Grace into a person, by which they ASCEND. Apparently, this man is not yet ready for the Sacred Touch, he has more cleansing coming up.

If this is a living person, then it might be John the lawyer – a best friend who turned on me for something I didn’t do – & has hardly spoken to me over ten years. This is saying he’d like to be forgiven. I do forgive him but according to this am not ready to give him the physical closeness he would like. He has become repulsive to me due to judging & punishing me so harshly. But then this might not be about him, might be someone else I have forgotten.)*

PEOPLE WAITING, DISCIPLES, I AM HOLDING COURT: These are people who need my help in the spiritual sense. I don’t know if they’re living or dead but they are from the ‘long past.’

MEDIEVAL CLOTHES: Long past, either living people I’ve known or Souls that have been in Purgatory a long time.

{Because of this dream I started saying the Holy Mass again, which I neglected over a month. I thought these might be Souls in Purgatory asking for help.})*

DIFFERENT SCENES OR DREAMS

Then there’s a scene of a few women in a room. One female to the right is sitting in a corner, she’s pretty, her skin seems brown although she’s Caucasian. My late husband Richard is standing near her, she’s smiling, flirting with him. This annoys me. I tell him,

(BROWN SKIN: Can mean different things. Here it means ‘in the flesh’— not spiritual.)

“She doesn’t love you – she’s making a fool out of you.”

But he has a stupid look on his face & keeps talking to her, not even seeing me. There’s another woman to my left facing me, his right that seems to be part of this.

*(RICHARD, LATE HUSBAND: This is always the present spiritual husband who I call Jack. Richard was good & loved me truly. When he appears it means my present husband has good feelings & thoughts about me, he is behaving like the good husband. {He has not appeared as evil or demonic for many months now, thank Heavens.}

A woman he’s talking to is not sincere, but messing with him. She is ‘of human nature’. It might be his housemate or it could be someone else. If it’s his housemate this is showing me she has fallen OUT of love with him as one time, she was, I think in love, in her own way. I am warning him this female no longer loves him. Now that I meditate on this I believe the smile gives it away – the smile is fake & looks like that of his housemate – but he doesn’t realize she’s faking. {Like most men, you smile, you put on an act, they fall for it— why? Because they want to. Ditto the other way. The gigolo acts like he loves you, you pay him, you think he has feelings for you.} Why she’s putting on this act is now shown. The only hint might be the

OTHER FEMALE IN ROOM: Friend might be advising her to put on an act that she still loves him to offset any repercussions—men do get violent when you reject them, even when they are the guilty party. {My first husband began to strangle me when I was leaving him on two different occasions. God saved me from it. I ran away the second time, left him, too our child & stayed at a motel.}

Hint as to why her love has gone: She lost her job, he didn’t. She was supporting them, now she needs him to put forth his money but he won’t—he needs it for substances. She’s not innocent here, she’s also an addict. You can see where love could turn to hate. {It’s that old situation where two love one another with conditions, conditions deteriorate, they end up hating one another, being bitter, even killing one another. But in true love it never dies, it’s unconditional. That’s what my lover & I have.})*

My lover Jack has been around. Suddenly he’s in my arms – it’s a reunion of love / intimacy. I can’t recall how, it just happened. He looks like himself.

(LOVER JACK: Richard is now Jack. Perhaps my mystical warning about the housemate got through to him. He sees she no longer loves him,–understandably– he turns his mind & emotions toward me & intimacy.)

He’s in my arms & we’re French kissing & it gets so intimate & erotic, I feel ecstasy.

*(ECSTASY, INTIMACY, FRENCH KISSING: This is what we both lived for & still do. There is nothing to replace this sort of emotion people feel toward another—such pleasure—it lifts you above the world & makes life meaningful. People do all sorts of illogical, criminal, extreme actions to keep feelings of ecstasy going. I know a woman who lives under a bridge with the man she loves—she’s young & pretty. She has a child every year with him which social services takes away–all for that feeling of ‘ecstasy.’

For me, I allowed him to treat me like shit in order to feel the ecstasies once in a while. He would engage me with sex – feel the pleasure – then walk away abruptly & not summon me for 5 weeks—that was his pattern. In the last two years he would praise his housemate on social media but of course I did not exist – People thought I was that forgotten, obsessed old lady. He never appeared in public with me any more because he feared losing the support of the housemate.

He talked ‘double talk’ with me, every time seeing me he’d say he was through with her, but then would add ‘don’t mess up what I have with her.’ He didn’t explain what ‘he had with her’ but I figured it out by seeing his lifelong pattern: Mooch off someone, keep my money for myself for the medications {which he desperately needs.}

This ECSTASY is similar to the highest drug. It’s the feeling saints live for when they have ecstasy/union/intimacy with God. Saints will go through any torture to feel this Love of God – It not only is spiritual, it’s emotional & physical, it lifts one to the Heavens. Of course, the earthly ecstasies FALL SHORT of the ones with God – you cannot see God face to face with an increase of feel-good hormones, serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin & endorphins. The spiritual ecstasy is beyond the earth & flesh; you leave the flesh in spiritual flights & appear in a Higher World – temporarily or forever. I cannot explain why or how the Spiritual Highs go beyond feel-good hormones, perhaps because logically hormones no longer exist past the flesh, but Spiritual Heights – Heaven, do exist.

This ECSTASY that we are both in is the Union that Jack & I have – it’s in our souls as well as our bodies. This dream indicates that Jack is now awake that his housemate/relationship is over – she no longer loves him as he never loved her – & now he’s mentally/emotionally free for the intimacy with me. {Remember, God is a ‘jealous God,’ – when you give yourself fully to something, someone, besides Her, She will not reveal herself or give you the ecstatic intimacy with Her – So in a sense, it is on the earthly plane. If Jack was divided – saw a reason to be praising Housemate all the time, & putting effort into their relationship, his mind, body, heart & soul were not free to be enjoying intimate union with me—HE’S NOW FREE.})*

Then after that he carries me around with my legs around his waist – without any strain – like you would a child without effort. And he isn’t ashamed at all to show the world he’s in love with me – he walks openly here & there where people can see.

*(CARRIES ME, MY LEGS AROUND HIS WAIST, EFFORTLESSLY LIKE A CHILD: ‘To carry’ someone is to support them, to help them get around, get somewhere. My legs around him are full support – nothing held back from him to me, he gives me his all, I don’t even have to make an effort.

ISN’T ASHAMED TO SHOW THE WORLD: This reveals he’s gotten over the fear of criticism or disapproval – he said he was with his Housemate for ‘the party life style & popularity – I sold my soul to the devil for it’ he said on social media {he said this in a veiled way, in a poem, did not name names but I understood}.)*

We talk about setting up a sports center at my house, for wrestling or sports fighting. I will set up a ‘ring’ I tell him,

“But it has to have a roof in case of rain.”

He continues to walk with me around him here & there in this place like a village, with small business places scattered about, like tiny restaurants. I tell him,

“You can have anything you want,”

(Meaning to eat, I will pay.)

He walks into this small store – all it sells is candy. There was another customer here {female}, just leaving. The place could only hold at most 5 people in front of the counter.

(CANDY STORE: Place of drugs/medications. I surmise the female just leaving is his housemate. This hints they are no longer together—she gets her drugs solo, it’s not a joint project any more. She gets her drugs, leaves, he is holding or carrying me, means he is with me, loves me, & I help him.)

On the counter left is a bowl filled with all colors candy the size of large vitamin capsules, & on the right a bowl of a strange blue sweet that looks like a smooth ocean wave, like taffy but not sticky, about ¾ inch thick, about 6” long in a wave, about 4.5” wide. I imagine you break pieces off. I tell him,

“You can have this but I don’t eat candy.”

*(CANDY, TINY STORE, SOME LIKE VITAMINS, SOME LIKE BLUE TAFFY (but not sticky): I get the feeling this represents substances, but which ones I can’t tell. I don’t do substances I say, but I tell him he can have them. Substances are his self medication due to damage by parents, he suffers from PTSD & attachment disorder, possibly other problems I’m not aware of. He would be desperate & suicidal without them – I want to help him through prayer, therapy & all the mental, emotional, spiritual remedies, medications would be temporary.

MANY BRIGHT COLORS THE SIZE OF VITAMIN CAPSULES: These drugs mimic the feel-good hormones, serotonin, dopamine, oxytocin & endorphins, or in other words, feel-good hormones. Bright colors indicate FEELINGS. Vitamins mean ‘good for you’ & these drugs mimic ‘feel good’ or ‘good for you’ feelings.)*

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

I SEE MY LOVER’S GOD SELF

I SEE MY LOVER’S GOD SELF & HE MINE—

WE WERE TOGETHER IN A PREVIOUS LIFETIME—

4-9-20-SEVEN FOOT TALL MAN CHOOSES ME

I’m in my apt in B’klyn in my bedroom. There are people in other parts of the place; I seem to be isolated here, in my room.

Then two things I become aware of at the same time. One, the fire escape is crowded with people – it extends across the two front windows, real life fire escape is only on one window, but there are two here. All of them are crowded with people trying to get some air, to be outside during this time of isolation, men & women are sitting sunning. I especially see a man in beige trunks, reclining halfway on his back. Everything is friendly, a good feeling of people being together.

*(ISOLATION, QUARANTINE VS PEOPLE BEING TOGETHER: This is about that dichotomy, being isolated, or being together. It beckons to mind when they say

“Alone in a crowded room”

If you have nothing in common with people, although there are many around you, you still feel isolated & alone. But if you have something in common or intimacy, you feel CONNECTED & not alone any more.)*

The second thing I see is on top of the table that holds a water tray is a small screen, like the screens people look at like a computer, but this is small. It’s only about 5” tall & 7” across. I never paid attention to this screen, like it had nothing I wanted on it, but now I see a TV show or movie is just beginning, & it’s well done.

There’s a man that seems to be an opera star / announcer, speaking in a grand voice in English, clearly, impressive looking & sounding. He’s tall, a feeling of an opera star, wearing a snug brown outfit, he stands with feet apart, arms akimbo delivering his message.

*(TALL MAN, LIKE AN OPERA STAR, IMPOSING: I did not see this right away but after getting toward the end of the dream realized it’s the man I love—Bobby– & there’s a weighty message here. At first glance I thought I had summoned a saint but it’s different.

BROWN OUTFIT, BLACK BOOTS: Brown seems to be a color coming up often these days both on him & myself. All colors mean multiple things, the definition I give to brown in the last two dreams is SERIOUS, a serious message.

BLACK BOOTS: Like all colors black has many definitions, one of them is MYSTERY—what is black is a mystery to us, it’s the unknown. This dream will reveal a serious mystery about my Beloved.

HE IS IMPRESSIVE: This is a large part of the mystery. This is my LOVER’S GOD SELF, HIS SOUL that has migrated from a previous lifetime to the one here & now. He is TALL because the God Self is IMPORTANT, God is important, it’s the part of us that is Immaculate—without sin—it is priceless & perfect. It is the lower self, not the actual God-Self/Soul that houses sins, {which must be clarified in Purgatory before we can see God face to face.}

There’s then the ‘lower soul’ which would be our unconscious, our lower spiritual energy-entity, while the God-Self Soul is the Highest Level. That is the one that migrates from body to body in various lifetimes.)*

I look at this & think I’ll stay & pay attention – it might be interesting.

Then it all changes. Now I’m in this movie, it’s come to life. The man is standing there in a theater or club with the stage behind him. He’s called a party – he’s special – hundreds of people came, I see them piling in, many so close to each other they seem to be on top of one another, in colorful party clothes, females & males.

*(PARTY EVERYONE WANTS TO COME: This is Bobby in this lifetime – attractive, popular, wants to have fun & everyone wants to be with him—male & female. He is a star.

COLORFUL CLOTHES: Lots of emotions, especially the women, they are infatuated or fascinated with him.)*

The man I now see more clearly is dressed in a ‘cavalier’ fashion in all brown, snug fitting with plain/elegant black boots up to his knees. He is at least a foot taller than anyone there – the visitors are average between 5 to 6’ tall, he’s 7’ tall.

(HE’S A FOOT TALLER THAN ANYONE HERE: This height is his God-Self. It is this that makes him a star. In another lifetime/s, he achieved great spiritual stature. The people around him, his family & friends, have not. They are attracted to his Spiritual Charisma – which is the Presence of the Holy Spirit.)

He stands there like ‘The Jolly Green Giant’; he always has his legs apart — imposing. Everyone wanted to come to his party & I’m here also.

(HIS PARTY, I’M HERE ALSO: I’m a part of his life & I think a lot of him.)

Now the giant man walks around his guests like in a hallway adjoining the room (with his attendants) & for some reason he just faintly puts his index finger on me – my shoulder I guess – to say he’s seen me.

(FAINTLY PUTS HIS FINGER ON ME LIKE TO SAY HE SEES ME: This must be when he first singled me out—I was so impressed, & took me to make love. But I did not see him again for three years—didn’t know where to find him.)

This made me feel special, because he’s the star, we’re like a bunch of ‘nobodies’ & for him to single me out is unusual.

(HOW HE MADE ME FEEL: indeed this accurately says how he made me feel when we met. I saw him as a great star & was lucky to be chosen – I said so to him. I even asked him if he was real or was I hallucinating or imagining him? He seemed ‘too good to be true.’ He didn’t see himself as special—his family & friends had not lifted him up.)

Shortly after that he does more than just faintly touch me with the tip of his finger, this time he puts his hand on me definitely to let me know he’s chosen me.

(PUTS HIS HAND ON ME STRONGLY: This is when we started going steady three years later. He told me he wanted to marry me.)

I now see myself, what I’m wearing. Wow, am I covered! And as I walked through the premises I took one sweater off, & was planning to take more & more off as I got more ‘confident’ so people could see how I looked.

First, my head. I have on a thick ribbed grey knitted cap which fits tightly over the head down my forehead. Underneath I have beautiful thick, curly blonde hair but I’m not showing it at all.

On my body I have several layers of light grey & black, mostly loose. One of the light grey things is like an ‘athlete’ shirt which has medium-thin straps that show all the shoulders & arms, except there’s the black under that. I’m so covered no one could see any hint of how I am underneath, so he isn’t choosing me for that.

*(MY LAYERS OF CLOTHES, BLACK & GREY, EVERYTHING COVERED & CONCEALED: This is a spiritual concealment, not physical. When we dated my body was obviously revealed; it was my SPIRIT that was hidden.

This says that HIS ATTRACTION TO ME WAS NOT MY BODY BUT HE SAW, FELT THE SPIRIT INSIDE ME—THAT WE WERE KIN & HE CHOSE ME AS HIS FROM THE BEGINNING.

Because I’m saying, I was concealed, no one could see my body – my body is the Real Me, True Self, God Self, but this explains he saw or felt this Real Me.

BLACK & GREY LAYERS CONCEALING ALL: This is me being a mystery – people don’t know who I am like the general population did not know who Jesus was until it was revealed. The Three Kings knew who He was, his Holy Mother & foster Father knew who He was, Holy Anna & St. Simon knew who He was, the Shepherds discovered he was Holy when the angels told them. His identity was revealed to the privileged but hidden to normal folks—Herod feared him not because he was a Spiritual Giant but he was predicted to be a King, & Herod thought he would be an earthly King—but of course Jesus said to Pilate in answer to the question if he was a King,

“My Kingdom is not of this world.”

Even his close friends & Apostles were not certain who He was when he asked who do people say I am? They said things like ‘Prophet’ but then Peter blurted out,

“You are the Messiah!”

And so, even though Jesus did many miracles & healings, his True Identity was still hidden, unrevealed, not obvious. It took the Holy Spirit to show Peter who Jesus was—Jesus said so.

In this dream, it says I saw the identity of my Beloved Bobby – I saw his God Self from the start. And he also saw that I was his Anointed mate, & in the end of this dream it’s revealed we were mates in a previous lifetime

THICK GREY RIBBED CAP ON MY HEAD COVERING HAIR, EVERYTHING, DOWN MY FOREHEAD: This is how thoroughly my God-Self was hidden to the public, yet my Soul Mate instinctively felt it. Covering the head would be covering the mind & thoughts, ‘Where my head is.”)*

OK, then I get close to the man, & as I do so, amazingly, he is shorter than me. I have my left hand over his shoulder, gently rubbing it like to show him I like him. He’s wearing a blue or green spandex type top, soft, it’s pleasant to have my hand on it as I caress him.

*(AMAZINGLY HE IS SHORTER THAN ME: This is spiritual stature. All is relative as far as this; he’s a foot higher than most people spiritually, but not as tall as I am. It means I evolved closer to God in previous lifetimes than he had, but still, we are both Great Souls.

MY HAND ON HIM, CARESSING: This could be saying first he put his hand on me to choose me, now I put my hand on him to accept.

GREEN/BLUE SOFT SPANDEX OUTFIT: This is here on earth, blue like the sky, green like the earth. We meet on the earth, he singles me out, I accept him. We desire each other. Hand on

SHOULDER: is comforting—as shoulders are what we carry the cross on.)*

To my surprise he starts speaking to me in RUSSIAN! He doesn’t know English at all! I try to explain to him, that my Grandma was Russian. We’re looking for something in common – he asked me like who I was or what I was about or something. I say to his attendants – how do you say Grandma in Russia? I say her name, her first name was Luba & her last married name I will not say, & it was Lithuanian anyway so it would be irrelevant. He has two female attendants who apparently know both languages; they’re dressed in red & are his height.

*(HE SPEAKS RUSSIAN, DOESN’T KNOW ENGLISH: This is the key to the dream, this scene/symbol opens up the entire meaning. I then bring up my Grandma {while trying to find some common ground},

RUSSIAN GRANDMA: Here I go back a couple generations to show WHAT WE HAVE IN COMMON. This tells me that the reason this man singled me out is that we were in relationship some generations ago – in a different land, culture & language.

He did not single me out merely for physical, in this lifetime, looks or anything. He saw through my COVERING or physical cover, the underlying IDENTITY or person he knew long ago – when we were together IN ANOTHER LIFETIME.

This explains why he’s CHOSEN ME. It’s like the Three Kings who sought out Jesus because he was their Guru in a previous lifetime. He was continuing his life in another body, but he was that SAME SOUL.

This dream explains that it is the GOD SELF that is reborn again & again in other bodies, that is the identity that continues. The body dies, the outward form, connection with the physical is all gone, & there’s a new body, nationality, culture & language. But the SOUL / GOD SELF has not CHANGED, it’s deep inside.

When people are drawn to each other in a mysterious/compulsive way, as if they knew each other before, it could what’s called TWIN FLAMES. Twin flames loved each other in a previous lifetime & have business to finish. Just as the Three Kings honored Jesus as their reincarnated Guru & gave him precious gifts, twin flames feel something that is underneath the physical, culture, language, cover & they feel a pull, a pull that will make them go through anything to be together.

This is why this Great man puts his finger on me – first lightly, then strongly, to say,

“YOU ARE THE ONE. I CHOOSE YOU.”

Out of all the people on earth, the twin flames recognize each other as being ONE, they cannot be happy with anyone else.)*

Then it seems it’s just him & me talking, a bit off to the side, & I try to reach him in ‘sign language.’

I want to tell him he’s a great man, & I make gestures to that effect of ‘something great.’ He isn’t aware I’m describing him & he asks who that is.

I point to him & say,

“It’s you.”

(SIGN LANGUAGE-GREAT MAN IS YOU: I am the only one he knows who recognizes his God-Self & that it is highly evolved. The people around him do not see this at all. Some have demoralized him, others diminish him, he has never had anyone ‘restore’ him or confirm his great God Identity. The reason we want to be together is called Divine Relationship—our God-Selves recognize each other.)

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

LOVER WAS TRAUMATIZED

LOVER WAS TRAUMATIZED

4-7-20-LOVER IS FRANK SINATRA & GREAT LADY

Reviewed & analyzed for someone else

Great prayers beget great dreams. I know this to be a result of my desperate prayers. I prayed to Mother God to assist me personally, I brought myself closer to her saying in every way how my happiness, my Heaven, can only happen when She is ONE with me. The problem is I criticize & judge myself too much, I cannot find peace of mind & happiness as I’m always finding fault with myself. My schedule, lifestyle, activities are not perfect by my standards, so I am always looking down at myself—I know this is wrong; it’s due to being abused, despised, criticized by my Mom & others.

This abuse lives in my head, in a sense, like Mom & Co are still there, their programs keep playing out. I realize this but am having trouble stopping, so I prayed strongly until I fell asleep.…………………….

FRANK SINATRA appears. Frank was a great guy, I helped him out of Purgatory, & so when he appears in this dream I don’t know if it’s really Sinatra or my lover/husband Peter.

Frank is sitting against a wall & I come close to him. He wants to tell me something & it’s very loving & intimate.

*(FRANK SINATRA: Is my lover/husband Peter. Why does he appear as Frank? Could it be because he wants to be a vocalist/rapper? Or an actor?

PURGATORY, I HELPED HIM OUT OF IT: This could apply to my lover as I helped him out of the earthly Purgatorial state he was in, doing multiple exorcisms, Masses & prayers for years, getting rid of many demons, freeing him up for God & peace of mind.)*

He says to me in a way that penetrates my heart – it’s like we melt into each other, he says,

“Wherever I go, whatever I do, I will always take you with me.”

I see over his heart three stripes, the rest of him is a sepia color, monochromatic, but the stripes remind me of the Lithuanian flag, yellow, green & red.

So he’s saying he’ll always carry me in his heart. It’s hard to explain the feeling that goes with this, it’s deep.

(MY FLAG STRIPES OVER HIS HEART, HE’LL ALWAYS TAKE ME WHEREVER HE GOES: This is saying I will always be in his heart, a part of him, united, that he will always love me.)

AFTER THAT starts another dream.

I walk into a large room. To the right is a Great Lady, hovering over a man sitting at a ‘cafeteria style’ table. She seems to be comforting him, sort of consoling & flirting, he seems to be wearing an ‘army olive’ color top. But when I walk in she immediately stands up – in fact – in these dreams whenever I enter a room, she stands up to greet me—I’m impressed because this shows so much respect.

*(GREAT LADY: My Mother God within me, the Presence of God, the Real Me, who I really am, “I am a Soul, I have a body, my purpose is Love.”

This God-Self RESPECTS MY LOWER SELF GREATLY, She stands up whenever I enter a room. This is the respect ‘God the Father’ would give his own Son, Jesus Christ, because it is in the body that God implemented our salvation. It is in the body God suffered, not in Heaven, not in the God Self, but in the lower self, & so, great respect is given to ‘God the Son’.

In the same way, God my Mother is giving the respect to my lower self or body – She did her work through God her Daughter.)*

She also is saying to me, by her action, that yes, she was giving attention to this guy at the table, but I’m more important than him.

(MAN AT TABLE SHE IS CONSOLING: This is the lover/husband. Yes, She loves him, but gives more honor/respect to me.)

As she stands up I see how tall she is – about six feet – her arms & legs are long, she has long brown hair to the middle of her back & wearing a clinging red mini dress. She puts her arms around me & holds me a while.

*(SIX FEET TALL LADY: This is my spiritual height, I was shown/told – the same as Joan of Arc in Heaven. By contrast, my dear Dad is a dwarf. I saw him in Heaven, I bent down to him to say hello, it was whimsical, because I always looked up to him & in his obituary the author said he looked at him as a saint. He’s a small saint.

By contrast, my wicked Mom & brother are lower– I did not see them standing but sitting in a dim light in the balcony of Heaven–& in another vision Mom was in a small house—the size of an apt, like one-bedroom, plain, with a picture of my brother on the table waiting for him to join her {he’d not yet died}. There was a sign that she ‘just made it’ into Heaven – the sign was that outside I saw a stovepipe, smoke was coming out, & it had tar on it—tar means Hell.

In comparison I might add that the beautiful actor Errol Flynn inhabits an entire tropical island suspended in Heaven! Yes he had a long Purgatory, but he had underneath it all, a good heart, he gave a lot to those he loved & he did suffer—people don’t realize how much he suffered—read his book, ‘My Wicked, Wicked Ways.’)*

She’s some kind of an executive, an important Lady in show business production.

Then I hear an inner voice & I repeat it to her:

“Make a video/movie {I hear a description or word that denotes like ‘behind the scenes production’ but can’t recall that word} of Frank & myself.”

Frank is a vocalist. I’m thinking about that. Does he still have a voice? It’s odd that I would tell this great lady to do this movie–that she would listen & obey. Who am I to tell her what to do? But she respects me that much. I see her sitting at a desk to my left front, with her assistants around her, she has a staff. She has a thoughtful face, she’s also beautiful.

I see us being busy making this movie but can’t recall details.

*(THE MOVIE I SAY TO MOTHER GOD SHE SHOULD MAKE ABOUT US: I am stumped Mother God. I already tried to help him years ago & it backfired on me. Now what? Is this literally true or what is it a symbol of?

She: This I believe refers to ‘Reality TV.’ You, the flesh, under inspiration, is saying to create a Reality Show about you & him, with him as a performer.

Me: But would it work?

She: Yes.

Me: I can see it now. He & I have an emotional reunion. He confesses to his mistakes, he professes his love, I interrogate him & he repents it all.

We have a spiritual wedding with all the trimmings.

Then, I rent a place to preach, with a pulpit. I give a rousing sermon. Sermon over, I take off my robe & under it a scanty outfit. I dance–splits, kicks, the whole megilla. He pops out & raps & dances. His beauty will be recognized as well as his talent. We could even do a Jayne Mansfield, Micky Hargitay routine; she called ‘adagio,’ where she climbed on him for poses. The fact that its an old lady with ‘America’s Most Beautiful Man’ will get views.

Mother God: You have the wherewithal to do this, do it & it will create a sensation. Send it to all the TV media & they will take you on, haha.)*

Last thing I do recall is I am in an apt, mine & lovers, & someone has stolen & removed our bed—the apt is Hollywood long ago. We were both sleeping on the floor on a light blue rug—it was comfortable, lots of covers, warm. My side has more of the nice blue rug, his side has a bit of a black one, like the rubber mats I have, not as comfortable.

*(HIS SIDE, BLACK RUBBER MAT, NOT AS COMFORTABLE: He’s more miserable without you than you are without him.

THE APT IN HOLLYWOOD: You shared with a demonic con artist. This is saying Satan broke you & Peter up – took away your bed or intimacy.)*

When we wake up I look at our situation & talk about the bed, & basically say it’s not a terrible thing, we just have to buy another bed, maybe a Queen sized one.

(BUY ANOTHER BED, QUEEN SIZED: The past doesn’t matter, we can improve our relationship.)

I recall a scene where I was getting ready to ‘go out’ with Frank. I had on the most ordinary thick-material black dress, loose. Then I say,

“This is Frank Sinatra – he deserves me being dressed up nicely. I then remove a form-fitting black leather jacket (nice one) off myself with maybe black leather gloves, & place it on a table near the door. He’s watching.

I go to get clothes & find a medium light brown wool tight skirt with a flare (it’s gathered in the back under the hips, with a cloth band across it maybe, so much like the type of skirts I used to love as a kid) & put it on, in front of a mirror – it might be the kind of wool that has colorful flecks in it – I used to wear those as a teen. Frank is behind me. Can’t recall what else I put on or where we go.

*(REMOVE LOOSE BLACK DRESS, REMOVE BLACK LEATHER JACKET, LOOK FOR NICE CLOTHES AS FRANK IS SPECIAL: End of our separation, which was like an ending or funeral, time to be together again. I feel like my old self, when I was young.

SKIRT LIKE BACK IN THE DAY: The wool is sheep or submit {sheep are submissive} again to have sex with him – the hint is this is a skirt which covers the lower part of the body—It’s light brown with flecks, which might denote ‘serious color’ rather than depressing black, & the flecks & flare might say ‘a fun skirt—have fun, enjoy life again.’)*

One strange little scene. Frank is once again sitting against a wall on the floor. The Great Lady is nearby & she says,

“He’s part black” or maybe she said “he’s black.”

I look at his face. It’s a child’s face, like compressed so it’s too wide, {but his body is that of an adult}, with medium light brown skin & both his cheeks are as puffy as baseballs, with those stripes like he had on his heart on both his cheeks {my native country flag stripes}. I carefully bend over to him & kiss his little cheek lightly, just as you would that of a child, a sweet little peck.

*(CHILD’S FACE MY FLAG STRIPES ON HIS CHEEKS, HIS CHEEKS LIKE BASEBALLS, COMPRESSED HEAD, BROWN SKIN: This is the child within, who was damaged. The compressed head could be injury, mental compression. Consider when a person is strangled, their neck is compressed until they can’t breathe. This squeezing down on the head could be mental trauma affecting one’s brain or mind, he can’t think straight.

SITTING AGAINST A WALL: In a desperate place, nowhere to go, like being cornered.

CHEEKS LIKE BASEBALLS—these are called ‘chipmunk cheeks’ because chipmunks fill themselves up with food & store it in their burrows. When people store a great deal, they are preparing against future need or ‘famine,’ – people who have fear of war or poverty hoard many necessities, including food. {In these ‘Pandemic’ times people are doing it—the media is encouraging hysteria. The revoking of civil rights is far worse than the virus.}

I saw a man who had lived through WWII in Germany, now living in America–his cellar was stocked with canned goods & grains like it was a bunker.

These fat cheeks represent INSECURITY, fear of being without, & both cheeks have your flags. This means the child within him needs you – a symbol of SECURITY & all that it represents—someone to love him like a Mother, take care of him, not reject or abandon him.

It means he’s FIXATED on the trauma of what was done to him. He was HURT, REJECTED, ABUSED & EMOTIONALLY ABANDONED BY BOTH PARENTS. He needs you to give him safe space, harbor, a place of trust, where he WON’T BE AFRAID.

HE’S BLACK: The black people have been severely abused in America & elsewhere, first as slaves with no human rights, second as ‘economic slaves’ with limited opportunities, sharecropping, menial & unskilled labor, lowest wages, prejudice & hate. The Great Lady/Mother God is telling you this has been his fate – he’s been treated this way, all here described—as a child.

THE SWEET PECK ON HIS CHEEK: You are treating him like a child, with the tenderness/gentleness a child needs—you’ve been careful to recognize the damage here & just because he has a man’s body, you have not assumed he has ‘grown up,’ – matured fully. You have known all along he was BADLY hurt & his behavior reflects that. You forgave all his hurtful actions toward you on that basis.)*

The feeling overall is that Frank is a great star, he loves me & wants to be with me & he makes me happy.

(FRANK IS A STAR: You see him & treat Peter like a star, to you he is.)

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

LOVER BUYS ME WEDDING DRESS

MY LOVER WANTS TO MARRY ME.

HE’S SICK WITH WORRY ABOUT OUR

BEING APART

4-6-20-HE BRINGS WEDDING DRESS-DESPERATE 4 MY LOVE

Interpreted for a friend.

I’m in my house upstairs, standing in one of the halls. To the right is the bath, to the left a large closet with no door, across the door is open to the guest room.

My good husband Richard did not sleep all night (I slept) but he still went out to work & he’s just returned. I see he has bought MY WEDDING DRESS & semi-secretly, he is putting it into the closet—I see half of it before he pushes it back to maybe hide it. I don’t think he sees me looking, he doesn’t look at me.

*(RICHARD MY GOOD HUSBAND: This is Hal, the man I love who loves me. When his disposition toward me is great he appears as Richard, because Richard was the best man I ever had.

SLEEP-DID NOT SLEEP ALL NIGHT: This indicates concern, worry; sleeplessness is when one’s MIND is not at rest. Notice I DID sleep – because I am not worried about Hal & myself, I know we’ll be together.

WEDDING DRESS, HE BOUGHT MY WD: This says he’s planning to be with me as man & wife. He’s thinking & doesn’t know I can read his mind so he doesn’t see me – but I see him.

CLOSET, THIS CLOSET: This particular closet has meaning. Look to details of each symbol. I asked myself ‘How is this closet different from the other ones?’ This is where I housed the clothing for my male models in preparation to photograph them. So this closet means PREPARATION, BEING READY TO FULFILL A ROLE, AN IMAGE. Into this closet Hal, now being the good husband, prepares to treat me like the wife that I am, to even present me to the world that way.)*

I am highly surprised at his buying my wedding dress. I see white net, with a row of beautiful artificial flowers embedded on it, the flowers like a big ‘corsage’ from the waist type deal down the skirt, some are bigger, then they get smaller in a row, all are white large petals completely open with stamens inside. I didn’t want to let him know that I saw the dress in case he wanted to keep it secret.

*(HOW THE DRESS LOOKS: White net is see-through, apparent or obvious—I have picked up his plans easily, he might be showing his intentions to others—in other words, his thoughts & plans ARE SHOWING. The

WHITE BLOSSOMS, FULLY OPEN, LIKE A CORSAGE: Are love, fully OPEN blossoms, petals, means his heart is open to this marriage.)*

I also felt sorry for him because he must be so tired, but he’s hanging in there, & I see him standing to the rest room door to the right, he seems shorter this moment as in real life he’s tall–& he has a small pot belly & a spare tire on his middle, he’s naked & there is a kind of soft light around him, soft yellow like sunshine.

*(SHORTER THAN IN REAL LIFE: He’s humbled himself.

POT BELLY & SPARE TIRE: Could be he’s being nourished by God/grace as I see

LIGHT AROUND HIM: For sure the Grace of God, he’s SEEING THE LIGHT, I see his spiritual awakening.)*

Oh yes, at one point I went to sneak-peak at the dress & it was not the same dress. It was a party dress, sort of Latin, in many bright colors, hugging the body, then flaring out with a grey ribbon across the flare. I hated the sleeves, like they buttoned midway between the wrist & elbow – for me that is tight & uncomfortable. I thought to myself

“This is not the dress I want. I don’t think I’ll wear it, it probably won’t fit me anyway.”

Did he buy this dress? I also thought it looked ordinary, even cheap; I’m surprised he would buy such a garment for me.

*(THE PARTY DRESS I DID NOT LIKE, WON’T WEAR: This is the relationship as it was before I stopped. All we did was sex. For him it was ‘releasing his love’ & getting mine & for a while, I felt it was the only thing I could do, but then I knew I could never be happy this way. This you could call ‘cheap’ in that the lover does nothing with effort or respect, does not present me to his people, presents a different woman on social media, while I’m the secret ‘play toy.’ No, I will not wear this dress means I will not PLAY THIS ROLE.

On the other hand, the white dress he put into the closet represents the purity of True Love, & being transparent (the net) to the public about it—

NET is also a symbol of ‘catching someone’ like a fish in a net—people are proud of ‘catching’ someone they love & showing them off.)*

Then in the room across, standing with his back to the front window, his front to the bed & me, is a person I scarcely recognize from long ago, who was my best friend for years. He misjudged me on something, accused me & broke up. He’s here now but hard to recognize, I keep saying,

“Joe, is it you? Joe, is it you?”

He doesn’t look like himself. His hair is like a sort of woman’s wig, very thick in front sticking out, thick in back, sticking out also, very grey, strange. And on the back of the hair is a pair of light blue cotton women’s panties, just sitting there hugging the hair like some sort of cap.

*(WHO IS JOE? Joe is the same man in the form of Rich, the good husband—I have never seen both of them in the same dream – Joe is another persona or aspect of Hal.

Joe represents here Hal knows he was MISTAKEN in breaking up with me—I did not do what he accused me of. This says he’s SORRY & WORRIED SICK over us being apart. The clues are:

THE THICK GREY HAIR:

Means worry, lots of it. Sticking out the front & the back is both sides of the brain, the primitive back brain & the temporal lobes in front, which is spiritual & intellectual & checks impulses or lower self. This is really worried, haha.

WOMEN’S UNDERWEAR, LIGHT BLUE COTTON PANTIES LIKE A CAP

: What he’s worried about, we’re not together, not intimate, not having sex. And furthermore, he is standing in:

THE GUEST ROOM: He is not standing in my bedroom – where he would be INTIMATE with me, he’s in the guest room, which means we are apart. That underscores the WORRY.

His face is hard to distinguish. It’s angular & vertical in its lines, & sort of ‘bleached out’ or his features all run together. His nose & head are thin, all his features thin & vertical.

{His face reminds me of this poor man I saw on TV who was wrongly accused of killing his wife & children, an ex-cop. He spent THIRTEEN YEARS in & out of jail, two trials, two appeals before he was exonerated—NOT GUILTY, thirteen years of torture. His uncle fought for him on the outside. The people investigating his case from the get-go botched the whole thing – there was a t shirt of the perpetrator right by the crime – they did not even send out to have his DNA checked on Codis—lied that they had done it with no results. Years went by with new lawyers pushing, it was finally checked, & there was the killer. I was rooting so hard for the poor cop.}

His hair is so strange that I say jokingly to a male friend also in the room, standing to my left,

“Hey, maybe you should get a hairdo like that.”

*(ANOTHER MALE FRIEND: Whenever there’s a random male friend near him, I assume it to be his Guardian Angel, who I’ve prayed to often for help. I’m joking with the Guardian Angel about how WORRIED Hal is. This pain he’s going through is salutary because pain is the ‘megaphone of God’ – ‘God whispers to us in our pleasures & shouts to us in our pain’ & also the cliché ‘absence makes the heart grow fonder’ & to top it off, ‘You never miss your water ‘till the well runs dry.’ And might I add ‘Why buy the cow when you can get the milk for free?’

FACE LIKE THE POOR COP WRONGLY ACCUSED: As I describe here this man suffered greatly a long time & the liberation he dubbed ‘a miracle.’ The face shows depression. Hal feels like that—he’s endured pain about me for a long time & longs to be set free. That’s what he’s experienced– if he felt the pain I have, given me by him, he’d be dead.)*

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

HOPES FAILED<>LOVE REMAINS

HOPES FAILED<>LOVE REMAINS

4-2-20-BROKEN MANSE HIDING VALUABLES-SCARY MOVIE SET & MOVIE ON LOCATION

There was a MOVIE SET I am present at & it is SCARY.

(MOVIE SET I AM IN: Theater of life, my life.)

It has something suspended way in the air, as if not attached to anything – a vehicle. Later I see it as attached, & on top is a truck (like you use for hauling, two or three times as big as a pickup truck, its open in back, its painted red, the rest is grey & black. Its suspended way up & precariously angled at a 90 degree downward.

I think to myself that some crazy guy might get into it & drive it with dire consequences & suddenly someone does. He is in it, gets it started & drives down some kind of ramp—fortunately no accidents occur.

*(VEHICLE, TRUCK, PRECARIOUS 90 DEGREE ANGLE: A way given, possibly from Heaven (high above, seemed not attached to the earth but then later you see is attached), that seems scary & dangerous – a way of doing something one needs to do – possibly getting out of a bad situation. It has to do with a male you are concerned about – could be lover Peter who is in dire straits, & it’s scary for him to MAKE A MOVE—but HE DOES IT.

RED TRUCK BEING DRIVEN: person is in a scary, painful situation but boldly makes a move & comes out OK.)*

This entire thing is a MOVIE SET. What am I doing here? Guess I’m in it. The company has taken over a huge mansion like a palace with ornate interiors – besides the scary contraption we are all in this ornately furnished mansion.

*(HUGE MANSION COMPANY HAS TAKEN OVER: Residence is a PLACE OF CONSCIOUSNESS, where one’s mind & heart are – good or bad. To be in a mansion like this is SPIRITUAL GREATNESS or being in a good state – your state. Extreme stress moves one closer to God, we are closer to God when suffering. The

SCARY CONTRAPTION: is what does one have to do in this time to survive? This Pandemic? Where people are thrown on their ass, without work or money or security? What do they do?)*

Right now I am outside in a kind of yard, looking into the great mansion as well as an old mansion to the left which is completely decrepit on the outside, falling down walls, roof, all caving in, all made of dark wood, two floors high. It’s on a lot with buildings within 10-15’ of it on all sides with fences or walls up to the second floor – no one seems to notice it but myself.

*(DECREPIT MANSION: This is the past relationship between you & lover Peter—it is decrepit, fallen apart, the way it used to be is over, finished. You aren’t ‘there’ any more.

WALLS, FENCES HIGH ALL AROUND IT: & no one seems to notice but me, means that no one knew or understood all the great things you had in mind for him, they were & are hidden.)*

Outside a window is a strange sight – like fifty chairs all fitted into each other sticking out of a window, all completely rusted. I jokingly say to a friend nearby, do you need any chairs?—pointing them out.

One standout thing is the

*(CHAIRS, ALL RUSTY, ABOUT 50, ALL FITTED ONE INTO THE OTHER: Chairs are positions, seats like thrones, places of rest or comfort. They represent the things you wanted for Peter – the accomplishments you would help him attain, the kudos, laurels, successes, all now

OUT THE WINDOW: meaning over, finished, will not be. It seems like a joke – all you wished for him – as you speak of it to a friend. ‘Rusty’ means it hasn’t been used, didn’t happen.)*

Another window had other items sticking out, can’t recall what.

But INSIDE I see ornately carved bureaus, hand carved, some goldeny colored, some darker brown, like new, so ornate I know they would cost a fortune.

I think to myself why are those bureaus there, & how could a person get them – valuable, & I don’t understand why they’re in this crumbling, broken down, falling down mansion.

*(VALUABLE, ORNATE, HAND CARVED BUREAUS, SOME GOLDENY, SOME BROWN: What is LEFT of that relationship is not the outside ambitions you had for him but what was inside, the inner value of the love.

Bureaus would be things that hold things – these are

CHESTS OF DRAWERS: Chest refers to heart, & the drawers hold many things. This evokes the heart holding many ways of love, the desires to see another happy, whatever it takes. In other words, your heart held for him many ambitions, desires that you thought would bring him the things he wanted – but he did not cooperate, those things are gone. He will not be a ‘somebody,’ in the eyes of the world – he will not ‘succeed’ at any great career, finding fame or recognition.

But the valuable love is still there wishing to heal him of his maladies, so he can be happy. This you want to retrieve from the failures – take out of that affair what had the deeper meaning.

HAND CARVED: Hands refer to the giving of love.

GOLDENY CHESTS OR BUREAUS: True love, gold is love.

SOME DARKER, BROWN: The dark spots you went through for love have great value, suffering is all we have to give to God – She gives us everything else. {Words of St. Francis of Assisi.})*

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

YOUR LOVE WILL RESUME

YOUR LOVE WILL RESUME

4-1-20-OLD-BEST FRIEND RETURNS

dream interpreted for a friend

I had a best friend, Steven, who I loved & he loved me, for ten years. Then he had a misunderstanding about me—suspected me of doing something I didn’t do & because of it, dropped being my friend.

(STEVEN: This is the man you love. He misunderstood something he thought you did years ago & turned against you, moved in with another woman, but now he’s back or will be momentarily.)

Now I see him again. I am outside in a yard & see his head beyond a tall fence – just his head on the other side while he talks to someone—the house he lives in vaguely is behind him.

I’m not attracted to him any more, & think how if we got together I would be loathe to have sex with him. In fact, I guess he’s my HUSBAND & yes I did love him but now he’s sort of repulsive to me. I look at his head & somehow both his head & dick seem small.

*(SMALL HEAD & DICK, REPULSIVE: His head is the attitude, way of thinking, his stupidity, & the dick part is if you no longer like his ways, you don’t like his dick either. You recall all the cruel, revengeful & cold hearted things he did to you over the years.

TALL FENCE, HE’S ON OTHER SIDE: This is he’s with another woman, part of the reason you hate him, the

TALKING: means relating, he’s relating to another woman.)*

Then things happen. It’s like we go to dinner somewhere & we’re being feted—I don’t know why. Things have CHANGED.

(CHANGED: This is saying he is not with the other woman, he’s returned to you & someone, somehow, is BLESSING, NOURISHING, giving you HAPPINESS.)

As we sit a waitress appears who is SPECIAL. We’ve been already given food, but her appearance is extra. I tell people about it later, how she appeared, what a boon it was.

She makes food for us during this time of GREAT NEED. She cooks & serves us, & it’s grand.

(SPECIAL WAITRESS, COOKING FOR US GREAT FOOD, A BOON: This woman represents the Heavenly Mother or God. She has visited us, brought us together, has granted happiness to us. Her visit is her blessings, Power & Love.)

Then I see a dish she made which is HUGE—it is one of those small pools I have outside to feed the animals, about 3.5’ across, a foot deep. This plastic bowl is filled with a dish she made where the top of it is like pizza or lasagna, it’s a thick sauce, red, like tomato on top, but the tomato is dark & thick & has something in it-not sure what-that makes it ‘meaty.’ She already made it but it has to sit, some type chemicalization, & we ask about when it can be eaten & she says IN TWO DAYS. Wow, what have we deserved to get all this?

*(IN TWO DAYS: You asked when something would happen where he would contact you & the affair would resume. Could this be the answer? Does two days mean two days, two weeks, two months or even two years? There is no TIME in the afterlife & so it’s difficult to gage a prediction here.

What I do know is the

HUGE BOWL filled with a dish: big enough to be a pool for a few ducks or a couple geese. It means HUGE BENEFIT, BOON, BLESSING, GIFT or JOY.

MEATY TOMATO SAUCE TOP (not real wet, medium dry, something substantial which has to become more substantial by sitting: This gift is not ready today but will be in the time called ‘two days.’ Perhaps you will get a SIGN in two days—like the messages he’s been leaving on social media—messages that can be taken more than one way but he knows you know it’s to you {his live-in is too dumb to understand.}

Me: Momgod I’m stumped. Need your help. This could say a lot, but what specifically? I know there are big clues.

She: I suspect that in a couple days the conditions are ‘stewing’, ‘brewing’ or ‘gestating’ to be ENJOYED by him & you, so what would please both of you more than anything is if his affair with Stefania ended & yours would begin.

The huge dish might be a BIG FIGHT. There is reason to believe she covered all the bills—even food–& he gave nothing. Now she has no money & is desperate to keep the family under the roof with food on the table, including diapers & formula for their child, but he refuses to fork over his salary. One can see how this would drive her ape shit & she would turn on him.

The symbols point to both bad & good—sometimes what is bad for one person is good for another—the pool/bowl is

BLACK: nothingness {no color}, depression, ending, funeral—their liaison ends.

RED, MEATY TOMATO SAUCE ON TOP: Red is pain, suffering,

MEATY: would be weighty, serious, and strong. {A spiritual child can only have milk {consolation}, but when you grow up you can consume the ‘strong meat’ God gives of suffering.} This symbol is common in Mystical Theology. The

HUGENESS: of this dish is the hugeness of the event, a relationship that went on for years, that you have prayed about so long – will suddenly cease. That is your GIFT from the SPECIAL WAITRESS who is Mother God, who has ORCHESTRATED or PREPARED this event for you two.

Me: Mother God, people will say this is cruel to Stefania, will wish me bad luck rather than good. How do you explain that their breakup is from God, which leaves her & their child in poverty?

She: She has to find the road out of poverty that is not the devil & Hell—there are means of survival for her—family, friends & social welfare agencies. He did not help financially anyway–& is still unable to do so.

The relationship was wrong. He was in desperate need, God sent him a woman to love who could save him, but he chose the path of Satan – he even said he had ‘sold his soul to the devil’ for ‘party lifestyle & popularity’ – he listened to lowlife drug addicts, abusive family & ignorant ‘friends,’ –you have suffered terribly for this.

It was God’s will from the beginning that you two be together– neither one of you can be happy any other way. Being apart was being outside the Will of God.

During these years of deprivation you never gave up & continually prayed for him. Your prayers saved his life from an overdose. She has nothing to give him but the flesh & more substances – she cannot heal him of his afflictions & the need for medication – your prayers have begun his healing.

If people cannot understand this then it’s too bad – it’s none of their business anyway. It’s your lives, not theirs, let them take care of their own lives & stay out of yours. You are doing God’s will & that’s all that matters, the popularity contest is over, the public opinion is irrelevant.)*

College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, College of the Gender War, Uncategorized

MY PLENTY HER FAMINE

MY PLENTY HER FAMINE

GAUNT COWS EAT UP THE FAT ONES—THEY’VE HAD THEIR TIME OF

PLENTY—NOW FAMINE HITS THEM

4-1-20-FAT DEVIL-GAUNT WOMEN

for a friend, her dream

There is some ‘to-do’ about my apt – I have had trouble finding a suitable one in previous dreams, seems I have a decent one now except for one thing – the devil is in it, my roommate. Other than that I can’t place the apt as any I’ve ever lived in.

(APT LIKE NONE I’VE EVER LIVED IN: This I already sense is not about me/you – you are seeing in the skin of another person, & the devil is ‘Jake the lover.’ You will now see from the eyes of Jake’s roommate, Priscilla, what she’s experiencing from him now—his other side. He’s been putting up a ‘front / act’ with her to get what he needed but the façade has dropped, she now sees his truly evil self.)

I come home & set to opening the door & there are FIVE LOCKS. The demon {in the form of a man I used to know} helps open the door. Why five locks? I wonder. I ask him, do we really need five locks? They are all types, some large–deadlocks. When he came to the door he was a bit flustered that I might not get in promptly.

*(FIVE LOCKS: Momgod, help, I haven’t a clue.

She: The five locks, what do locks do? They keep people from getting in, they keep one’s place safe, secret, locked in. Don’t look at this physically but MENTALLY.

The many locks preserve the safety / secrecy of what is going on here but you, in a moment, will see the truth of what you always suspected. And by

MAKING SURE YOU GET IN: he wants you to know what you believed is correct. It’s time. In particular, he wants you to know he did not love this woman, he used her, – because now that this stint is over, he wants you back.

His clothing says:

BLACK PANTS: the fact that you will not have sex with him any more bothers him. Black is absence or end or ‘funeral.’

RED PULL-ON TOP: He is hurting for lack of your love, he is in pain {red is fresh blood, the shirt goes over his torso & heart, it’s emotional pain.}

DEMON, HE IS THE DEMON: Because he used this woman, you are in her skin now, &– late this year will be five years – his secret remained all that time—five locks. {The reason he USED HER is because he did not love her & did not contribute to her & their child with any of his resources.} This will be revealed to her now, she sees it, because of what is happening or about to happen. {you did tell her but she refused to believe, she was hoping/imagining the affair would some day be ‘wine & roses,’ but all that happened was lies & deception – now she has no money & the truth will be clear.})*

The apt is fine, it’s ok, nothing bad; except for one thing—he’s here. But he’s getting ready to go out & as soon as he does I can relax & be happy.

(HIS BEING HERE IS THE ONLY BAD THING: He is the worst thing in her life. She has to make it now for herself & the child, he is redundant, he is superfluous, just another burden & he contributes nothing. She anticipates relief & happiness when he’s gone–or when this evil personality changes {not a chance.})

He look exactly like the demonic guy I used to live with in my early 20’s {he was a professional con man, lived off people, lived off me for a while.} He’s pulling on black pants with a bright red jersey top, like a pull-on top. His middle is filled in, there is no waist indentation. He has a look on his face that shows nothing, maybe ‘anything goes’ or ‘whatever.’ I can’t wait for him to leave.

*(IN HER EARLY 20’s: Priscilla is young

PROFESSIONAL CON MAN, LIVES OFF PEOPLE INCLUDING ME: Indeed, his pattern—You told her, she didn’t listen.

I explained the meaning of his outfit already.

NO WAIST, STRAIGHT UP & DOWN: He is at no loss for his own needs, not hungry or thin, feeds himself with his money, buys what he needs – mainly substances & habits.)*

NEXT SCENE

In the next scene I am in my B’klyn apt but it is different in that it has a staircase off to the left as I’m facing it, & people who I don’t know are gathering.

*(B’KLYN APT: This was a place of great changes, highs & lows, where I saw God face to face but also martyred by the Divine Interior Stigmata. It hearkens to monumental change, in the end, all turning out good.

STAIRCASE TO THE LEFT: There was no floor above me, this would be going to the roof. This sounds like ‘staircase to Heaven’ but also ‘the Cross of Our Lord’—indeed, his Cross led to Heaven, as He paid for our sins. Therefore, this staircase is a great death, salvation & resurrection, death of one leading to life for someone else.

It seems like what is unfolding is the end of Priscilla {shown again & again in dreams} but a resurrection for me & ‘Jake the lover.’ {Yes we see his evil side here, but he isn’t all evil. He was severely damaged, trying to survive, making bad decisions. We are young & dumb before we get old & wise. People do make mistakes – they learn by them, they change. He’s written poems, posts, begged about making mistakes, repented about her a hundred times on social media–praying I would see it. She was too dumb to catch on or if she did, did nothing about it. I just ignored him & let him keep suffering to learn his lessons.})*

On the staircase on one step is one of my iron barbells & the same on another step. Someone is sitting on the steps & I want to remove the barbells so they can be more comfortable – maybe another person might want to sit there.

*(BARBELLS ON ONE STEP & ANOTHER: barbells are iron; metal to me is usually the nails they put into Jesus—which represents the WILL OF GOD. This indicates what is to happen is THE WILL OF GOD. She must end, I must begin. I was told this in years, in hundreds of dreams—it was hard to believe but I kept my faith. Now here it is, about to happen.

SOMEONE SITTING HERE: Sounds like the person to be crucified – her. I do not see the person’s identity, but I’m trying to help them, make them more comfortable, means I have charity for them, not animosity.)*

I see a female come in, then another & another. They are all GAUNT, thin, with gaunt faces like I have an image a painting of a gaunt, dark haired woman with short hair with a gaunt child in her lap – they all look the same – I don’t know them. I get the feeling this is more their apt than mine – they don’t even see me I don’t think, they don’t look at me or speak to me.

GENESIS 41: When two full years had passed, Pharaoh had a dream: He was standing by the Nile,

when out of the river there came up seven cows, sleek and fat, and they grazed among the reeds.

After them, seven other cows, ugly and gaunt, came up out of the Nile and stood beside those on the riverbank.

And the cows that were ugly and gaunt ate up the seven sleek, fat cows. Then Pharaoh woke up.

*(GAUNT WOMEN-SEVERAL-MAYBE FIVE: First, the gauntness. This is hunger, in Pharaoh’s dream, famine, which is to us an economic crash, bankruptcy. Now mind you, they lived a good life but week to week. They wanted for nothing, she gave all, she supported him. I suffered because of my love–they didn’t care, she hated me. Then her years of ‘plenty’ceased, her famine begins, my famine ends, my years of plenty begin – isn’t karma wonderful?

Now as you stand here, it seems you are like the ‘fly on the wall’—the women don’t see you but you see them, it’s your vision of what’s happening to her/them, not their vision of what’s happening to you. This says the woman/women are in the state called ‘famine.’

By contrast, you see the demon, lover Jake again, going to the rest room, & he is FAT because he has no famine, he’s feeding himself—not his family.

Why several women? It can be interpreted more than one way. One way, it’s been several years where she got no resources from him. Second, it could be a prediction that this famine / bankruptcy will continue for a while. Could be five weeks, months, could be more if she does not work.

And third, possibly the most likely, is she is reaching out to her female friends, but they are all in the same boat, gaunt, all experiencing financial loss, cannot give her safe harbor, all discussing how to survive. She might be asking if she can move in with a lady friend – several of them have infants. But if they are all out of work how do they survive? These things are probably being discussed—reaching out to social services is a must—applying to Catholic Charities & other agencies could work.

NOTE: It’s worth explaining that during these last few years, not a one of them cared about me. They stole him from me, he was all I had. They lived off ‘the fat of the land.’ They had enough money; they lived well & happy while I suffered, to the point of having five heart attacks, temporarily dying. It’s a wonder I came back – they did not care a whit, only made fun of me because of my age.

Now it’s their turn to suffer. Is turnabout fair play? Tables turned, shoe on the other foot? Karma is a bitch? I am impervious to the economic crash & I have gotten over the obsession with lover Jake. I can take him or leave him, would rather take him but not having him won’t kill me—before it could & did kill me.

Now this woman who scorned me & deprived me, looked down on me, turned her friends against me, has dust in her mouth. They all said it was impossible for him to love me because of my age—now they will eat their words & curse their fate.)*

Then I see a man who reminds of the demon in my apt – like him, he is straight up & down, no waist, his middle is full, he’s unattractive, even ugly, & I see him going to the rest room, somewhat half dressed so I see his up & down body.

*(NO WAIST: Explained before, he feeds himself, deprives his family of support.

Everything I told the people who knew us will now be made obvious to them. Jake is a gigolo—he never loved the woman he used. He never used me, never asked me for anything, because he wanted me to admire him, think high of him, not low. If you don’t care what a person thinks of you you can use them, & if they find out, they find out, you’ve lost nothing. He doesn’t want me to think he’s a user, a gigolo, so he has not done to me what he did to her. It will all come out in the wash now.)*

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

SWITCH FROM HER TO ME

3-31-20-CHANGE IN RELATIONSHIPS

interpreted for a friend

I am with my boy friend Jackson, outside, standing in a place that reminds me of the old ‘drive in’ theaters. His female roommate is standing here also – the three of us.

The movie screen is way up high, maybe 30’ on a wall before us, we all three look at it talking about it. John is tall, she seems short. She’s wearing clothes that have plants pictured on the material—mostly green with splashes of other colors on top of white, it’s loose clothing.

*(HE IS TALL: He’s important to me.

SHE IS SHORT: She’s not important to me.

HER TOP, WHITE WITH PLANTS ON IT, GREEN, OTHER COLORS: She has PLANS for this relationship to nurture & grow—{Plants are like your garden, it grows, it bears food, nourishment, could be plants you eat or flowers, flowers mean love.}

MOVIE SCREEN, LIKE DRIVE-IN THEATERS: This is the ‘theater of life,’ the three of you are facing & thinking about what is to come?

HIGH UP, MAYBE 30’: High up is like reaching to the sky or God, asking what is the future? What does the theater of life bode for us, what is the next scene?)*

He is talking a lot, I am trying to talk to him but having trouble, as he keeps DEFERRING TO HER like she’s more important, he has to keep up this relationship with her moreso than with me. I do not know which way to go – keep talking or walk away & forget it? If I continue this will that keep us together or if I walk away will that end us? I’m in a dilemma as he ignores me a lot when I’m talking, turns his back on me.

*(IGNORES ME FOR HER, MY DILEMMA TO TALK TO HIM OR NOT: This is a review how it was. ‘Talking’ refers to ‘being,’ relating, having a relationship as well as sex. You don’t know which way to go.

ALL THREE TALKING: A triangle or he is relating to two women at the same time but SHE IS MORE IMPORTANT TO HIM AT. THIS TIME.)*

Jackson is wearing a black jacket made of pea-coat material, thick, & it’s shaped kind of draping off the shoulders almost like a cape to his waist or lower – not quite a cape, a bit like a bell coming down, the bottom not tight but loose.

*(BLACK PEA COAT: Navy, ‘a girl in every port,’ sailor’s are notorious for having females wherever they go, so this sounds like ‘what is the next port?–the next woman?’ Being black, it portends the END of something – his present roommate – shaped like a

BELL: ‘Ding dong’ is like a reminder, a notice, an announcement like bells in a Church say time to go there or bells at a wedding saying ‘It is consummated.’ This announces the end of them, beginning of a new relationship with you. You all see the ‘writing on the wall,’ the portent, the prophecy, the next part of life.)*

He seems ANIMATED, I feel uncertain.

(HE SEEMS ANIMATED, I AM UNCERTAIN: This is a big change for him, he’s excited, you were not sure what to do, stay with him or leave.)

SCENE CHANGES

The scene changes. Now we’re in a car where his female is driving,

(HIS FEMALE DRIVING US: This is pivotal, because the situation with his female changes so that he has to or will switch from her to you—she MAKES or DRIVES the two of you to be together.)

Jackson & I are in the back seat with his son to the right of us sitting. Jackson is in front of me, like across my lap, almost taking up the entire back seat in the position he’s in, facing me.

*(HIS POSITION, ACROSS ME IN MY LAP, FACING ME: This is his new SITUATION. He’s now

IN YOUR LAP: means submissive to you, like a lapdog, like a pet or child.

HIS SON TO THE RIGHT: This is probably not a separate person but the child within him being present. It might be a reconciliation or agreement between his Higher Self—in my lap–& his flesh going along or in agreement. Prior to this there had been conflicts (higher conscience vs lower self rebelling.)*

He’s wearing a long-sleeved white cotton shirt & we’re real intimate, myself kissing his arm/body/torso. The feeling of the kisses is DEEP like we are melded, united or like melting into each other, the way you do when you are really close, the energy flowing back & forth like he’s me, I’m him sort of thing. His cotton shirt is designed with these little holes that look like tiny hourglasses, one on top of each other separated by a tiny waist the way an hourglass would have, the holes are only a quarter inch wide – they are embroidered, like having little frames around them. Jackson seems LARGE like he was in the first scene, animated.

*(DEEP, HE’S ME I’M HIM: We are now UNITED in spiritual wedlock, energies interchanged, wills in unison.

WHITE COTTON SHIRT: nuptial garment

HOURGLASSES EMBROIDERED ALL OVER: The time has come, finally. The design being holes rather than something placed on top of the material, say pics of hourglasses, could be saying ‘no sand, it has run out.’)*

He’s talking about some OUTRAGEOUS action that someone ought to do. I scoff at it. I tell him,

“Would you have your son do that? Would you do it yourself?”

When I suggest that it shows how ridiculous this action is but I cannot recall what it was—like a joke but crazy.

(CRAZY ACTION: Seems like a hint about ‘crazy love,’ which is love so intense it doesn’t ‘make sense.’ I was there in the past but I got over it—it might be his turn to feel that way. I am telling him to ‘cool it’ & be rational. He would tell people I was ‘obsessed,’ now it’s his turn maybe.)

Where we’re going is a little mall that has a restaurant. We’re all hungry & looking forward to a meal.

(GOING TO RESTAURANT, ALL HUNGRY: We all need love & emotional nourishment. This little mall reminds me of the one I go to by me – the spot is a grocery store. This symbolizes he will be with me for love/nourishment—she has driven him to me, brought us together by whatever happens to her—her bankruptcy most likely.)

As his gf drives, she’s small in front—he doesn’t talk to her or pay attention to her, only me. I get the feeling that the car is made of a teal color – which is a type of green.

*(SHE’S SMALL HE ONLY PAYS ATTENTION TO ME: She’s no longer important to him, I am. He has his

BACK TO HER, FACING ME: He is finished with her, she’s behind him, but he’s facing me, in my lap even– which means she is done, he’s with me.

TEAL CAR: Teal is green mixed with blue. Her financial condition has crashed, sadness {blue} mixed in to the finances–their situation ends, ours begins—it was predicted a long time, from one POV, survival, but from another, love victorious.)*

College of God & Love, College of Love Making, College of Matriarchal Love, Uncategorized

LOVER’S SALVATION

3-30-20-WAITING IN THE BANK

Dream interpreted for a friend

I am in a bank when John & his friend walk in & through it & both go to the rest room area—somehow although I’m standing right there, they don’t see me. The area they go into is behind a door where both the men’s & women’s rooms are, I believe, & I’m waiting for them to come out & see me—but they never come out.

The layout of the bank is completely PLAIN & so is my outfit. The room of it is about 40-60’ long & maybe 15-20’ wide. The teller is in front behind a waist-high partition. Everything is PLAIN. There is NOTHING in the long room, nothing on the walls – it’s all light colored & that is it.

*(BANK: Place where money is.

LONG ROOM: shape, length of room is like a hall or a tunnel. Notice in this dream, the room is a symbol of a TUNNEL & when John walks through this tunnel–which is darkness & limitation–he doesn’t see THE LIGHT. But when he enters the rest room, I open the door, there is THE LIGHT. He-his mind-is closed, fettered until THE END OF THE TUNNEL & only then does he understand that THIS WOMAN IS THE ANSWER.

PLAIN: everything is plain means it is ‘plain as day,’ not ‘complicated’, easy to see, simple, easy to understand.)*

I’m sort of pacing back & forth. I have on a pure white turtleneck top & dark, maybe black fitted pants. My body is thin & shapely, I have on a nice plain bra, I look good.

In my hands are two things, one, my PURSE which I always carry & two, a spade or hoe {I was messing with these tools yesterday} that is about 1.5’ long & is POINTED.

*(PLAIN OUTFIT, WHITE TURTLENECK, LONG SLEEVES, BLACK PANTS: It’s PLAIN TO SEE that I am a SOURCE OF MONEY (in the bank) & that

WHITE TOP: I am or should be John’s WIFE who will put a roof over his head. The turtleneck & long sleeves means I am completely covered or protected from his hurting me by using me for sex—as I won’t let him have it any more.

BLACK PANTS: not give him sex {or support, money} unless he is with me. {black as in absence or funeral} and I’m in possession of money–

PURSE: possession of money, which I always ‘carry,’ means I always have it, &

SPADE, HOE for GARDENING: this tool is for digging a garden, planting, harvesting, increasing food, resources. It’s a symbol here of INCREASING MONEY. The fact that this is

POINTED: refers to it’s power, effectiveness, like a knife or a tooth, being pointed can GET THROUGH, PIERCE, PENETRATE, where one needs to go or ‘take a bite out of life’. Literally, this spade pierces through the earth to prepare for planting or to take out weeds, but what it stands for is my effectiveness in GAINING MONEY.

BRA, BREASTS: refers to love, the love I have for John.

Everything here is plain to see, obvious, but John walked through here without seeing me which means he did not see what I represent – the remedy to his woes.

PACING BACK & FORTH: frustrated, tired of waiting for him to see me –means this situation–that I can help him in this time of need {if we were together}.)*

I walk, pace, back & forth waiting for John to come out & see me. Finally I open the door in the back to see the area of the rest rooms & all I see is LOTS OF LIGHT coming in through a huge window back there—like daylight, that is it, don’t see John & friend, as if they disappeared. I ponder; did they find a back door there & leave? But then I think that’s not possible, the bank would not have that sort of arrangement as someone could rob the bank & escape easily that way.

*(LIGHT STREAMING IN LIKE DAYLIGHT: This is the ‘light at the end of the tunnel’ which means what, MomGod? Because I see it, but I don’t see him & the friend here, pondering if he left by a back door.

MomGod: No, he did not leave out the back door as you suspected or feared because THERE IS NO BACK DOOR TO A BANK.

BACK DOOR: Escape route, usually represents a secret way of getting into or out of a place or situation {back door lover, doing business ‘back door}. He has no hidden, secret way of getting out of his FINANCIAL CRISIS. A bank is ‘iron clad’ as far as escape routes – there’s only one way in or out, through the front.

Me: Then the Light streaming in here,

LIGHT, AT END OF TUNNEL: A ‘tunnel’ means RESTRICTED, hemmed in, limited, but seeing a light at the end is being saved from something, reprieved, or great hope of it—in this dream it refers to financial salvation, saved from poverty or bankruptcy. John & his friend went to the back to the

REST ROOM AREA: ‘place of rest or relief’ – getting rid of things you don’t want & need, taking a bath or shower, getting clean, brushing teeth—represents hygiene, cleansing & relief–he was looking for REST & RELIEF money wise because THIS IS IN A BANK.

For John, this is the ‘end of the line’ or ‘tunnel,’ he’s in a bank searching for answers – in the dream he doesn’t see you, there is no back door or escape route, but where he went is {as you open the door} flooded with light like

DAYLIGHT, FLOODING IN LIKE: Seeing ‘daylight’ mean becoming aware. Night, darkness, is when you can’t see, but daylight is when all is revealed—you see & understand the situation.

John went here & he did not leave. He SAW THIS LIGHT, this truth, that you are the answer to his dilemma.

Me: But MomGod I did not see John & his friend back here, why not? And who is his FRIEND?

It wasn’t necessary, you saw where he went, where he ended up & there was no other way {back door}—he has no escape route from where he is except you.

FRIEND: The only friend he has is his Guardian Angel, the rest of his friends are demonics, or if not demonics just ordinary people who don’t know their ass from a hole in the ground. It is his guardian angel, to whom you’ve prayed hundreds of times, who’s showing him this vision.)*

{NOTE: This has been predicted for years, but none of us knew how it would transpire. One of my channelers said,

‘He will come to you where he has no place else to go.’

Another psychic said

‘Before he comes to you he has to hit rock bottom.’

None of us knew what rock bottom was.

It’s never been ‘just sex’ I wanted him for – I desired a relationship, I told him so. But he beguiled me for sex while he gave a relationship to someone else. This female he presented on social media as his mate – I got no recognition; he even stopped saying ‘I love you-I want to marry you’ which he did the first few years to me & in front of others. Some people didn’t even believe we were having sex. It hurt, so finally, through some supernatural power I stopped it & then the thing that had also been predicted for years came true, what the Light said was,

“The tables will be turned. He will chase you as you chased him.”

His chase was like ‘guerrilla warfare,’ shooting messages on social media that could be taken more than one way. I knew they were about me, to me, confessions, apologies, regrets, requests, provocations—all to let me know he wanted me, missed me, was sorry & desperate, but he did not do the ONE THING necessary – call me on the phone, like a man, not a mouse, tell me he loved me & wanted to see me, tell me he was planning, preparing for our relationship, that he’d leave the fake one he’d been with for years – a liaison based on partying & popularity—this one crucial thing HE DID NOT DO.

But God works in MYSTERIOUS WAYS. None of us figured on this Pandemic & economic crash. I even asked God if She did this entire crash for me, to bring him to his knees—I asked her as a joke, it seemed so convenient for ME. I was impervious to the crash, but for him it was ‘no more roof over my head.’

This dream explains how God or karma has brought him where he always needed to be but failed to do so instead of listening to God, he obeyed the world, the flesh & the devil. He listened to family & friends who are not of God, may of whom are addicted—some are criminals—some have traumatized him—they tempted him like demons suggesting a bad road, he was deceived, then trapped.}

For years I prayed, did exorcisms for him, said Masses—sent him love for which I got DEMONS bouncing at me. This work exhausted my mind & body. I felt it was finished & LET GO. But how, when, would he ever get out of his situation, that he was entrenched in for YEARS? I could not figure it out, it perplexed my tired brain. I knew he loved me, but WHEN?

Enter the economic catastrophe – something none of us expected. The frail thread that held him & the other female has broken, it was not love, but her support that kept him there—no more support—the place she worked has shut down & when it reopens it might not provide for her–the house of cards is about to collapse.

Interpreted for a friend.

1,121 views