By Rasa Von Werder, April 3rd, 2020







          There was a MOVIE SET I am present at & it is SCARY.


          *(MOVIE SET I AM IN: Theater of life, my life.)*

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          It has something suspended way in the air, as if not attached to anything – a vehicle. Later I see it as attached, & on top is a truck (like you use for hauling, two or three times as big as a pickup truck, its open in back, its painted red, the rest is grey & black. Its suspended way up & precariously angled at a 90 degree downward.


          I think to myself that some crazy guy might get into it & drive it with dire consequences & suddenly someone does. He is in it, gets it started & drives down some kind of ramp—fortunately no accidents occur.

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          *(VEHICLE, TRUCK, PRECARIOUS 90 DEGREE ANGLE: A way given, possibly from Heaven (high above, seemed not attached to the earth but then later you see is attached), that seems scary & dangerous – a way of doing something one needs to do – possibly getting out of a bad situation. It has to do with a male you are concerned about – could be lover Peter who is in dire straits, & it’s scary for him to MAKE A MOVE—but HE DOES IT.


RED TRUCK BEING DRIVEN: person is in a scary, painful situation but boldly makes a move & comes out OK.)*


          This entire thing is a MOVIE SET. What am I doing here? Guess I’m in it. The company has taken over a huge mansion like a palace with ornate interiors – besides the scary contraption we are all in this ornately furnished mansion.

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          *(HUGE MANSION COMPANY HAS TAKEN OVER: Residence is a PLACE OF CONSCIOUSNESS, where one’s mind & heart are – good or bad. To be in a mansion like this is SPIRITUAL GREATNESS or being in a good state – your state. Extreme stress moves one closer to God, we are closer to God when suffering. The


          SCARY CONTRAPTION: is what does one have to do in this time to survive? This Pandemic? Where people are thrown on their ass, without work or money or security? What do they do?)*


          Right now I am outside in a kind of yard, looking into the great mansion as well as an old mansion to the left which is completely decrepit on the outside, falling down walls, roof, all caving in, all made of dark wood, two floors high. It’s on a lot with buildings within 10-15’ of it on all sides with fences or walls up to the second floor – no one seems to notice it but myself.

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          *(DECREPIT MANSION: This is the past relationship between you & lover Peter—it is decrepit, fallen apart, the way it used to be is over, finished. You aren’t ‘there’ any more. 


          WALLS, FENCES HIGH ALL AROUND IT: & no one seems to notice but me, means that no one knew or understood all the great things you had in mind for him, they were & are hidden.)*


          Outside a window is a strange sight – like fifty chairs all fitted into each other sticking out of a window, all completely rusted. I jokingly say to a friend nearby, do you need any chairs?—pointing them out.


         One standout thing is the

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          *(CHAIRS, ALL RUSTY, ABOUT 50, ALL FITTED ONE INTO THE OTHER: Chairs are positions, seats like thrones, places of rest or comfort. They represent the things you wanted for Peter – the accomplishments you would help him attain, the kudos, laurels, successes, all now


          OUT THE WINDOW: meaning over, finished, will not be. It seems like a joke – all you wished for him – as you speak of it to a friend. ‘Rusty’ means it hasn’t been used, didn’t happen.)*

          Another window had other items sticking out, can’t recall what.


        But INSIDE I see ornately carved bureaus, hand carved, some goldeny colored, some darker brown, like new, so ornate I know they would cost a fortune.

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          I think to myself why are those bureaus there, & how could a person get them – valuable, & I don’t understand why they’re in this crumbling, broken down, falling down mansion.


          *(VALUABLE, ORNATE, HAND CARVED BUREAUS, SOME GOLDENY, SOME BROWN: What is LEFT of that relationship is not the outside ambitions you had for him but what was inside, the inner value of the love.


          Bureaus would be things that hold things – these are


CHESTS OF DRAWERS: Chest refers to heart, & the drawers hold many things. This evokes the heart holding many ways of love, the desires to see another happy, whatever it takes. In other words, your heart held for him many ambitions, desires that you thought would bring him the things he wanted – but he did not cooperate, those things are gone. He will not be a ‘somebody,’ in the eyes of the world – he will not ‘succeed’ at any great career, finding fame or recognition.

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But the valuable love is still there wishing to heal him of his maladies, so he can be happy. This you want to retrieve from the failures – take out of that affair what had the deeper meaning.

HAND CARVED: Hands refer to the giving of love.

GOLDENY CHESTS OR BUREAUS: True love, gold is love.

SOME DARKER, BROWN: The dark spots you went through for love have great value, suffering is all we have to give to God – She gives us everything else. {Words of St. Francis of Assisi.})*


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