College of the Gender War, Core Tenets, Shrine to Shakti, Uncategorized

Creed-Doctrine New Religion

The Sisterhood Part 4   

The Matriarchal Creed of our New Religion

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written 12-4&5-22

 

 

I believe in God, the Mother Almighty, Creator of heaven & Earth

And in Rasa Von Werder, one of Her Daughters, & William Bond, one of Her sons, that they were sent to earth to teach Female Empowerment, Matriarchy, & restore worship of God as Mother.

I believe in Matriarchy, Female Empowerment & women running the family & the world.

From Rasa:

After perusing a series of descriptions of CONTEMPLATIVE FEMALE Catholic convents/monasteries I came to the conclusion that some of them fit into this category:

From Wikipedia:

The Diogenes Club is a fictional gentlemen’s club created by Sir Arthur Conan Doyle and featured in several Sherlock Holmes stories, such as 1893′s “The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter“. It seems to have been named after Diogenes the Cynic (though this is never explained in the original stories) and was co-founded by Sherlock’s indolent elder brother Mycroft Holmes.

The club as described by Sherlock Holmes in “The Adventure of the Greek Interpreter“:

There are many men in London, you know, who, some from shyness, some from misanthropy, have no wish for the company of their fellows. Yet they are not averse to comfortable chairs and the latest periodicals. It is for the convenience of these that the Diogenes Club was started, and it now contains the most unsociable and unclubbable men in town. No member is permitted to take the least notice of any other one. Save in the Stranger’s Room, no talking is, under any circumstances, allowed, and three offences, if brought to the notice of the committee, render the talker liable to expulsion. My brother was one of the founders, and I have myself found it a very soothing atmosphere. {end Wikipedia part}

 

          The convents are tiny, usually housing 1 to 9 women at most. They do not reach out to the world, they have no separate doctrine from the Catholic Church & they live under the auspices of it. Often you see an image of the nuns surrounding a Priest, who presumably is their LEADER or the one who authorizes their existence, certainly hearing their confessions & providing them with the HOLY EUCHARIST which they themselves feel they cannot consecrate.

          There is nothing here that can inform me, teach me or inspire me in the work that I must do to empower women & bring forth a religion positive to the female gender & its authority, in fact, they present a sorry example of compliance to Patriarchy. I move on from them.

 

          About Gerald Gardner, founder of a modern day Wicca movement from Wikipedia:

 

          Gerald Brosseau Gardner (13 June 1884 – 12 February 1964), also known by the craft name Scire, was an English Wiccan, as well as an author and an amateur anthropologist and archaeologist. He was instrumental in bringing the Contemporary Pagan religion of Wicca to public attention, writing some of its definitive religious texts and founding the tradition of Gardnerian Wicca.   {end Wikipedia part}

 

          {There are also other forms of Wicca, called Dianic Wicca or by other names}.

          This example exonerates the male gender from participation in the founding of our religion/Sisterhood, pointing out that gender alone is not the criteria for establishing us. We have many men that have helped formed our religion including the likes of Jesus Christ, all his great Saints, Buddha & all his great saints, & many other men who believe/ed in Matriarchy, Female Empowerment & right now, my two best friends, William Bond & Pete Jackson, are of this number.

          It is important to stress the SPIRIT of Matriarchy, as taught by Jesus & others, which is the Spirit of Divine Motherhood, that of loving & caring for others. Whoever espouses this Spirit is a Matriarch, a Christian, a Buddhist, Good Wiccan or Pagan or any other religion that is Good as taught by these Great Souls.

          Jesus taught Matriarchy overtly & distinctly, he even cited he wanted to be a Mother Hen to his followers, the baby chicks under his wings.

          Buddha taught his followers to pray daily for ALL SENTIENT BEINGS & that INCLUDES ANIMALS. I am all for that.

          Gerald Gardner promoted a religion rooted in the ancient days when women ruled the world. He had to scrounge to find traces of Wicca/Paganism not wiped out through the Patriarchy, its Inquisition, & its Patriarchal Academics. All the Patriarchal Institutions – religions & Universities, have been enemies of Female Empowerment & the Matriarchal agenda. They have sought to wipe out all traces of HER-story & those who wish to restore it must dig deep. Gerald studied, researched & participated in ancient cults in order to understand what once had been.

          Yes he was a man, not a woman. Why didn’t a woman do what he did? Shall we blame him for that or simply accept him as a Matriarch?

          Here is a distinction: a Matriarch is recognized not by the body but by the Spirit. Some men are more Matriarchal than some women. I had many women enemies s- believe it or not – trying to separate me from William Bond, claiming he had to submit to THEIR authority! And they disrespected him instead of kneeling at his feet doctrine wise. Here William is the Prophet of Matriarchy, & they were attacking him.

They also, of course, attacked me vehemently out of jealousy, the crazed thought that I was ‘trying to take over’ & they deserved accolades more so than I. These women who attacked either William or myself were NOT Matriarchs. Call them whatever you wish, but they did not assist Female Empowerment.

When it came time to REAL WORK on our agenda, the women became SCARCE. When it was time to take the dole, they were all over the place. They stood in lie when I handed out praise & attention to them. When it came time to do research, write articles, build websites, they disappeared.

One is following in my footsteps, & I am proud of her work. But she has distanced herself from me – I have no idea why.

Bottom line is men can be more Matriarchal than women, they can help, they are helping. But that doesn’t mean that men can, in general or at random, influence this doctrine toward Patriarchy. We make a fine distinction between help & infiltration, between sincere members & agents provocateur.

This will require great discernment & it will come from the Holy Spirit.

There will be men, even agencies, with all kinds of offers. Some of these will be sincere, some not so. Beware of Greeks bearing Gifts. The famous ‘Trojan Horse’ was built with soldiers inside, when the city carted the horse in, the soldiers popped out, attacked & defeated the citizens.

There are those who want to join, infiltrate, suck up, flatter, lie, to get inside our heads, our lives, our Order, with only the intent of using us or even betraying us.

For example, a female who intends to make money from Scandal Sheets might join our Order for a ‘visitor’ status, to see if she wants to be a ‘nun’ or Matriarch.

She stays two weeks only to SPY & find every detail she can to TWIST it against our favor, the minutest molehill will turn into a mountain, ridicule & contempt are her goal.

How do we know such a person before we let her in? Discernment – prayer.

“By their fruits he shall know them”

I have had many people on social media who wanted to be ‘friends’ with me, but these friendships carried a PRICE TAG. In the end, it is THEIR NEEDS not those of the Religion, the Order, the Cause, the Matriarchy they were after. They wanted to use my prestige, fame, status in the community, to build themselves up, for what reason I’m not even sure.

They wanted the so-called GLORY, not the sweat & blood, the REWARDS, not the pain.

What is the sweat & blood & pain & what are the rewards?

They imagined accolades, respect & love. Lol. There is a dearth of that. You work & your rewards are in HEAVEN, the eternal sphere. When you die your radiance in Heaven will be brighter than it would have been. There isn’t any Heaven on Earth, there will always be pain, if you’re waiting for that, you will find dirt in your mouth at the end of the rainbow.

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Doctrine of the Matriarch Religion

 

What we MUST believe even though there is a soft boundary between ourselves & many other religions, there will be points where there is an IRON FENCE between us & them.

Here is where we will not change. In any point of doctrine where Patriarchy assumes leadership or puts women down or stands above women, we reject that completely. Any system which in any way wants to lead women, be above them, have greater rights, claims that God is a man, that the Priests have to be men, etc, we reject all that.

For example, Mormons might be wonderful people & we love them for loving God. But when they say their founder saw some sort of writing that no one could read but him & this writing told him men should be leaders & have multiple wives, forget that. That is against us.

And Jehovah’s Witnesses, they are wonderful people & we love them. But when they say women cannot preach in Kingdom Hall, & all the leaders are men, we defy that doctrine & say this is not for us.

And the cults like Mennonites & Hutterites which are all-male leaders & Patriarchs, some of them might be saints, but we reject Patriarchal Societies.

Then, what does a Matriarch {the name of our New Religion} have to espouse? {BTW, this is written by Rasa Von Werder. Where William Bond has differences of opinion, you choose which one you wish to follow, but the Sisterhood must believe Rasa Von Werder’s version.}

 

I That God is a Mother God, Her symbol is female & rightfully so because the woman is the egg & reproductive, the sperm is not

 

2        That females should run the family & the world. That men have done a terrible job of running the world & should step aside.

 

3        That human men are going extinct. They are a ‘genetic experiment that did not work & nature is removing them.’ It will be a woman-only world in 100k years or so, women will reproduce without men, the offspring all female. {See the teaching of Dr. Bryan Sykes, world’s leading geneticist, on this} {Rasa Von Werder gives her theory elsewhere how men evolved & became negative as shown in the myth of Lucifer-to-Satan with one third of the angels following him into Hell}

 

4        That animals are Sacred & should not be exploited in a cruel manner or hunted for sport. That vegetarianism & veganism should be encouraged, that humans who eat meat should eat less of it. Animals that are housed for human exploitation will be monitored for good conditions, the most humane housing, feed & treatment. Animals deserve freedom, happiness & fulfillment as much as humans do. We are another species of animal, ‘Whatever you do to the least of these you do to Me’ says God.

 RASA54 RASA51 RASA52 RASA50 RASA45 RASA45 X RASA44

5        Children should be breast fed up to 6 years, when the immune system is fully developed. Women should not have a second child until the first is weaned, after six years. To have serial pregnancies causes trauma in a child because they have to be weaned & the mother pays less attention to the first toddler. Serial pregnancies are forced upon women by men, it has caused overpopulation & disastrous consequences to our planet. {See the teachings of Dr. Bryan Sykes on this in his book “Adam’s Curse – A Future Without Men} The care, raising of children should be managed by women only, as they have the instinct for it, they should not surrender the authority over their children to men, – they are designated by God & biology to be the caregivers. Child abuse is primarily caused by males – this must be addressed seriously. Women must have financial independence from men to take care of the children without them if they are abusive to them or the children.

 

6        Sexuality – In general, sex between consenting adults is not a sin. However, there could be instances of sin during sex, to be decided by God alone, not society, as God knows the hearts & minds & circumstances. Anything, even a biological act, committed to hurt someone can be a sin. Nudity is also perfectly innocent, unless someone is using it unfairly, such as a man exposing himself to a woman or child against their will. Think like a nudist, do not be scandalized by nudity in general, it does not represent immorality.

 

Let us take note that the sex laws & attitudes have been aimed primarily against women.   Women are free to do with their bodies as they wish, no man can dictate what to do, what is moral or immoral, that she is less of a human because she chooses t have many partners. She is FREE.

 

7        Reproductive rights are purely the decision of the female. She should use birth control of any type when she wishes to. Abortion is up to her, but to be avoided by using birth control whenever possible, especially condoms. In our Sisterhood, women are sexually free but we want to protect them as parents protect their daughters. We plan to screen the men who want to be in association with us & cohabit with our members, to make sure our Sisters are not hurt. But if Sisters want to ‘have fun’ by having sex with any men they choose, they are allowed. We hope they stay within the community & their children will be a part of our Religion & Sisterhood.

RASA43 RASA41 RASA40 RASA39 RASA37 RASA38 RASA36 

Catholics & Muslims have used child bearing as a way of increasing their numbers, successfully so. The Catholic Church heinously forbids birth control, in an age when AIDS exists & women can be killed by it. We reject their rule. Muslims do not allow birth control at all – there are no condoms sold in Dubai. I have a lady friend who lives there. The lack of using birth control is a strong Patriarchal ploy AGAINST WOMEN. They use it to keep female ‘barefoot & pregnant’ – “from the bedroom to the kitchen’. When women are alone in a nuclear family & they have children, they find it difficult to navigate elsewhere, they are tied down. Child care is expensive. I did it, I raised a child alone while working & paid for child care – we remained in poverty the entire time, it was hard.

 

When we disregard the ‘nuclear family’ as the idea & try living as Sisters, as both William & I agree, child rearing becomes more easier. Obviously, a woman can leave the community & go out, be it work, shopping or recreation, & leave her children in the care of Sisters. You can’t do this in a nuclear family. The male might be working, he could be dangerous alone with the child, or he could be just incompetent as a care giver. No, in a nuclear setting, the woman is strapped & imprisoned by children. A Sisterhood is strongly empowering to a woman.

 

8        A woman must believe in HERSELF, that God is within her, that she has authority over herself, her life & her children. She must walk like a Godess, talk like a Godess, act like a Godess. She must have dignity & pride. And she cannot afford to be ‘feminine’ in the bad sense of the word, as that is what they want, for us to be weak, passive, wishy washy, dependent, submissive & soft. If we want to be feminine in the POSITIVE way, gentle, kind & caring, we can only afford to be so in the company of men who are gentlemen or model people, the rest will SLAUGHTER us – like they slaughtered the Indians, Aborigines & Indigenous Peoples.

 

A woman MUST RESPECT HERSELF & OTHER WOMEN. She must not be in conflict or competition with them – the ‘slave mentality.’ We are NOT slaves of men, we are capable of taking care of ourselves but we must BELIEVE in ourselves & OUR GOD.

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College of Matriarchal Love, College of the Gender War, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Sisterhood Pt 3

The Sisterhood 12-3-22

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          From William Bond

Hi Rasa

I agree with what you are trying to achieve but there are a few things I want to say about it. Yes sisterhood is needed but the problem is that a strong sisterhood can be defeated by an army of violent men. So if we want women to rule our world we have to find ways to overcome masculine power. 

 

Patriarchy v Matriarchy is not the same as men v women. I have pointed out before that men can be very submissive. We not only find this in the femdom scene but also in the military and in slavery. It is easy for the military to brainwash men to fight in wars and sacrifice their lives doing this. And it is men’s submissive nature that allows a few patriarchal rulers to rule society. For instance the power of a dictator depends on an army of young men who will give him total obedience and arrest and murder anyone who resists the power of the dictator. 

 

So the paradox is that men seem to rule the world not because they are the dominant sex but because they are naturally submissive and will obey whatever patriarchal leaders tell them to do. So the true battle is between women and a small patriarchal ruling elite. Ordinary men are just the soldiers of the patriarchy and do as they are told. 

 

The point is that if we were to have a Matriarchal world women have to take away the power that the ruling elite have over men and become the rulers of men themselves. The ruling elite control men through propaganda and brainwashing. They indoctrinate men to believe they must be ‘macho’ and that they are the natural dominant sex.  And at the same time they also indoctrinate women to believe they are the natural submissive sex. 

 

So it is basically a war of mind-control where patriarchy brainwashes people into believing that men should rule the world.  But as in all patriarchal societies it is only and handful of men who rule most men do as they are told. 

 

This means that if women are to rule our world then women have to find ways of controlling men. I agree sisterhood is very important for this, because if women do not help and support each other they won’t accomplish anything. But women have to accept that men do have a submissive nature and will obey those they believe are in authority over them. Because whomever the majority of men obey, are the rulers of the world.  William

 

Rasa answers: OK, I understand. Whoever exerts authority, the men will obey. So will the women.

          I am doing what I believe has to be done. I am helping women believe in themselves & other women. I will assist them to hold their head up high, to walk like a Godess, to think like a Godess & act like a Godess. Remember how the Black Muslims trained their men to hold their heads up high with white men & women. I noticed they were cold hearted to me, like when I asked one for subway directions, he ignored me & took his sweet time. He was showing that he was not ‘Mr Nice Guy’, not eager to please, he was trying to ‘stand tall’ & not want to help – this made him feel stronger.

          I will do my best to indoctrinate women to feel God’s Power, to show God’s Power, not to be underlings of men, not to act dependent to men – do all the things the opposite of what patriarchy has taught them. Don’t laugh at their jokes, don’t act submissive or weak. Act strong. You are not dependent on them, they are dependent on you. This is just the beginning, I will write more on it.

1506638_421551001322149_1411068702_n 969770_277749732364517_856706315_n 969347_277749982364492_1619494441_n 992815_277750215697802_1409798812_n 1004927_628399200527007_1115218157_n 1013795_594663333900594_752333416_n BETTER SHOT 

From William, he continues his first letter – Hi Rasa:

I have been thinking more about your sisterhood project and this morning I got another idea about it. Recently I saw a documentary film by Cara Delevingne, called “Planet Sex”. She makes the point that men nearly always achieve orgasm when they have sex but officially 60% of women don’t (Cara Delevingne believes that the true number is a lot less than that). Apparently Cara Delevingne is bi-sexual

and she claims she ends up having more sex with women because sex with women is a lot better as she can always achieve an orgasm with another woman.

 

She then goes into recent German scientific research where they discovered that when people masturbate or have sex to orgasm the brain is flooded with good feeling chemicals called  Endocannabinoids which are very similar to Cannabis. Now, this is interesting as the one example of sisterhood working is the Bononbo ape who has be called the “make love not war” ape. 

 

Sex is very important to the Bonobo’s social structure where females bond through sex and use it to defuse  male aggression. Now, what is interesting about patriarchy is that it is anti-sexual. Even today masturbation is still discouraged, and for most of it’s history homosexuality was also discourage and even criminalized. This makes sense because if it is easier for women to achieve sexual satisfaction through lesbian sex, so women like bonobos can use sex to bond with each other and create a powerful sisterhood. 

 

Another point is that if sex floods the brain with good feeling chemicals then this might be why sex is a way to defuse male aggression. Men only become violent and aggressive when they are upset, but if they have sex then they are going to feel better about everything and not want to go and hurt someone else. This then is probably why patriarchy doesn’t like sex because if they have frequent sex with women or even other men, then they are less likely to became aggressive and violent.

 

The only problem with this, is that by discouraging men to have sex patriarchy has made men more aggressive and can use these aggressive men to fight wars to conquer other more peaceful countries. But perhaps modern warfare might be a solution to this, as war is increasingly fought with technology and the side that has the better technology is more likely to win which means countries may not need aggressive sex-starved men to fight wars any more.    William

 

Rasa responds to this previous letter:

          Sex is a huge issue because it means so much in our lives, it is probably 2nd or 3rd in importance for survival, we cannot live without love, & sex is part of physical closeness, which means love.

          In the tests made of Harlow’s monkeys, as explained by Dr. Prescott, when a baby monkey had a choice between food or holding a fake surrogate Mom – an object covered with fur – it chose the object. To cling to the Mother figure was even more important than physical food. How does this relate to sex? Sex & love are similar. ‘Sex’ begins by closeness to care giver. Without it, people become sexually dysfunctional or inept.

          We cannot live without love, we have to get it somewhere. Love is nourishment.

          Sex is that – it is nourishment. It feeds the body, the hormones, as you explain here. Feel good hormones make life livable, without them, people become suicidal.

          As far as the patriarchal attitude toward sex being negative there are 2 factors or more. One is they made sex repressive to control women – double standard proves it. Men have few morals re sex, they don’t give a shyt what the codes are. Women are punished for having sex. And second, whatever is prohibited you can sell – so sex & drugs are ‘illegal’, you make money on them. If sex was a free-for-all they could not make money selling it.

          And it’s important to remember. When sex for women becomes free, when women do whatever they wish re sex, men will lose ALL THERE POWER. There will be nothing to fight for. They will have to obey women.

          Our Sisterhood is just ONE SEED. But it needs to be a perfect seed, a good, healthy one. Jesus ministered a mere 3 years in Israel. His life there was a PERFECT SEED, & see how it grew.

          And nothing about it was easy, neither his life nor the aftermath. My life has been pretty hard & maybe the beginning of our Order will be, but that doesn’t mean it will be defeated. Let us create the perfect seed & it will be watered by our human efforts & God’s Grace. Rasa

         

 

From Rasa:

 

Very good train of thought William.  You have your meditation cap on.

 

I will respond soon.

 

I think Pete will be able to respond to these new ideas you’ve presented also.

 

I am up & about now & eager to move forward.

 

We will have an Anthem,

 

America the Beautiful (O Beautiful for Spacious Skies)

Song by Michael W. Smith

… O beautiful for spacious skies
For amber waves of grain
For purple mountain majesties
Above the fruited plain!

… America! America! God shed His grace on thee
And crown thy good with brotherhood
From sea to shining sea

 

to ‘The Sisterhood, the Sisterhood, God shed Her Grace on thee - 

& beyond that I need my web man, who I’ll give $100 to, to help write the lyrics.  He’s an expert.  The lyrics are copyrighted but I don’t think you can copyright MELODIES 

 

Another song we used to sing in Girl Scouts, words changed to the tune of ‘Let me call you sweetheart’

 

“Let me call you SISTER I’m a MATRIARCH too

Let me hear you whisper all the MATER RULES

Keep the SPIRIT GLOWING

And your heart SO PURE

Let me call you SISTER I’m a MATRIARCH too”

RASATUBE254 RASATUBE253 RASATUBE252 RASATUBE251 RASATUBE250 RASATUBE249 RASATUBE248 RASATUBE255 

As Scouts we said,

Let me call you sister
I’m a Girl Scout too.
Let me hear you whisper
All the Scout Laws through.
Keep your Girl Scout Promise,
In your heart so true,
Let me call you sister,
I’m a Girl Scout too.

 

We must SING TOGETHER to life our hearts & minds to Mother God & respect for other women     Rasa

 

From Pete Jackson:

Very well-said as usual, William.  Dr. James W. Prescott made a similar observation if I remember correctly, but I think you articulated it even better IMHO.  The bonobos have the right idea overall.  Prescott notes that the pleasure circuits of the brain are almost entirely mutually exclusive with the violence and pain circuits in the brain, and the patriarchy knows that all too well.  Of course, patriarchy has attempted to hack that as well by deliberately mixing sex with violence to get both men and Women to associate one with the other.  That is where we get various perversions and depravities like rape, sexual assault, violent/coercive sadomasochism, choking, and “rough sex”, and the male-dominated porn that blatantly glorifies these things.  But the patriarchy does not want integrative pleasure, only neurodissociative pleasure at best while sacralizing pain and violence.  Eros is bad, while Thanatos is good, according to their twisted logic.  Pain is a virtue, and pleasure is a vice.  No wonder people who grow up steeped in that evil system are so overwhelmingly messed up!

 

http://www.violence.de/

 

This logic also carries over to psychoactive drugs as well.  Patriarchy has historically preferred ones that paradoxically promote aggression while also keeping their users stupefied, quiescent, and dependent enough for the powers that be to control them (alcohol, various hard drugs, amphetamines, Ritalin, SSRIs, etc.), all while trying to stamp out any substances that discourage aggression and/or promote thinking for oneself (cannabis, psychedelics, etc.).  And patriarchy has preferred concentrated or synthetic drugs rather than natural botanical drugs.

 

As the late great Buckminster Fuller said, “either war is obsolete, or man is”.  Most wars today are imperialistic wars of conquest, and with today’s technology (both a blessing and a curse at the same time) we need far less “cannon fodder” than in the past to get the same results.

 

The film “Planet Sex” by Cara Delevigne I have not seen, but I will check it out.  What first came to my mind was a book that I recently heard about but still have yet to read:  The Pleasure Gap by Katherine Rowland.

 

https://www.amazon.com/Pleasure-Gap-American-Unfinished-Revolution-ebook/dp/B07RKW3FZ7

 

Best wishes,  Pete

 

From Rasa:

OK Pete, I am keeping these letters for further discussion & here is one I just wrote to an amazing female – she has a popular site on You tube called ‘Girl in the Woods’.

If I can get her interested in our Sisterhood it would be a plus.  I will reach out to all likely candidates for participation.  Just like I used to for my work, in the past – & when you reach out to EVERYONE you are bound to get SOMEONE.  She all her life has been active in the rugged outdoor life, even participated in one tough survivalist TV show – Brooke Whipple.  My letter:

 

Hi there Beautiful Great Women, aka ‘Girl in the Woods’

 

                I have studied your biographical video & have lots of respect for you.  Thanks for keeping me informed.

 

                I have been kept busy writing my auto-biography & just published the NINTH volume, ten coming up.

 

                Am beginning to write all the precepts for a new SISTERHOOD that will be part of our NEW RELIGION FOR WOMEN.  It is a college, ashram, convent, domicile, lifestyle, POV,

Order with our own Temple to Mother God {where males are not admitted except on special days by invite.}

 

                It is Female Empowerment.  One idea where you ‘fit in’ is we will have Mother God Scouts.  We will learn all we can & practice OUTDOOR LIFE & even survival, like Girl Scouts, & maybe include some Wicca celebrations along with it but not exclusively.  This needs to be thought out, what things we do but camping, campfires, fishing, swimming, hiking, collecting herbs & mushrooms & learning all about outdoor foraging – all that you do is on the agenda.  One of the important precepts here is female COMARADERIE as I experienced in Girl Scouts – {one of the happiest times of my life.}

 

    Men are not excluded completely even though our focus is on women – We will have shindigs every 2 weeks, dances, where we meet candidates for friends & lovers  -  the females are totally liberated sex wise.  The men are, however, screened for security reasons.  They must have clean backgrounds & straight up characters.

 

    I have published a book for our New Religion – it’s a START, called ‘Woman Thou Art God’ & have a website by that name which has been active since 2004, used to get a million views a year.

 

    Here is the link to my books, there are around 30, published on Lulu & dozens of Internet venues:

        https://www.lulu.com/spotlight/rasavonwerder?gclid=CjwKCAjwyaWZBhBGEiwACslQo0AoJTM81ErfVPXrBaH1ptKYPi9gJs2NyhN5X06u5gGPS9MsD2KySBoCGbsQAvD_BwE

 

      The members of our religion are called MATRIARCHS.

 

      Signing off for now, wishing you God speed & Mother God luck with all your new endeavors.

                            Rasa Von Werder

 

From Rasa: My continued thoughts, some of which I got yesterday but had no time to write them down.

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Beware of VAMPIRES

 

You‘ve heard the term ‘psychic vampire?’ – There’s also Narcissist & ego maniac. It needs to be addressed, because as an Order which will now reach out into local & international humanity, we will be confronted by ALL TYPES & one of the types we must AVOID & CANNOT have within our midst, neither up close nor anywhere in our association at all is the VAMPIRE. So what is a vampire & how do we recognize one?

 

A vampire is one who is PERMANENTLY sunk down in the flesh. The flesh includes ego – & let us make a distinction here between people being TEMPORARILY sunk down & permanently so, where they cannot leave the flesh no matter what the conditions, their brain works in a sort of ‘loop’ where even when the outside status improves, or even if they presumably TRY to think some other way, they end up at the same ballpark or home plate – MYSELF, my body, my needs, my flesh. Mind you – these people CANNOT CHANGE like the devil CANNOT repent. They might be mentally ill or psychotic. What causes this I will not even try to understand because I can’t & I am not a psychiatrist or psychologist who is paid to look into such matters.

I can explain WHAT IT IS, not WHY it is & advise to stay away as far away as possible from these people, not to even think, consider or pray for them as doing so brings them closer to us; they invade our minds like a disease that travels through walls & skulls – I will give examples.

But first, let me explain a few pointers. One, we are or most of us, riveted in the flesh as infants or small kids – We cannot be contemplatives or mind wizards when we’re little. Some might have tendencies, like Jesus age 12 taught the rabbis in the Temple – but they aren’t yet fully developed.

It’s a sign of immaturity to be focused in the flesh – St. Paul said ‘When I was a child, I spake as a child’ & then he grew up & spoke as an adult. This frame of mind is simple, natural immaturity & we mustn’t be hard on the young.

But hopefully we grow out of this, we gain compassion, empathy, caring for others as we do ourselves. But some people don’t grow up, they remain infantile their whole life until the day they die – they cannot think of anything but themselves.

Now mind you, there is TEMPORARY focus in the flesh. When we are TRAUMATIZED or SICK or suffer BEREAVEMENT or any kind of ANXIETY or SORROW we can, for a time, sink down into our lower nature. But we get over it & spring back into our MIND, HIGHER NATURE, contemplation & clear thought.

For examples. I was in contemplation until God told me to go back in the world & have FUN. I DID SO & sunk down into my flesh as I was involved with people with my body & emotions, & it is impossible to stay contemplative while carousing with people & having sex. I notice my mental work suffered. I had been writing hundreds of articles on my blog prior to this & suddenly – boom – nearly NOTHING for years, until I quit going out. It was partially involvement, partially physical exhaustion as if you go to bars Friday & Saturday, involvement of talking, maybe having sex, drinking, you will not recover until the end of Sunday, you might have a few days of clarity, then the murk once again. St. Thomas famously said lust causes blindness of the mind. I am a strong mind, so I was not completely wiped out. For the average person who has no mental abilities they go from plateau to pit, I went from mountain to valley, not the total pit. But when I broke all my ties with ‘downtown’ & ‘lover’ this happened: My emotions stopped dwelling in the physical flesh, my own & that of others. I was released like a balloon to ascend back into Higher Self, the Self of God, the Higher Mind. I regained my peace, serenity, composure & was able to see again not the trees, but the whole forest. My VISION came back; it wasn’t impaired any more. It took more than a year to readjust.

Then there are distractions of days or weeks, even months. Recently I had a couple traumas. One, a female & an accomplice started writing me letters pretending to be my long-lost granddaughter. This upset me so much it was eleven days unable to think or write – that being solved, I returned to work.

And when I had trouble a week ago publishing my last book – not my fault but the system – for a few days I had anxiety that disabled my mind. But that was also temporary.

Like I said, if outside forces tweak us the wrong way, if our emotions are punched out or called upon strongly, we can get focused away from a higher place, only thinking about the trouble. But this will pass; we must excuse & forgive when someone is temporarily troubled & not condemn or reject them for this.

I am NOT talking about youth-immaturity or temporary states, I am talking about people whose character is vampirish & who cannot, will not change. It’s like thieves. People are BORN thieves, they never change. If you see someone is a thief, just know it’s inborn-inbred, & don’t expect them to change their mind & go straight.

OK so let me get to my recent experiences with VAMPIRES.

I know two such females nearby. To show how dangerous & pervasive they are – I have not been friends with either one of them for MANY YEARS. But recently both came to my attention.

One of them, as I checked her social media daily – because I had to – I felt SICK of mind & heart. The feeling stayed in me like a stomach ache. I wasn’t talking to her, just read her media, & the VIBRATION affected me. This is, like I said, like a DISEASE that goes through walls & skulls. I noticed her DELUSIONS & now saw them coming ‘home’ to roost, a living breating TWISTED mind set. To see her psychosis so tangible was a Hellish sight. I felt FEAR like a legion of demons was reaching me.

The other female I have not spoke with for 25 years but she came to my attention. She apparently saw I had written my life – she was always imitating me in the most extreme way – & decided to write hers.

And so I went to see what she had to say through the ‘Look inside’ feature & as I continued to read I felt SICK. ‘Delusions of grandeur’ is a mental illness. And as I read, I got her vibes, they haunted me the rest of the day & night. I had to quit & forget her to cut off the dis-ease reaching me. And I note just now, it also gave me a sense of FEAR, like I was being affected by that LEGION of demons. I didn’t fear the person, in both cases, I feared the demonic reaching me.

This is a lesson that when we meet these VAMPIRES they must not only be prevented from living with us, they cannot be Third Order or affiliated in any way where we have to THINK about them. It has to be a TOTAL SEPARATION, the same as with the demonic – because this IS demonic.

No, we cannot be  FRIENDS with EVERYONE. We must be selective, careful, judicious to who we associate with. The great exorcist Bob Larson teaches a course that I took. He explains that when we associate with people as lovers, friends or business partners we receive all that is in them, including their DEMONS! Take notice of that!

Just a couple snippets & we are done. My lady friend took in foster children to make extra cash. She got this girl who was a total sex maniac, haha, but that was not the main problem. She said the girl would ask her questions from morning to night until she was totally drained. People can, in the guise of being nice, or doing the right thing, can call on your energies so much they drain you of them, it’s vampirism disguised as being good. I had a cleaning lady like that. The minute she walked in she couldn’t just look around & see what had to be done, she kept asking me with every tiny chore, ‘What do you want me to do now?’ I couldn’t get anything done as she was talking to me constantly, I couldn’t write, I couldn’t pray.

That was my problem on the internet with ‘slaves’ or ‘disciples.’ They would do things for me & demand my attention constantly. I was better off with them NOT doing me any ‘favors!’ Then they’d play games like let me see other women they were talking to, trying to make me jealous. It was a total waste of time, attention & energy.

And that brings me to some of the questions William raised, about the needs of men, sexual & otherwise, & when they don’t get these met, they get violent, aggressive & dangerous. I will address those issues inside his letters.

It is VERY IMPORTANT as we build the sisterhood, to beware of VAMPIRES. And be vigilant when they appear in the guise of being good. Anyone that demands INORDINATE amounts of attention is wrong. We are not raising babies or running a lunatic asylum. The closer they are to us, the more mature & together they must be. If they need serious growing up but have potential, put them further away & let them grow. No more questions, lol.

 

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

YOUNG HUSBAND TRAGEDY

Chapter 3    MY SPIRITUAL HUSBAND NICK

– DEATH FANTASIES

written late Nov 2022

12814194_ ITHACA 4 10 17 POST 14724509_ 147311 MAY 6 22 

         Pics above:  His crew at a place he was a dishwasher – not saying they were bad guys – I didn’t know them – And the x’d pic, how he saw himself

This is the young husband who loved me & I him. We were mystically married – which I shall explain. He lived two lives. To the world he presented a façade or charade – Living with a woman who was one of many, but portrayed as the ‘one & only’ wife together with a bevy of ‘friends’ – all focused on drugs.

 

Posted on Face Book under dates stated – 2022

 

His SoundCloud music under “Nick Lambo13”

 

Words gleaned from his song, not exact, verses repeated, hard to understand all the words {His words will be in bright blue}:

 

“Death callin’ my name, they wantin’ my body

doin’ drugs, feelin’ numb

Mentally fucked up

Mind is broken

Devil right beside me

Early grave

My life – you can take it

Havin’ death fantasies

My life – you can take it

Devil keeps talkin’ beside me

My heart’s frozen

No one to lean on”

 

ME: This is NOT A HAPPY MAN. Look, it doesn’t take a rocket scientist to see the DESPAIR in these words. Why despair? I was gone, he didn’t know what to do, or if he did, he was too weak. And that became obvious when he finally called me June 2, 2022. His crazy ‘friends’ keep all talking now, hundreds of them, about him on his FB. They think they were so important to him. It was surface relationships – I’ve been there. I had thousands of ‘face book’ friends. When I left FB only 3 of them are still my friends. Yes, he saw them in person but it was for things that kids do – playing – & partying with drugs & alcohol & dope. It was a substance-induced charade. They all miss the theater of drugs with Nick – he was their

star. Star gone, no more fun. That’s what they miss. They were not on God’s side, trying to save him, just wanting to have fun with him.

 

Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

July 25

 Check it out!!!!!

Death Fantasies out now!!!!!!

 

Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

July 21

Cause if I don’t say it all here I won’t say nothing

 

Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

July 11

I love that I literally made this for me myself it’s like making a painting that you have no plans on letting go that’s what this basically is just something for myself to go back on and I love it and that’s all that matters about this one!!!!!

Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

 July 8  He says:

“If the devil can’t get close to you he’ll take what mattered most to you so he can watch you fight your demons everyday”

 

ME: He’s talking about the devil taking me from him – You ask what mattered to him the most? The True Love of a Mother that I gave him – I was the only one he looked to that way. His ‘friends’ wanted to believe how important they were. Yes, he drugged & partied with them, it was substance-induced joy or happiness, not real. The only REAL LOVE he had was from me. Unconditional love, not using him as a drug partner or entertainment object. Just wanted to save him but I was blocked.

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Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

June 25

Pick a side you gotta follow when that casket ride
-XoX
#DeathFantasies

 

June 5 & June 9 – May 28 – May 27 – May 24 he announces his SoundCloud rap song:

 

XoXNicky – Overcame it all

 

This rap is about how he OVERCAME NOT HAVING ME ANY MORE {I was absent from the scene & he wasn’t man enough to contact me until it was TOO LATE. But he suffered like a dog, his songs say so, my dreams vividly portray it. Instead of doing the right thing – calling me & speaking to me sanely, he mollified himself with MORE DRUGS – which finally killed him. The reason I know this is about me is because after I messaged him on FB through a friend, he said something like, ‘Now she contacts me, after I overcame it all, she should have made her moves sooner, now its too late’ – words approximate. He said this in a post as well as in his songs.}

 

Nicholas Anthony VanDunk

Dec 18, 2021   He says:

“A psychic said I’d die at 28 in three hours we will cheers to 29 ”

 

ME: The psychic was not far off, it was 6 months later, Aug 14, 2022, he died.

I told him dozens of times he was on the road to an early death due to drugs. Every person who channeled for me agreed with me – half a dozen people. This would have been averted had he quit drugs. But he was too comfortable with his enabler & all their ‘friends.’

The demons had possessed him. I knew about July 2022, had the strong feeling ‘It’s over. This time was mystically relevant because we met in July & every July – my birthday, by chance or fate, we’d always have a tryst. This ended after 2019. Why? Because it was time for him to stand up to the plate & hit the ball – but he was too slow. Our relationship is over, it’s done. Nothing can be fixed any more.’ It wasn’t just our relationship, his LIFE depended on it – if he did not come to me he was doomed by drugs, & he wasn’t moving toward me although we reconciled, & then it happened.

 

OK I am worn out from going through hundreds of his FB pages. Now it flipped back to the front & it’ll take 10 minutes to scroll back down, so I’m not going to do it, I have work to do.

Suffice to say that in the last times after he wasn’t seeing me any more, he spoke about the devil & Satan & death a lot. He said, if you’re not happy it’s because you don’t have a soul.’ He said ‘When you sold your soul to the devil he’s going to come for you.’ ‘It’s payback time’ – all these are from many doom & gloom statements.

He knew he was on the broad highway to hell & that highway was ‘Demon drugs.’ I was the one & only person who stood on that highway with the sign ‘STOP’ but he went around me. However, I did save his Soul possibly from Hell or a terrible Purgatory. It showed it in the dreams. His Purgatory was only 10 days because of me & he’s united to God through my Soul for all eternity. He’s happy now but the earth equation didn’t work. I am also reasonably happy as I got over the earthly angst, released him from my flesh, surrendered it to God, & was made free. And so, there wasn’t any notable grief for me at his ‘parting’ because I had already disentangled my ‘flesh’ in favor of ‘spirit – we never parted spiritually.

 

Here are the words to ‘Cocaine & Broken Bottles’ which is directly about him waiting for me outside my apt, longing for me, & being sorry we weren’t together – fearing he’d never have me again. This was posted April 7, 2019 when we hadn’t seen each other about 5 months. He would wait outside my apt by my 2nd floor window to see if I was there – but I rarely was, so according to this, he was standing in the rain & experienced in this song all the miseries of us being apart.:

Below, he performs, the only time he did so after age 17, rapping our song, his repentence, at a small gathering – because of this song we were mystically married – I accepted his proposal to TAKE HIS HEART

 

NOV 16 19 COC N BROKE BOT APR 20 NOV 30 19 SONG 4 ME 

“Wash away my pain

I’m standing in the rain

Waiting for you

Don’t know why

‘Cause some things never change

I have made mistakes

Here’s my heart to take

Not much left ‘cause all it’s ever done is break

Hate to watch you go

 

You left me on my own

Alone & broken homes

I swear it’s all I know

It’s hard to be me

Especially on TV

 

Will never see the same

You of all these chains

I’m feeling like a slave

Day by day by day

Soon as night fall hits

It’s alcohol & cocaine

It’s the life I chose

It can’t be how it goes

Cameras all in my face

Make it go away

 

Wash away my pain

I’m standing in the rain

I’m used to bein’ free

But free I’ll never be

I understand that now

Alone amongst the crowd

Take a look in my face

Tell me what do you see

Little miserable me

Is all I’ll ever be

Shackles all on my feet

Using the same seat

Wish I could be you

 

And you could be me

‘Cause DEATH IS CALLIN’ MY NAME

No longer winnin’ these games

Wish I was the same

You took all that I gave

Wash away my pain

I’m standin’ in the rain

 

          He also posted this on Face book on May 7, 2019 {I left the grammar as he wrote it}:

 

“It’s very rare a person sells their soul for riches if you can’t find happiness it because your soulless you sold your soul for something so cheap like a party lifestyle or community popularity and you got it now the devils here to collect and you don’t even realize it”

 

We were spiritually married {a sacrament} on Sunday, April 21, 2019 because of his repentance & my continued love for him, forgiveness &

acceptance. It’s like he said ‘I’m sorry” & I said, “I accept you – you said take your heart, OK, I receive it. You said you wish I was you & you were me, OK, here we are as ONE” – as shown in this song {Cocaine & broken Bottles} as well as other posts, such as the one I copy here. There were several posts speaking of the demons haunting him & selling one’s soul to the devil. He ‘sold his soul’ for the party lifestyle, which means drugs & all that it entails – including all the people of the drug mentality. He rejected the opposite – the Godly lifestyle, going into rehab & being with me. He wanted me as his secret lover, to get all that Godly love – in secret. But I knew, once & for all, I could no longer stand being second fiddle, his ‘partner’ being feted in public, going to events together, having dozens of images together. I went nowhere with him, he would not be seen in public with me, he did not permit any images of us together, & he never gave me his phone number, nor told me where he lived. {I did find out some of these items anyway, by my own spying.}

To say this was a somewhat ‘dysfunctional’ relationship would be an understatement. He thought he got what he wanted; an infantile solution to his dilemma, but it brought me great misery. I could not stand it any more at one point. But for the time being, we got spiritually married – which is forever. {What God has joined together, let no man put asunder!}

 

Now let us understand the sacrament of marriage

According to the writings of the early Church Fathers sacrament signifies a sacred thing which lies concealed. The Greeks often expressed the same idea in their use of the word mysterion (Latin: sacramentum) or literally “mystery.” This meaning we have come to learn from St. Paul’s Epistle to the Ephesians (1:9) where it is said: “That he might make known to us the mystery (sacramentum) of his will”; and to Timothy: “…great is the mystery (sacramentum) of godliness” (1 Tim. 3:16); and in the Book of Wisdom: “They knew not the secrets (sacramenta) of God” (Wis. 2:22-24). In these and many passages throughout scripture the word sacrament is perceived and signifies nothing more than a holy thing that lies concealed or hidden.

The Church Fathers, therefore, deemed the word sacrament an appropriate term to express the sensible signs that communicate grace in a tangible way. According to Pope St. Gregory the Great such a sign ought to be called a sacrament, because the divine power secretly carries out our salvation under the veil of sensible things.

There are 7 sacraments instituted by Jesus Christ, they are:

  • Baptism

  • Confirmation

  • Eucharist

  • Penance (reconciliation or confession)

  • Anointing of the Sick

  • Holy Orders

  • Matrimony

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Please understand as I said, he was leading two lives. At some point, after our mystical marriage, I decided to put

my foot down & demand that he make me #1, or at least, I would wait for him to chase me instead of me chasing him. It’s always better to be chased than to chase, you have the advantage.

But this was a new game that he wasn’t ready for – at least with me. He was spoiled. He thought it had been that way & it would continue. But I had gotten stronger, I got over the addiction to him. It was not easy, as hard as rocks, but I did it with the help of God’s grace.

But he did not have the strength to do as he must. He waited & waited for me to contact him, waited & waited. One year, two, then it went into three years. We were both used to absences of months, but this was extreme. And he was going through emotional Hell, I saw it in my dreams. I feared he would take his own life.

At that point, I contacted him through a friend. I was not on Face book, but I had a message sent. Because of that message – he didn’t see it right away, he called me on June 2, 2022 – as God predicted he would, months before.

OK, so we talked over one hour. I would not let him back into my life as it was before, I made demands. He’d have to consider.

But after a month I sensed he could not come up to the plate, it was over – Finished, caput.

And how right I was. He apparently lost the will to live. I sensed it. And on August 14, 2022, he died of some kind of over dose. I don’t know the details. I do know his female partner was with him. It’s all I know. His two lives were over, the façade & the secret one. But his spiritual life had begun. He immediately got closer to myself & God

& we’ve been communicating ever since. Yes, it’s a tragedy of sorts, but one that has a happy spiritual ending, like Jesus & his Cross. Yes, He died, but He lives. So with Nick.

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Agatha Christie Channeled

 

Chapter 2 Channeling Agatha Christie

written 11-28-22

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          ‘Been watching all the main crime movies on You tube, starting with Sherlock Holmes with Basil Rathbone & Nigel Bruce {my fave}, then Jeremy Brett – saw all there is. Then moved to Poirot, saw every one of the 71 episodes including the traumatic {for me} last one & a few items on Miss Marple {don’t like it} & Insp. Dalgliesh.

          I have a chapter in my head about the psychology of these works, saving it for later. Right now it interests me to channel Mrs. Christie, after reading this account of her on Wikipedia:

Dame Agatha Mary Clarissa Christie, Lady MallowanDBE (née Miller; 15 September 1890 – 12 January 1976) was an English writer known for her 66 detective novels and 14 short story collections, particularly those revolving around fictional detectives Hercule Poirot and Miss Marple. She also wrote the world’s longest-running play, the murder mystery The Mousetrap, which has been performed in the West End since 1952. A writer during the “Golden Age of Detective Fiction“, Christie has been called the “Queen of Crime”. She also wrote six novels under the pseudonym Mary Westmacott. In 1971, she was made a Dame (DBE) by Queen Elizabeth II for her contributions to literature. Guinness World Records lists Christie as the best-selling fiction writer of all time, her novels having sold more than two billion copies.

 

Christie was born into a wealthy upper middle class family in Torquay, Devon, and was largely home-schooled. She was initially an unsuccessful writer with six consecutive rejections, but this changed in 1920 when The Mysterious Affair at Styles, featuring detective Hercule Poirot, was published. Her first husband was Archibald Christie; they married in 1914 and had one child before divorcing in 1928. Following the breakdown of her marriage in 1926 she made international headlines by going missing for eleven days. During both World Wars, she served in hospital dispensaries, acquiring a thorough knowledge of the poisons that featured in many of her novels, short stories, and plays. Following her marriage to archaeologist Max Mallowan in 1930, she spent several months each year on digs in the Middle East and used her first-hand knowledge of this profession in her fiction.

 

According to UNESCO‘s Index Translationum, she remains the most-translated individual author.[1] Her novel And Then There Were None is one of the top-selling books of all time, with approximately 100 million copies sold. Christie’s stage play The Mousetrap holds the world record for the longest initial run. It opened at the Ambassadors Theatre in the West End on 25 November 1952, and by September 2018 there had been more than 27,500 performances. The play was temporarily closed in March 2020 because of COVID-19 lockdowns in London before it reopened in May 2021.

In 1955, Christie was the first recipient of the Mystery Writers of America‘s Grand Master Award. Later that year, Witness for the Prosecution received an Edgar Award for best play. In 2013, she was voted the best crime writer and The Murder of Roger Ackroyd the best crime novel ever by 600 professional novelists of the Crime Writers’ Association. In September 2015, And Then There Were None was named the “World’s Favourite Christie” in a vote sponsored by the author’s estate.[2] Many of Christie’s books and short stories have been adapted for television, radio, video games, and graphic novels. More than 30 feature films are based on her work. {end Wikipedia portion}

          This is but a small fraction of what is written there about her – the rest I find interesting so please avail yourselves of it.

          My speaking to the mind of Agatha Christie, channeling her. It does not mean she is actually ‘talking’ to me – it means, as I have explained before, that I’m READING her mind. So here goes.

 

          ME: I surmise, Ms Christie, that you were born with the talents which you portray in your writings, which are, to figure out amazing plots using the psychology of characters in a setting, & the ability to sit down & year after year, keep writing it all down. You were gifted, it was inborn to be sure as no one could develop such savant abilities by human effort, no more than Mozart could have taught himself to be who he was. Am I correct so far?

 

          AC: {Agatha Christie} Of course you are.   

 

ME: OK then. I would like to ask you to start off, how {if I may} do my abilities compare to yours? What is

 

inborn in my nature that gave me the abilities to live what I lived & write what I wrote? In what way am I an equivalent to you? Not saying I’m your equal, as I am spiritual but do not claim equality with Jesus Christ, just asking what are the similarities or equivalencies.

 

          AG: This is an interesting question of psychology.

          I was born with the abilities as you described. You are a different sort of person like so:

          You are a saint {Rasa blushes} & a woman of God whose life revolves around God & how to understand the ways of God, to follow Her, – you taught yourself & now teach others how to find Union with this Divine Person.

          People will forever fail to understand you because they simply aren’t on that level. They see things in worldly ways & spirituality is absent to their minds, so they see you in worldly terms. But you are not worldly, you are spiritual.

          In every facet of your life, included in all the activities you undertook, you sought the meaning of these ventures in the precincts of God. What was sin, what was not, in following your instincts? What regular interpretations on sin did you accept, what did you reject? That took some head work.

Now let’s center on your life story.

Here are the highlights or events that stand out, the things you’ll be remembered for:

 

1        Your juxtaposition of religion/spirituality & sex

2        Your openness regarding your sex life with accounts & pictures of men

3        The abuse you endured & rose above

4        Your physical beauty

5        The ability to write it all down

6        Your activities – the variety of them – being unusual

7        All the men you encountered & talk about

 

The word that would best describe how people see you historically would be that you’re an anachronism.

You appear in this world with a mind set, beliefs & behavior that smacks of another time – whether past or future, but it does not coincide with the world you were born into.

 

ME: That’s a new one on me, no person I channeled ever said that & I do find it challenging to understand & get used to, but it does open a new way of thought.

I shall again ask you what do you see in my future?

AC: I see huge amounts of financial gain, so much money you won’t know what to do with it.

ME: Everyone says that, like it’s usually the first thing that comes out of the minds of those I channel. But no one is telling me exactly or specifically what does it come from. I imagine, & they usually concur, from the books, movies & TV that will emerge out of the Life.

AC: Of course. What else could it be? Yes, you will have money from the gas & or oil under your land, but this other project will be more. 

Below, Agatha Christie as a young lady – After, historical photos 

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Part 9   Contents

        Part 9 is a potpourri of events exciting, challenging, bizarre & macabre, peppered with nude & erotic images of Rasa’s male models & young husband, not to be outdone by Rasa’s nude & glamour pics. Starts with cooking dinner for Dr. Robert Atkins, young husband dies of an overdose & voices regrets, the hard but righteous path that I chose,, world’s greatest lover Miklos Hargitay, Wisdom of the Cross, Charles Keating visits me, Robert Culp & Bill Cosby, Cougering & the wicked ways of young men, the Fuck & Rob Bandits, My neighbors who killed their parents, Strange eggs in my nest – the Rotten Reverend & magician who refuses to vanish, Channel Queen Victoria on mindset of the rich, Ron Van Clief & Jim Brown, Mr. Universe/Mr America lovers & friends – Vern Weaver, Harold Poole, Franco Columbu, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Dennis Tinerino, Boyer Coe, Chris Dickerson & Reg Lewis, Prophecies of the future of this Life Story, Pics of me with celebrities – Congresswoman Bella Abzug, Tom Selleck, New York Mayor Abraham Beame, New York Governor Mario Cuomo

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ME: Oh yes, in the first item of what I will be remembered for you mention religion/spirituality, but few people pay attention to this. I wrote most of my books on this subject during my early book creations, on the Beatific Vision, Souls in Purgatory, the Divine Stigmata, Yoga & Christianity & have written many articles on my spiritual experiences. How will this figure in the public’s perception of me in the future, especially, when I’m gone?

 

AG: It will be a bone of contention. It will be the never-ending dichotomy referred to, some saying you could not be that saintly creature here expressed, others saying you can. It’s like when you Stripped for God, the controversy never ended & will not end. Indeed, your teaching or position on this matter is wholly different than that of society & of course you are right, Patriarchy is wrong. Sex is not sinful, evil or dirty. It can be Sacred when Love is in it – that is what you profess. But it has been so mutilated by this society that few people think of sex in an innocent or even Holy manner, they haven’t risen to that level yet – that sort of idea is long in the future, hundreds of years.

Until society catches up to that idea, this part of your life will not be understood, but argued about. And this controversy will serve to make your story more interesting, as it isn’t like everyone else, it’s weird to some, your life makes new statements that haven’t been made before. A woman in the adult trade also being a bona fide minister of God, a saint, a martyr, an example of virtue – all this is without example prior to you. Usually saints were against

 hedonism, having fun, doing sex – certainly no saint we know of was a Cougar, lol. Saints gave up all these things for the love of God. You did give up some of this for many years – but during that time you produced x rated videos for making money. You did not have sex but the videos catered to the sex desires of men – their fetishes. And then after 31 years you were told by your inner God to go out, drink & have fun, quit your celibacy. This will cause great controversy when it is brought into the open. You’ve seen how people react when you talk to them in bars – Outrage. “God will never tell you to have sex!”

          And here is an important element where you & I are totally different in our lives & in our writings. In my writing, the focus of my life – I am there to ENTERTAIN. Even though you were a professional entertainer, your life is not about that. And your writings are not created to entertain but to TEACH.

          In explaining your life you are trying to explain what you learned, what is the path of righteousness, what is the path to Hell.

          I did not by any means try to teach people to find God, although my hero Poirot & other I created, indeed, were on the side of justice & Truth. You saw how in the last case of Poirot he became a murderer. This upset you terribly. You had a glowing saintly image of him, & for him to kill someone went against your nature, & you were hurt. But I told you then it was entertainment – that I wanted to give him a dramatic sendoff, & this was a good way for him to go – murdering a man who would in future cause others murdered. It was righteous, but then again, Jesus would not have done it personally.

{But it is recorded that all sorts of terrible things happened to his persecutors after the Cross, the Temple curtain was torn from the top to bottom, the dead walked the streets, the high Priest went crazy & Herod got a terrible illness of parasites crawling out of his anus.}

But I convinced you my writing was more for entertainment than teaching religion & spirituality the way you do.

 

          ME: Yes, that last episode soured me on all the 70 stories I had seen before. I saw Poirot with rose colored glasses before, now the glasses came off. I was disappointed. I took it too seriously you told me, it was entertainment. I could imagine a different response to this case. Like for instance, Poirot would teach that God’s karma would get this man, & we see in some way God causes a righteous accident to happen to him rather than Poirot actually putting a bullet through his forehead. It seemed inconceivable for Poirot to do this.

          AC: But there is the difference between us. None of my characters ever taught karma. You teach karma in some cases, like with your brother who was cruel to you, you show how bad luck dogged him in his life & in the end he died a failure, but strangely, in his school days he was voted ‘Most Likely to Succeed.’

 

          ME: Alright, you have taught me a lot about both of us, Ms Christie, & I am grateful. Is there anything else you can tell me about my future while we’re at it?

          AC: You will have all your dreams come true. All the things you wished for will happen before you die, you’ll be very happy.

                   ME: What dreams are you referring to? Right now my mind is on the Sisterhood & all that goes with it, like an Order, a Convent of sorts, a Society for women to give them Spiritual Inspiration, emotional & physical security, an education. Like the University of Mother God College campus where only women are allowed with safe space on the campus as well as the Temple to Mother God. This is a dream but I don’t know if I’ll have the ability to pull it off before I die, even the beginnings. Is there any hope for that? Or any other dreams you see fulfilled?

           AC: It’s too difficult to conceive it all right now. Maybe with the great amount of money you’ll have you could purchase a property that in future will be the beginning of the College with Temple. Women would be greatly attracted to a super-fancy mansion of this type, something to feast their imagination on, living there. And so when you die, it goes to the Sisterhood. A vestigial beginning but with a lot of ideas you present to their heads when they look at your life.

         This will gel into your mind later, let is go for now, it will appear to your mind as time goes by.

          ME: Thank you Agatha Christie, I will channel you again in the future.

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Why Sex & Have Fun?

 

 

Chapter 1 Channel Ramana Maharshi

on why the push to ‘have fun’ – which wasn’t   written 11-25-22

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          I have been puzzled for years, wondering why God ‘forced’ me to quit celibacy & go out & have ‘fun’ – which wasn’t, in the end, but turned out to be as one might suspect, ‘The Other Place.’ 

Just published yesterday!

 

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          Many folks & saints have spoken to me with different answers, the best one by William Bond, who said maybe I was sent not for myself but for others.

          Recently I channeled Ramana Maharshi, one of my Gurus, the last one in fact, who brought me to nonduality in early 2007. That was a big change in my life. And strangely enough, when I did this stint at the bequest of God, I lost the consciousness of nonduality, as Ramana told me later in the game, I’d have to ‘give up’ Nick {spiritual husband} if I wanted to regain the state. When he said it I was still ‘obsessed’ with Nick {2019} & thought it impossible to do so, but eventually I managed, & what a relief.

Ramana gave me the answers which finally quieted my heart, & I shall reproduce the conversation now, asking him anew; he laid to rest my qualms as to why God would do such a thing to me when it was so painful. Here goes:

          ME: Ramana, I am asking again – Here I was in a state of relative peace, my sex drive quieted down, my mind clear as a bell & I have entered the sublime state of nonduality. And now God speaks to me, saying,

          “I want you to quit the celibacy, go out & have fun…….if you do not do this, you will be outside the will of God.”

          Now all is said & done, I did my bit, I cougered, drank, had fun & raised Cain. I was naughty – not nice, did all sorts of crazy, embarrassing & silly things – even put myself in danger from these young men. And I suffered like a dog on a chain when I fell in love & I went to Hell & back. This was fun? And God knew all this would happen, that it would be my

fate to suffer such behavior & I’d make a fool of myself. God knew everything I would experience & then why did God make me do it?

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After all, I was, like I said, in a state of relative peace. It wasn’t Nirvana but in the vicinity & God takes me from peace to chaos & anxiety. And this fails my spiritual logic, as all the masters teach to stay in a place of celibacy & contemplation is the highest arena, to be a missionary is second to that – but this was neither one or the other, it was lowering myself to the shallows & wastes of human sense.

I have thought & thought & questioned & channeled, without getting a satisfactory answer. There have been many good ideas, but nothing absolute & I sense you will show me the facts.

          RAM: Yes I will. The best way to explain this to you is two examples, one of Jesus, then of yourself.

          First, is it not taught that Jesus, the Son of God, came to earth, lowered himself, to reach humanity to save them from their sins? And he suffered & eventually died or passed out on the Cross, & people believed in him, & a whole new huge religion was formed, & untold billions have believed & been saved by Faith & trust in Jesus.

          Now he could have stayed in Heaven & continued to enjoy its benefits, but He chose to return to earth to help us.

          You also claim to be an Avatar, & you said that you were in heaven, & elected coming back to earth for Female Empowerment. You could have stayed where you were & enjoyed the Bliss, but you returned to earth & suffered & you have helped women & will do more.

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          And what about the saints who all do good works, missionaries, self-sacrificers? Many of them choose to go into the world, the streets, wherever people are – to save those in need be it physical or spiritual succor. The saints always suffer because people of the earth are not evolved, & those who are un-saintly hurt others, so the bad hurt the good, even when you try to help them.

          So there are your examples of why the saints or Avatars or good souls lower themselves from heaven, or a contemplative peaceful state on earth, to walk the streets, to seek under bridges, alleys & ghettoes, the poor & obscure who are crying out for salvation, & understand this was a call to you to not really ‘have fun’ but to go out there & do something for humanity in the GUISE or FAÇADE of ‘having fun.’

          ME: But God did not explain this to me. Why not? Why was God cagey, as She has been in the past – for instance, when She tricked me into marrying Richard Von Werder when I had resisted him for many years. And

here God explained nothing, just said to quit celibacy, have sex, go drink, have fun. And She left it at that. I was totally confused & uncertain, but I obeyed. It wasn’t easy. And of course people misunderstood & accused me of just wanting to whoop it up & be a hedonist & sex maniac, lol.

          Here’s the rub, – I don’t have to tell you – you & all enlightened people know. When one gets involved with the earth, one’s consciousness sinks down to a lower level & one feels all the emotions which give one anxiety. It’s desires – they form. One has to look good, that becomes a focus. One has to act right to be successful in the dating game. One has to take chances. There is fear of being rejected & the fear is well founded – rejection abounds. Then there’s jealousy, ugly jealousy that one feels constantly in many situations. It brings back all the animal emotions & sinful thoughts & ideas like hate &anger. Even if one doesn’t give into these emotions strongly, one feels them & they’re ugly. It’s suffering, isn’t it?

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          And what is the purpose of all this?

          OK the saints leave their contemplation to go out into the streets – where angels fear to tread, or as I said when I stripped, ‘We go where Priests & nuns fear to tread.’

          But I was not a missionary. I did not go with a bible or tracts & stand on the street & give out literature at that time {though I had done that before} but I sat at the bars & drank alcohol & picked men up or had them pick me up & went & made love. That’s not the behavior of any saint I know, lol. Not the ones in the books.

          And so if this is what God wanted, why didn’t She send me out as a missionary? I had once done that before, around 2001, for 3 months up & down the streets with a megaphone preaching. But this was different.

          RAM: If God had sent you as a missionary like before, it would have been a different message. Here God actually wanted you to be a COUGAR – the message was like so,

          “Old woman, get out of your rocking chair. Put aside the knitting & the gardening tools & go out & find a young man & have fun with him. He needs you, you need him. Dispel the myth that old women are over the hill, unattractive for sex. They are viable, alive, they deserve to ‘have fun’ in the earthly sense.

          This ability for old women to have fun has been forbidden, denied them for thousands of years. They have been repressed, shut down & shut up. Loosen old women up, give them confidence, let them give up the myths about being finished, needing to go out to pasture. Let them cut loose.”

Don’t you see that was your missionary message? It wasn’t to repent of sin, this is a different message, it was to repent of repression. Repent of Patriarchy, repent of the double standard. Repent of fear of society.

          And so, as with your other projects, you empowered women. Can you see that now?

          ME: Yes, I see it more clearly. Strange, but I wrote & published two books on it – “Old Woman – Young Man, Why They Belong Together” Parts I & II, & yet, somehow I didn’t connect the dots.

          Now when you say it, I see it more clearly, that that is why I had to go out & drink & literally have sex again.

          I have always shown the world – often women – not only by words but example. I did not just preach to lift weights, I actually did it. Had I merely preached women should lift weights, what would have been the outcome? Who would have listened? It would have still behooved some female to go out there & demonstrate weight lifting, but I was the one that had to do it. I mean mainstream work – Esquire, Playboy, national TV shows. It had to be demonstrated. {Yes some women did it before me but it had not hit the national mainstream level.}

And this is the same token, one has to go out & do the thing one believes in, set an example. OK, I get it now.

          So tell me, did it work? I did it & it made a mark in my college town, but I have not got the national publicity I used to get. And so the time has not yet fully come, I gather, for the fruition of this mission. Will it come out in some mainstream way with my life story, is that what is coming?

          RAM: You have sown the seeds, they will grow. Don’t worry about it. It will indeed be a big part of your life story, as important as anything else you have done. And it will continue to grow & thrive long after you have gone, left the earth. These are seeds that will grow into groves of Oak Trees, big forests, major manifestations. You have left a great example & it isn’t just words, you have proof in your pictures. That’s why God had you not only to do what you did at the bars, but become a photographer so you have documented PROOF of your escapades, as people know, you had intimacy with many of your models, so as pictures say a thousand words, now people will see & believe what you did – lol.

          ME: It all makes sense, falls together. Thank you Ramana Maharshi!

          What about now & the future? Is it finished? Am I to do what now? Does it matter? I can be celibate or I can have sex, it’s all the same to me.

 

My sex drive does not compel me any more, I have reverted to how I felt when I was celibate, I am free.

          RAM: Like you say, you are free. Whatever you do is alright. You have beaten sex in that you overcame it. You plunged into the morass & then you got out. Wow, was it hard when you fell in love. But you succeeded. It was a great project, congratulations.

          ME: Thanks Ramana. You are a great Guru. {end Chapter 1}

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Purgatory & Death of Lover

 

Souls in Purgatory calling me –

2nd Two dreams re Lover & his death  11-18-22 

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I’ve not been paying attention to Holy Souls for weeks, having been discouraged because none of them appeared & none ascended. So I just stopped saying the Holy Mass. When I had these dreams I was baffled since I had forgotten about the Souls, but when I remembered them suddenly, I knew they were calling to me.

 

The first dream bothered me a lot. There was an old lady who brought children or the case of her children, to someone who had the ability to help – like a Welfare facility. Don’t know what happened, but she goes back home to an awful hovel. I had NO IDEA how poor she was – she has NOTHING.

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*** {OLD LADY SEEKING HELP FOR 2 INFANTS – VERY POOR: This is a person seeking help for 2 clients, often seen as ‘children.’ She cannot help them because she’s probably in Heaven – it’s not their prerogative to minister to Souls – it is ours. She probably came to me, but I wasn’t saying the Holy Mass, so she got nothing from me for them.

The poverty of these people is so pitiful – the dirtiness of the rugs the kids are wrapped in is the state of their Souls, which must be CLEANSED.

BLANKETS are like MANTLES. Holy souls or the Anointed have mantles of LIGHT. But those in a Purgatorial state have mantles of dirtiness – is surrounds them like being wrapped in a blanket, it obscures their vision of God & happiness.} ***

 

Her house doesn’t even have walls, it’s like an open area with a wall behind her & a stack of dirty rugs or blankets in front of her. She unravels one blanket – it’s red, then another & another, each one as dirty as can be. She has no clean blankets, she cannot afford to get them washed – not even the money for that – she has nothing.

 

*** {HAS NOTHING – CANNOT EVEN PAY TO WASH THE BLANKETS: The petitioner needs GRACE for these clients, it is Grace which does the cleansing. She cannot give it if she herself is either in Purgatory or Heaven.} ***

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After unraveling all the rugs I see an infant, then another infant. One of them has a wound. She needs someone to take them, to take care of them – adopt them. The place where she went for help it seems didn’t help & they had no idea how poor she was & the condition of her children.

 

I see a man from Australia – so I am told – sort of hovering by these blankets, & he takes one of the children. We were concerned he’d take the right one – don’t know what that means. But one child was saved.

 

*** {MAN FROM AUSTRALIA TAKES ONE OF THE CHILDREN: This is someone who has taken on ministering to one f the clients. Not sure what he does. Could be anything that gains Grace – the Holy Mass, prayers, sufferings, charity, or sacrifices.} ***

 

After that I see other situations of people with children in blankets, not as poor as this lady, the blankets are clean, but all needy people looking for help with their children.

 

In the second dream, I’m being led by a man who has rented an apt for part time, when we are working in this area – this is not clear what we’re doing. It has to be a decent place but not too expensive for some reason, I guess we aren’t rich.

 

I have in tow a little dog, some kind of a bulldog type, maybe a pug, by a leash.

 

The man leads me – I don’t know who he is, how he looks, just that he has something to do with me. We come to an alley & the door to the place I somewhat hidden, like in a narrow area between the huge wall it’s on & some kind of wall or partition in front of the door.

 

He unlocks the door & we go in to inspect.

 

*** {MAN LEADING ME, UNLOCKS DOOR, A RATHER HIDDEN PLACE: Without a doubt, this is someone in Heaven connecting me with the Soul. It is extremely difficult for a human, by themselves, to make a connection with a Soul in Purgatory – they are often led by a Celestial – it’s happened to me many times. Sometimes the ‘person’ is an Angel – could be the Guardian Angel of the person needing help.} ***

 

It’s the plainest apt imaginable, where a poor person would live. The furniture is modern & bare-bones type. We enter the living room first. There isn’t any color, it’s drab, but yet, I am satisfied. There is a couch on the left—off white, & another place to sit – not sure if it’s a day bed or sofa, also a plain color but darker, in front of me.

 

Both items have pillow cases left by the last tenant – I think it was an older man – fitted over the couch & the sofa on some part, plus one yellow pillow case. I exclaim to my friend that these 1st 2 pillow cases are exactly like the ones I have, an exquisite pattern of a floral design, pink, burgundy, fancy design with black trim on top. So this is a sign I’m supposed to be here.

 

*** {POOR APT: This seems to be a place inhabited by a Soul who has passed on. His pillow cases just like mine shows some connection to me, but I don’t know what. He might have been someone I know or someone who knows of me.

Come to think of it, my good friend Jack I think has died. It might be him. But I already had a dream about him which I didn’t write down, which seemed like he was in Heaven already. He was a stellar human being.

The LITLE DOG is an ALERT like a sentinel. Dogs bark to alert us of something. So I am being alerted.} ***

 

Next I go to examine other rooms to the left. Surprised to see a bathroom with only a toilet – the man tells me it doesn’t work. Next to it is another bathroom with toilet, sink & I guess tub, which is in proper order. But I exclaim,

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“Two baths next to each other!”

But the man says,

“I told you, the first one doesn’t work.”

I was thinking of going past here to see any other rooms – where is the kitchen? But the dream ends, I do not see the rest of the place or a kitchen, maybe it has no kitchen, which would be pretty bad.

 

*** {LIVING ROOM, PLAIN, & BATHROOM – NO BEDROOMS & NO KITCHEN THAT I CAN SEE: The main message here is no kitchen, no nourishment for this Soul. If I was saying the Holy Mass, you might see a kitchen, a table, food or drink for the Soul. A bedroom, which I didn’t even think of during the dream, would show REST as REST IN PEACE, but this Soul is not there yet.

I must immediately say a Holy Mass.} *

 

Dreams re Lover Nick

 

11-18-22              Men Trying to Reach Me, One will drown

 

I was walking fast down a big open space like a square, brightly open to the sky, when I knocked into a male in a cream-colored suit & all light clothing going the opposite way. I thought it was just a random accident, but after I excused myself & thought I was free, he is following me – something I don’t want.

 

          I try to get away from him but then a second man appears & it seems a serious imposition, & I am having trouble getting away, so I rise into the air, but the man in the suit seems to touch my feet slightly & I must rise higher & higher – which is a strain at times.

 

          *** {TALL MAN IN CREAM COLORED SUIT: We COLLIDE & then I CANNOT GET AWAY FROM HIM. This is Nick as my HUSBAND, who I cannot get away from after we meet. I want to but I can’t get over the obsession – it’s love but of the earth, & I’m having trouble getting back to my intimacy with God.

When I rise into the air I’m beginning to ascend into my Spiritual Space again, but not totally – he can touch my feet, so I am STILL IN BONDAGE TO HIM & MY FLESH AS I struggle to rise higher into the Light.} ***

 

          The other man is short while this man is tall, he’s in soft multi colors.

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*** {THE SECOND MAN, SHORT, COVERED IN CLOTHING SIMILAR TO THE APPEARANCE OCEAN WE WILL ENCOUNTER – This is the SHORT TIME AFTER I got over Nick, but HE DID NOT GET OVER ME, that is, HIS OBSESSION CONTINUED.

What he did not realize was that TRYING TO BE WITH ME, he could nor rise into the Spirit as I had risen, he was too much OF THE EARTH. The ocean I fly over is the world, the flesh, & he is covered with the world & flesh {his clothing}, he can’t ascend.

          And so, after we reconciled June 2nd, 2022, he was following me in his mad love but he could not ‘go up’ & staying in his earth mentality or consciousness, he died. He could only LEAVE HIS BODY OR FLESH to be with me, & THAT HE DID.} ***

 

          Then something happens that liberates me – the ocean is right ahead of us. If I rise into the air as I am, & fly over the ocean, in order to follow me they must go into the water. The suit man does not, but the shorter one does, & he follows me as I fly farther & farther over the ocean, & so he’s getting into deeper & deeper waters. He is SO OBSESSED with this he might not pay attention to the fact that HE WILL DIE as he goes into water above his head – & he is headed to that. At some point unless he can swim like a fish, he’s doomed.

 

          The surface of the ocean looks like a picture of a world globe, all in soft colors & lights with the moon shining over it. His outfit also has like colors.

 

2nd dream: The glass full of golden liquid & I am tempted to be jealous.

          I was with my lover before this first scene; I see we were deeply intimate, reconciled.

 

*** {INTIMATE, RECONCILED: This is when Nick called me & showed me he wanted to be together – a big event as it was only the 2nd time in eleven years he ever called me. And he wanted to see me, but I told him under what conditions, that he leave his fake wife & go into rehab, that he was not able to meet.} ***

 

          But now I’m going into a brightly-lit kitchen, which is in front of me & he in the doorway. The kitchen is shaped like a railroad car – about 8’ by 15’.

          The lover stands in the doorway, I must squeeze past him where I see a glass sort of hovering in the air like it is there for me to take, in front of me, & also in front of him.

 

*** {GLASS FILLED WITH GOLDEN LIQUID: This is the ELIXIR OF LOVE. One can give this love & receive it with whomever they wish. He did not do as I asked, but he stayed with Ruth Anne, so he is giving my ‘sister’ the love that should be mine.

          This was me waiting for him to do something after the phone call June 2nd, as was predicted months before. But he never did anything & killed himself of a drug over dose on Aug 14, 2022.

Why must I SQEEZE PAST HIM? Means he is BLOCKING YOUR WAY to access the LOVE POTION or reception of his love.

But another telling symbol is the KITCHEN shaped like a RAILROAD CAR. RAILROADING is forcing someone to do something, pushing them. A railroad is FORCEFUL & nothing can stand before it without being mowed down. This is your ULTIMATUM or terms by which you would see Nick – leave Ruth Anne & go into rehab. So in the dream, he instead offers Ruth Anne his SWAN SONG or his last ingestion of drugs, which kills him.} ***

 

          He’s singing & as he sings he offers this glass to my SISTER instead of me, & this disturbs me greatly because we were just together intimately & reconciled. And I knew then, since he ignored me, he did not even try to leave her.

 

          *** {HE’S SINGING – WHY? This is his SWAN SONG – not a good omen. Singing is not always happy, it is a portent of trauma or death. The only time it’s recorded Jesus sang is at his Last Supper. Also, you, Rasa, for months before your several heart attacks, began to sing, trying to form a band. But nothing took place. And thereafter, you were disabled from even dancing, so it was also your SWAN SONG. It’s also like a TOAST TO DEATH as if he’s saying to Ruth Ann

“I drink to you – a toast. My last drug intake, which will kill me. It’s because of you, so I take it in your honor, for my LOVE OF DRUGS.”} ***

 

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          As I stand over the sink I am upset, & tempted to explode in anger, but I resist. I explain to myself like so:

“This will backfire on her. I am hurting now but her turn is coming, she will suffer before the end of this day on account of him. Just remain silent & let fate unfold.”

 

*** {I SUFFERED, NOW IT WILL BE HER TURN, I MUST STIFLE MY ANGER, JUST LET FATE TAKE ITS COURSE: Her suffering she will feel now for a long time –his death, his absence. My suffering is past, hers began & will go on. She knows their druggie lifestyle that she enabled, has killed him. She will know that forever.

 

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Champions & Me

reglewis13

 

          Reg Lewis was an interesting person who seemed to go from riches to rags.

 

“In 1954, Lewis joined West’s revue as the youngest in her crew – he was 18. Four years later, he was the reigning Mr. Universe (professional class) when the actress selected him as “Mr. Hercules” in a contest held at the Bert Goodrich Gym in Hollywood. Among his rewards were interviews with studio casting heads, and that sent him on a path to the movies.”

 

Reg Lewis     Chapter 14 continues Lovers &/or Friends with 9 Mr Universes – Mr Americas

written 10-20-22 

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Above see his beautiful wife Sheri & Harold Poole that we spoke of before

Reg Lewis was active in bodybuilding for 30 years, from the 1950s through the 1980s; here is a listing of his many titles:

 

Junior Mr. Olympics Winner (1953) Lewis won this title at age 17.
Mr. Olympics Winner (1956)
Mr. Pacific Coast Winner (1956)
Mr. Physical Fitness Winner (1956)
Mr. Universe Professional Class Winner (1957)
Mr. USA-AAU Second Overall (1957)
Mr. Hercules chosen by Mae West (1960)
Mr. America Winner (1963)
Olympia-IFBB Third (1970)
Natural America Masters Overall Winner (1982)
Mr. America Over Forty Winner (1983)

 

Bodybuilder and actor Reg Lewis was born in Niles, California, on January 23, 1936. He began bodybuilding at a young age, winning his first title at age 17. Lewis jump-started his career with the assistance of actress Mae West who, in 1954, enlisted a gym full of bodybuilders (including Lewis, Mickey HargitayGordon Mitchell, and Dan Vadis) and took them and her act on a tour of nightclubs to various cities across the nation. West’s male revue created a sensation; according to Gordon Mitchell, the show and the men were a big hit with the all-female audiences. On occasion, Lewis acted as an escort for West, taking her to film premieres, nightclub openings, and other high-profile events throughout the 1950s, 1960s, and 1970s. And Lewis appears in West’s final film, Sextette (1978; with Timothy Dalton).

{Rasa says: Oh my, Timothy Dalton. What a line she had for him: Something like “I have some time for you so I could say ‘the British are Coming!’}

All I could find on Sheri Lewis besides one pic from a Russian website: Muscle Beach History – by Stuntmovie – Getbig.com

https://www.getbig.com › boards

 

Jun 7, 2013 — As Stunt so rightly pointed out, Sheri Lewis wife of Reg Lewis was quite the beauty.

 

My Account:

Below it’s Jayne Mansfield, believe it or not!

 

ercole_196206-07 3e59ea50363cd5e5290ddcf65c70cabf Reg-Lewis-banner2 

I knew Reg & Sheri Lewis in California around 1969 – went to their house somewhere in one of those Los Angeles ‘valleys, maybe San Fernando Valley.

They were both attractive & she must have been {or is} extremely rich, as she BOUGHT HIM AN AIRPLANE!    Their house was large, beautiful & sprawling –it was not a ‘mansion’. They had a 6 year old son.

I was fascinated by the fact that they entered the NABBA Mr. Universe & Miss Bikini Universe contests – 1957 – in London together & BOTH WON!

As far as lifting weights, she told me, in so many words,

“I gained muscle quickly by lifting weights, but then it came to a point I could gain no more.”

Of course, this was BEFORE WOMEN TOOK DRUGS.

Reg told me a bit about MAE WEST. He claimed to be

“her favorite, because I was the YOUNGEST.”

Mickey Hargitay also told me HE was her favorite, lol. She must have told each one the same thing.

Nowhere on the internet does it say he was her boyfriend or lover, just that he went with her to events, but he told me they were all her lovers, himself included.

 

There were two events they were involved with that I was a part of. First, they held an IFBB event in a big hall where I SPONSORED a female I was trying to manage – Yolanda Tugues. I was publishing a new-age give-away newspaper called ‘Enlightenment’ & as the editor of that paper, I wanted to present the award to the female who embodied,

“Most Radiant Health.”

The designated recipient was Yolanda – I wanted to promote her.

And to speak for me, I got a candidate for Mayor of Los Angeles to pipe up.

Only problem was, when he announced the chosen winner, it was the wrong person! I had to jump up to the podium {wow that was embarrassing!} & tell him it was someone else – it was made right & Yolanda got the trophy & roses from me.

Then Sheri told me it was SHE who made the change because she thought another girl was better qualified.   Yiikes, that was SO WRONG of her!

BTW I could not get anywhere with Yolanda no matter how much I tried {was doing this for free} because she wouldn’t OBEY me. Imagine of Elvis didn’t obey Col Parker!

I told her not to deal with anyone I fixed her up with personally, it was all business, & these guys, once alone with her, would lead her down the garden path. But she didn’t listen.

First, I got her a photographer to take images for free. But she gave him her phone – at his insistence – I saw him sneaking her into a corner for it – all men want access to you sans manager so they can lay you. Don’t know how that got screwed up, but all the images he took HE SAID were wretched & TOO DARK – unusable.

Next, I had got a call from Russ Meyer who wanted me for a movie. Instead, I brought him Yolanda, insisting she’d be better for the part, sacrificing myself for her.

She messed that up by allowing Meyer to visit her at home & then, I don’t know what happened, but the deal fell through.

I gave up. I was giving my time & energy for free, she fukked up the deals. Good bye Yolanda. But we remained friends. Maybe she’s still out there.

 reg-lewis

Back to Sheri & Reg: In the year 1971 or “72 Sheri & Reg held another contest, this time at their sprawling house. It was fixed up so you could seat 100 people or more, in fact, the famous manager, PATRICK CURTIS was there – the man who launched Raquel Welch.

*** He came up to me & wanted my number. Later he asked me for a NUDE IMAGE. He was INTERESTED in being my agent! But Rev. Judy Swaggart, who I was living with at the time & supporting, nixed the deal – as she nixed every deal that came up except what matched her agenda – Her agenda being me working, giving her money.

He was an uncertainty to me – maybe he just wanted a date – so I ignored him as she wished. Judy claimed it was wrong for him to want my picture nude – I don’t know – This is show biz & nudity is not a thing of scandal, it’s a commodity to be used. He could have made me another Raquel, but it was not meant to be – I had a destiny as more than a movie star. ***

 

Miss Voluptuous

 

OK so this contest another IFBB Miss Americana – 1971 or “72. They had a huge bevy of contestants – maybe 40 – & some of them were Hollywood starlets. I considered myself lucky to get an important trophy, Miss Voluptuous.

 

It was NYC 1975 & I’m a GUEST POSER {no money, nothing given} at the Miss Body Beautiful contest, WBBG, because I’d won the year before. So I am HONORED & give the trophy to the new winner. One of the reporters said it was too bad for the other girls I showed up, as I put them all in the shade, such was my class – he said it, I didn’t. I have a copy of his words somewhere.

 

Oh yes one of my fave anecdotes. The winner now has on the borrowed robe, fancy tiara & scepter, sitting on her thrown. She was average looking.

She says to me,

“Now that I have won, what will they do for me?”

I said,

“Nothing. You take the title & promote yourself with it.”

She was never heard from again.

 

So in the men’s contest, I see Reg Lewis, a shadow of his former self. He looks worn out, I sensed that hedonism & selfishness had marked his face. His body wasn’t so good, either compared to the current champions. This was not a huge venue & he didn’t get a trophy. He had come down in this ‘theater’, I felt he was desperate to stay ‘up there’ but he didn’t have a chance.

What happened to his rich, generous wife Sheri? I felt Reg had been a sort of gigolo, first under the care of Mae West, but especially his wife. He lived off them because he was young & perfect. Now he was cut loose, was he fancy free? I could smell failure. He had a lady friend there, she was in the contest & he introduced us. Her figure was good, but there were marks all over her face, old acne scars & her hairdo was stiff – no prizes. I never saw Reg again & have no idea where Sheri is, if she is. {End Chapter 14}

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Huge Life Story Success

Chapter 15   10-16-22 Dream predicts great financial success –

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Importance of Nick in my Life Story

 

 

We are in a building like a large patio, a dim, soft, romantic twilight. The light is low, like lamps under our floor boards coming up & moonlight outside.

There is a gathering LIKE NO OTHER. It’s myself & about a dozen & more of the greatest brainy, most mentally, psychologically, metaphysically talented people in the world – they know EVERYTHING – I being one of them, lol.

The thing is, any of us who says something to inform the others–they ALREADY KNOW IT! It’s funny.

 

But I must admit, we each of us knows almost ‘everything’ but it isn’t 100%, it’s just MOST of everything, but put together, we cover just about all there is.

The group is all types, male & female, dressed differently. I see colorful & casual, someone in a rich medium blue shirt or blouse with a lot of material in the arms & the rest of it is full also. There’s a feeling of ‘all types’ like these people are not one faith, one POV, they are here because of their brain-abilities & no other reason, which chooses them across the board.

  Below from my You Tube videos 2008 – The videos are gone but luckily I saved about 75 images from them.  There were hundreds of videos & some accidentally erased all of them from my pc – a year’s work.  

RASA19 RASA20 RASA21 RASA22 RASA23 RASA24 RASA25 RASA26 

*** {CIRCLE OF BRAINY PEOPLE – ALL TYPES – ONE WITH A VOLUMINOUS BLUE SHIRT – GATHERED IN A CIRCLE – DIM LIGHT: These are the characters NOT in my book but the characters THAT I AM in the context of my life story, & each of these characters represents an INTELLIGENCE & KNOWLEDGE that I gained from the experiences. Notably one persona sports a voluminous BLUE SHIRT, lots of MATERIAL especially in the arms. This is lots of BLUE material NOT I suspect blue as in ‘sexual’ but blue as in depressing, sad or sorrowful, the hard times I went through as described in my life.

Why is it a CIRCLE? This represents a POW WOW or a gathering of my FORCES – POWERS – MENTAL & SPIRITUAL FACULTIES, some of which are FORMIDABLE!

All these entities / personas come together in the BOOK/S of my LIFE STORY. Here we are in an enclave, it is not explained WHY but at the conclusion perhaps the last person to be described is the PUNCHLINE or the main reason for this & the other dreams.

The group is ECLECTIC in that there isn’t one type of persona here, there are different P’sOV – faiths – religions, as that’s who I am, I see things from many angles, not one faith, religion or zeitgeist.

The DIM LIGHT, like lights coming up from the cracks in the floorboards – like part of the floor on the sides has opening, a plan, then a blank, a plank, then a blank, & the light comes up from there softly….& Moonlight outside….This is the Light of the ‘Night’ or the non-daylight, which is the light of ‘the world.’ This is the light of DREAM & VISION INTERPRETATION – spiritual, metaphysical knowledge, occult knowledge. And through the opening in the floorboards implies ‘through the wood’ – the wood of the Cross. These abilities came to me through SUFFERING.} ***

 

I can’t contribute much because as soon as I begin to speak to tell them something, they already know it, lol.

We’re sitting in a circle & there is an opening in the room about 15’ wide, which you can dance in, with a solid floor.

A black lady {very dark} comes up to me from the circle & puts both her hands in mine, a sort of dancing embrace. She’s wearing a white pleated top such as the one I have, hundreds of pleats that come up & cover the neck – really classy, soft. I sense a gardenia or some sort of white flower by her waist or hair, like a corsage. As she embraces me she talks & because of what she says we dance & the step to the right, left foot meets, to the left, right foot meets, with a bounce, which I think is the POLKA, a happy dance. There is something WET coming from her, like from her side. And she says,

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*** {VERY DARK BLACK LADY, SOMETHING WET, WHITE PLEATED SOFT TOP, WHITE GARDENIA IN HER HAIR OR A CORSAGE, EMBRACES ME FOR A DANCE:   This is one of my POWERS or FACULTIES from the circle – one of whom I am & when I think of how DARK she is the GODDESS KALI comes to mind.

This is a symbol that can be looked upon with various perspectives. One thing, BLACK is the UNKNOWN GOD. She is mysterious, what She does or does not do baffles us, who She is we don’t know. Is She Energy, a Person? That means blackness to us, not daylight, on a dark night we SEE NOTHING – we don’t UNDERSTAND – ‘I see the Light’ or ‘I don’t see the Light at the end of the tunnel – I don’t understand.’

The WETNESS that comes from her SIDE reminds me of Jesus when He was pierced with the Lance, & blood & WATER gushed from his side! This Divine Stigmata represents all is given from his Heart, the Center of his Love, his emotions. This lady then is like that, She & I are One at the conclusion of this revelation.

Being black like this is also CHARCOAL or having been ‘burned up’ & now the Phoenix rises from the ashes. So it’s a double image of death & resurrection. The stigmata is MARTYRDOM or giving all of oneself for God, one has given their LIFE but out of this sacrifice of physical life lost is the GUSHING WATER OF GRACE, the Fountain of Eternal Life, the Spiritual rises as the flesh subsides. So to sum up this perspective, this is my death & resurrection, I gave my all like Jesus, I died to self & I rose up again, I died but I am living., my lower self extinguished but my Higher Self is joyful!

I should add that this lady is joyful in her attitude, not sad or downcast, very lively – this is ME after all I’ve been through, engaging myself to dance the POLKA, the most joyful, lively dance, like Scrooge did after his transformation & return to love & life, when he joined his nephew & their party for Christmas.

The third big perspective is KALI.   She is the AVENGER, an emanation of DURGA, who protects the human race & destroys the demon Maharashtri – Patriarchy. She alone could do it, the Male Gods could not!

And so my life has been a series of projects difficult to manifest, but I pushed through by the Grace of God. ‘We go where priests & nuns fear to tread’ was our motto when I preached in front of the White House.

The demons of Patriarchy opposed me when I tried to institute female body building, but I succeeded.

The demons of the adult trade tried to demoralize me, but I succeeded in preaching for 14 years in the story ‘I Strip for God.’

There was every type of demon from Patriarchy opposed me, assaulted me, throughout my life – hundreds of them – whatever I did – And even tried to kill me many times by accidents or human assaults, but I was spared.

Furthermore, as Goddess KALI I lived to avenge myself, so to speak, against my enemies – not by nefarious schemes but simply by SUCCEEDING! They could not stop me, my motto at the Playboy club in 1978 was

“My success will be my revenge!”

And the demons of Patriarchy fell down in defeat when I got through.

RASA27 RASA28 RASA29 RASA30 RASA31 RASA32 RASA35 

Her OUTFIT: white soft many times pleated top that covers the neck: White is PURITY ‘The Pure in Heart Shall See God.”

PLEATS are REPETITION. This would say “the actions of her good heart were repeated many times, – like forgiveness. And covering the neck would be saying ‘a lot of’ as in ‘up to my neck’ or ‘up to my eyeballs’, so much of a thing. Again it is a repeat of actions of a GOOD HEART.

 

The GARDENIA as hair ornament or corsage:

The Gardenia is an EVERGREEN plant {evergreen represents eternal life, like a pine or Christmas tree} – always white – extremely aromatic, & being white reiterates the concept of pure in heart. I used to have a Gardenia plant in my bedroom as a child, which in winter I encased in plastic, & would put my face in it at times to get a big aromatherapy, not just the scent of the blossoms, but the entire plant. Therefore, this brings to mind relief from the pains of my youth when my family was abusing me.

This represents, then, an award or accolade for when I was abused, I reacted to it in the spiritual manner, not with hate or revenge, but trying to cope with it, forgiving my enemies. This is a mark of SUCCESS.

The dance is JOY – Joy at the success of my life & my life story!} ***

 

“I see huge sums of money coming in for you! Lots & lots of money!”

I see it in my minds eye, pouring in, & we are joyful over it, it’s a great triumph!

 

*** {MONEY – HUGE SUMS POURING IN: Is money here in the literal sense or meaning having great value? I think it’s BOTH, the reason being that I have channeled a dozen saints & even earth people, & each & every one of them, the first thing they emphasized was big money was coming to me from this. They did not mean value besides money, they meant money.

And when there is great SUCCESS, such as a movie/s, TV shows, big media, big money, there is tremendous attention & repercussions for good. God reminded me an example. Jesus Christ’s life story being magnified brought attention to his great deeds, miracles, healings as well as his teachings. His sufferings, sacrifices, all of that brought attention to Who He was, what He did, what He represented. It changed the world.

And so, when a person has magnification of their life, whatever they did is made BIG, a lot of people hear about it, it changes lives, their thoughts & feelings, their behavior. It changes the world in all sorts of ways. If their life has meaning & a lot to say, it has great INFLUENCE.

This DANCE shows you will have great JOY from the success of your life story.

The Goddess Kali is the spokeswoman or mouthpiece for all the parts of you that contributed to the production of your story.} ***

 

RASA36 RASA37 RASA38 RASA39 RASA40 RASA41 RASA43 

(2) The Blankets the animals get hold of – The Dandelion leaves I count out for Nick {old webman RIP} which are like MONEY – we go 50/50 on everything

 

Strange dream. I get a smallish box like a medicinal box I get over-the-counter meds in, & it’s filled with dandelion leaves, a stack.

 

*** (DANDY-LION: It took me a while to get this, but lionize is a symbol of someone who is well known for writing a book/s & they are LIONIZED means they are respected, admired, even adored for what they wrote. They are treated like a CELEBRITY, ACCLAIMED. And DANDY says what you wrote is dandy or great.

Dandelions are part of your diet which is healthy & totally free, you indulge in them constantly, even having them growing on your window sill. So it did not cost you anything to write your life story, remember your memories for others. It’s a GIFT from God, writing your story is a GIFT. And in a ‘medicinal’ box might say this has been therapy for you.} ***

 

Nick, my old web man who died of a heroin overdose is here, to my right.

Taking the stack out, I separate it into two neat piles & say to him,

“We go 50/50 on all that we do – you get half, I get half.”

I’m the leader & I’m being more than fair, as I could apportion more to myself than him but I am kind & generous.

The dandelion leaves are like MONEY. And this is a large amount.

And so, I begin to count the leaves, one by one by one. They are all small to medium, some have tiny soft thin stem clumps, which are special, I let him have the one that comes up.

This goes on & on & on as there are HUNDREDS of leaves. Some are tiny; it’s TEDIOUS to count hundreds of them!

Finally I give up & say,

“This is taking too long. We’ll have to get a SCALE & weigh this, you get half, I get half.

 

*** {DANDELION LEAVES, MANY, THE SAME AS MONEY—I SAY I’M GIVING NICK HALF OF IT ALL—COUNTING IS TIRESOME, WE WILL WEIGH IT & SPLIT IT ETC:   Wow, what amazing symbols. The LEAVES are the PAGES of my life story. So far there’s over a THOUSAND & more to come.

NICK is none other than my spiritual husband who on Aug 14, 2022, died of a drug overdose.

I’ll need help on this, Mother God. Is this saying that Nick is important in my life story? Perhaps the PRODUCERS of the movie/s will want to feature him strongly. What am I giving him half the credit for?

 RASA44 RASA45 X RASA45 RASA50 RASA51 RASA52 RASA54

MG: My guess is that he, in his death or from the grave, will be an important part of your life story for the movie producers. They could start with the end of your life, being in love with him & he you, then his dramatic death, then a flashback of your entire life, ending with your relationship with him.

The reason this might be a choice for them is that in most stories a focal point is a relationship. Most great stories feature a relationship as a thread through the entire tale, it brings cohesion to it, a meaning or foundation. It’s hard to think of a great movie or book that does NOT feature a relationship as an ongoing thread.

Using Nick in this way is expedient, as he is dead & does not have to give his PERMISSION & he can’t SUE – using his persona is extremely convenient. Add to that the IMAGES you took of him – they are amazing, & again, they only have to pay you, not him. It simplifies everything for his character.

If he were living you would have to INVENT a persona that would represent him, you could not use his name, identity or exact story line without paying him – it could get complicated, & if you didn’t abide by the rules the producers could have a hefty lawsuit. His part would DIMINISH as if you told more & more details of his persona it would sound so much like him he could sue saying it is him, you’re using his identity without paying him, so he could sue. So to prevent a lawsuit his part might become tiny instead of big. But now he can’t sue, you can put as many details as you wish, lay out all the truth & you are SAFE. He died at a convenient time in a convenient way that makes for great drama.

You are not looking at this in a sentimental or maudlin way as you warned him repeatedly he would die young, you gave him a way out, he chose his destiny. So he gave you something in death, – you are acknowledging him for it here – in the last book, Part 8 – his Chapter had 78 pages – more than any other Chapter & there’s more to come.

 

ME: So the LEAVES I am splitting with him refers to not so much the book but the SCRIPT of the movie? He will have an important part? And even if his character does not take up 50% of the space, the fact that he & I had a deep relationship with our age gap makes him stand out as a main character?

MG: You are giving him importance, attention, respect. You put a great value on him & this value will be appreciated in your life story & it will come back to you as money.} ***

Then momentarily I see he took his half & there is a large skillet here, about a foot or more across, & he has put his large hamburger patty – about 5” across, on it, with two sides of vegetables, & I see bits of the dandelions sticking out from under the patty.

“Oh, you’re going to cook yours with the patty?”

I ask him, & he says yes.

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*** {5” HAMBURGER PATTY – HE PUTS IT IN A SKILLET WITH VEGGIES, I SEE THE DANDELION LEAVES, BIT, STICKING OUT UNDE THE PATTY & ASK HIM IS HE COOKING HIS PART WITH HIS BURGER? I need help here, Mother God. He’s dead so he isn’t eating any food. What is he cooking with the value of the leaves under the burger with veggies on the side?

 

MG: The burger is him – his DEATH. His meat or flesh is dead. The patty is extra large. His life will become ‘larger than life’ by being a part of your story.

Getting ready to be cooked with things ‘on the side’ is his story. It will be PREPARED, ready for DIGESTION. It will be a source of NOURISHMENT for readers, they will learn from his example how NOT to be – it’s a sad tale, a story of his mistakes, forfeiting success & happiness for drugs, then death.

ME: Again I ask for clarity, Mother God. Why is he specifically here, being shown as so important I’m giving him half the value of my life story?

MG: Reread what I said with our first question. It’s about relationship.

Think, for example, of Jane Eyre or WutheringHeights.

Jane Eyre, the whole story is based on Rochester, but there are many ‘sides’ or items told.

The same with WutheringHeights. Heathcliff is the main interest although many other things happen.

So your tale could be told – at the end of your life you met the man you loved who loved you, then he dies suddenly before you can merge successfully, live together. It’s Gothic, it’s tragic.

You spent your whole life dating hundreds of males, which you describe, among other things, & finally, at age 66 you find him. The story gets dodgy – all the other guys were unsuitable. But the love of your life is PSYCHOTIC & he dies suddenly of an overdose – maybe suicide. This is DRAMA.

He did not, space wise, take up half your life, but the drama of what happened here is strong & can be used effectively. Eleven years on & off with him also is not a short time.} ***

 

(3) The blankets. Then I look down my yard & am upset to see the animals have somehow got hold of my valuable blankets. One of them is walking out of the barn, like a human, with a light blue blanket around her & then a precious rose red smaller one {very soft & special} around that. As she walks she drags the blanket into the ground, {it’s an animal in the shape of a human female} some mud, & other blankets were also commandeered by my animals, which I must make a stop to immediately before they destroy all of them beyond repair.

So I run down there with my assistant – a young male – & grab the blankets from the animals. Before I put them into the washing machine I see we have a ‘pool’ here of clear water, right on the ground in our yard, & I swish the blankets in this pool, which is like a sink, water running into it, then out. It’s a rocky terrain, not muddy, they come out clean.

There are other blankets also & I scurry up the hill in my yard to some common or public pools similar to mine. They are right by a path, & down this path I see several dreary men coming down, & the pools, which have various colored stones, shades of brown & grey, are not as clean as mine.

The dreary men look at me, it makes me uncomfortable, like their faces are clouded & veiled by their own skin & the pools are not clear, so I go back to my original pool which is perfect.

The thing is I had all these blankets & they are extremely valuable & they are for ME. I had set aside other things for the animals – they cannot have these blankets! So there must be order & right appropriation here. Animals don’t know any better, it’s my job to manage things.

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*** {MEANING: This is about making sure the spirituality of your life story comes through that folks do not take it as a ‘thing of the flesh’ or animal instinct.

It is you wearing the ‘blankets’ which represent possibly SEX. {The RED ONE is the pain you endured}

You describe & explain many affairs, but again, it’s important to state that during the time you were ‘having fun’ it was God that sent you out to do that. There was a reason you aren’t exactly sure of yet.

The men by the murky public pool who have the veils over their faces – they are dreary – are the men or humans who cannot see ‘the other side of the veil’ or the spiritual content of things.

You do not want to portray your sex experiences in that ‘dirty,’ ‘unclean’ or non-spiritual fashion.

Your life is not ‘of the flesh,’ you are a woman of God, not living for the flesh alone, indeed you are made of clay but that clay is animated with the Spirit of God & you obey that Spirit.

Who is the young man helping you? A Guardian Angel? Or does it refer to Nick, that it’s important to stress the spirituality of you being together?} ***

{For Heaven & Nick channeling, see the Arnold dreams on the Rasa Von Werder-William blog}

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College of Matriarchal Love, College of the Gender War, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Mr Universe Chris Dickerson

Part 3 written 10-15-22

Part 2   written 10-14-22  

Chapter 14 Lovers &/or Friends with 9 Mr Universes – Mr Americas   written 10-13-22

chris-dickerson-1967 

          And then there was Chris Dickerson, a marvel of a man. For his entrance into the NABBA Mr Universe, see the part about Boyer Coe.

          Chris had been victorious.

          I think it was BEFORE the show he already had a fan club, dozens of men sitting around him at a couple party tables. I was the only woman admiring him. {What happens to all these women in the contest? Never saw them again. Most are so self absorbed they don’t know there’s a world outside of themselves.}

          What impressed me about Chris, that I had in common with him, is he was an OPERA SINGER! We discussed opera, I was ga-ga about it, bought records of it, followed Franco Corelli & saw him twice at the Metropolitan Opera in NYC – even saw him face to face twice, once in front of his dressing room, another time outside after his ‘Aiida.’

          So that was a big gab fest.

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It did not go without notice that Chris was gay & I wondered how much of this adulation had to do with gay on gay love. It seemed an abnormally big crowd just to admire one man, although Arnold always had tons of gawkers – but then Arnold is Arnold.

So that was that, but we exchanged numbers & addresses & I got an INVITATION to his apartment for Christmas!

A huge, luxurious apartment in NYC in a good neighborhood. His bedroom, a king-sized bed – everything well appointed.

There were few women, about 30 people I’d say, & no one I knew, only Chris.

All I can recall is asking him how he made money & he did so he said with selling supplements with his own picture on them. He showed me & looked amazing.

This was 1974. Years later he trained at the same club I did – Zinn’s in Queens, he showed up just once. I had my daughter working out there & she spoke to him.

You might not know this, but all well-known body builders trained FOR FREE in all the gyms in NYC. Not sure what happened other areas. I was given the star treatment by Mr. Zinn also.

An anecdote re Zinn.

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He was about to do a major advertisement in a magazine for his gym – he hired models from an agency. I told him I would pose for FREE but he didn’t want me. I was only 35 in 1980 but he made me feel OLD. He hadn’t said it in WORDS but gave that impression. I was in the best shape of my life, I knew no model from an agency could top me.

On the appointed day all were to meet at the gym at 9am sharp – then go to a professional studio after. For me to get up at like 6:30am to get there was a major effort, but I did it, put on all my makeup & etc.

I went there & tried to persuade Zinn to use me for the shots – but he refused.

I was so hurt & angry I cried in the dressing room. And on one cup of coffee – not food – I did 90 reps – a record for me. I had been on a starvation diet & was ripped – relatively speaking. Without drugs there’s a limit to what you can do.

OK so Zinn got his karma. During the shoot, all his men – who came from our gym – tried to steal stuff, like shorts. They were caught. But one guy was given a $1,500 watch to wear & that disappeared. I suspect who it was, but they weren’t sure.

They told Zinn that unless he paid for the watch, they would not release the photos. He’d already paid the pro models, & a deposit for the studio, so it was a loss. Of course Zinn refused to pay that watch {$5,391. value in 2022}. It was idiotic they gave it to one guy to wear – who the fuck wears expensive watches when they train?

And so, his karma for not allowing me to pose FOR FREE was that layout, which he had such high hopes for, was never used. His hopes were dashed.

He wasn’t a genius of promotion. Had he been, when Chris was there, he could have had him pose with me for images. And then he could have used those pics for the body building magazines – several were popular then -Under the title,

“Mr. Universe Chris Dickerson & Miss Body Beautiful Kellie Everts training at Zinn’s gym.”

Even without Chris, I could have been an item, but he had that weird prejudice that I was ‘old.’

Shortly after that a call came in from Vogue magazine. They wanted a female body builder for a major layout.

Zinn again, laughed at the idea that they would want me. In his mind only females from 18 to 22 could be desirable. He reluctantly gave me the message, thinking,

“When they see how old she is, they won’t want her.”

So I called them & they asked me to come over. My daughter was training with me – she was a gymnast, beautiful, well built & in good shape. I took her so if they wanted SUPER YOUNG they could choose her.

But they chose me. Razz up your azz Zinn. {To be continued}

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College of God & Love, College of Matriarchal Love, Core Tenets, Uncategorized

Mr Universe Lovers

 

 

Chapter 14 Lovers &/or Friends with 9 Mr Universes – Mr Americas

   written 10-13-22

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          Some were famous, some not. Some known mostly to body builders, one is a household word. Let’s start with the unknown Vern Weaver. I was startled to read he COMMITTED SUICIDE! 

Above is Franco Columbu, in Sardinia, below Vern Weaver

Doug White photo 

Vern Weaver the 1963 AAU Mr. America

Forty contestants entered the 1963 AAU Mr. America contest held at the Zembo Mosque in Harrisburg, Pennsylvania.

In second place was the legendary African American Harold Poole, who walked off stage when his placing was announced. However, Poole had the consolation of winning the Most Muscular award.

Weaver won the tall man’s division at the 1964 NABBA Amateur Mr. Universe. His final physique competition was at the 1966 NABBA Professional Mr. Universe contest where he placed second in the tall man class.

Little is recorded regarding Vern Weaver from 1966 onward. It is known he took his life in 1993, at age 56

My Account:

It was an image of me as ‘Miss Body Beautiful USA’ 1965, in ‘Strength & Health’ magazine, that brought Vern Weaver to my door.

He wrote me a letter saying I was ‘the most beautiful woman he had ever seen’!

I answered him. I was 20 years old; ambitious to become a ‘somebody’ & he was Mr. America. He wrote from NY on his way to CA, he invited me to a show that was disastrous which altered the course of my life.

Yes, I was married, yes, we made love so I was ‘cheating’ but believe me, Stanley Everts deserved to be cheated on. He had forced me to marry him, tricked me into getting pregnant, & tried to strangle me to death twice. He deserved his 55 years in Purgatory.

All I can remember ‘doing’ with Vern is getting him a modeling job & he appeared in a sportswear catalog. He looked really strange, with all those muscles, next to skinny undeveloped male models. They looked astonished at him.

And at this show he took me to I met Bill Pearl & Mr Southern California, Bill McCardle with his photographer. The photographer said he’d put me on the cover of Strength & Health if I would pose with the champ – I agreed, the rest is ‘history.’

I have the account elsewhere, plus on my Kellie Everts bio website, let me skip the grim details here & move to

Harold Poole  {below}

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His Story on Wikipedia:

Harold Poole (December 25, 1943 – August 7, 2014) was

an AAUIFBB and WBBG professional bodybuilder.

Biographyedit

Born in Louisville, Kentucky Poole’s athleticism was apparent very early on. He was quarterback on his football team at Shortridge High School in Indianapolis, placed fourth in the state high school wrestling championships, ran 440 yards in 50 seconds and put the 12 pound shot 55 feet.

In 1960, Poole entered the AAU Mr. America and, at the age of 16, took 18th place. His final AAU teen opportunity came in June 1963, where he won most muscular, but was the runner-up to Vern Weaver. Three months later, Poole switched to the IFBB and, at age 19, he won the Mr. Universe. In 1964, he became the first African-American to be named IFBB Mr. America. Starting in 1965, Poole became the only man to compete in the first three Mr. Olympia contests finishing runner-up to Larry Scott in the first two Olympias.

He retired from bodybuilding competition following the 1982 IFBB Night Of Champions, where he placed outside the top 10. He lived in Florida, where he continued to train with weights and practice martial arts until the end of 2010, when he moved to New York City. He was inducted to the IFBB Hall of Fame in 2004 and the WBBG Hall of Fame in 2007. In 2008, Poole was voted the Greatest Teenage Bodybuilder of All-Time.

Harold Poole died in New York City on August 7, 2014.[1]

Competition and award history

He was the IFBB Mr Universe 1963 – Mr USA IFBB 1971 – 1964 Mr America – Many other big trophies in top contests

My Account:

          It all started with another woman. She was wild about him, although she was in love with another man!

          This is not going to be a pretty story.

          This lady hounded me to make love to Harold Poole until I gave in, & later regretted it. I was not big on sex then, it goes in stages with me, sometimes yes, sometimes no. For then it was no. It was prior to 1976, maybe “74 or “75. I had just gotten back from CA in 1972 & settling in to NYC, just wanted to be left alone, but she wouldn’t leave it be.

          I know it was just because she wanted to experience him again through me – she’d bedded him & he didn’t want any more, but most men will try another woman, especially if she’s good looking. Let’s call this friend Angelina.

          I want to make this short as it’s unpleasant thinking about it – I know that’s the case with many men, but that’s human nature it is not angelic, it is animal nature or below that.

          So, anyway, he took me to his den. He was living with a young lady – I met her later. But he had a wing separate from his regular digs where he housed a bed as well as mega loads of weight equipment. There on that bed we made love about 10 times. It was a lot of work on both our parts, believe me, I did my share, lol.

Angelina gloated in the details – she was living through me. Yes, Harold was handsome & sexy, his body was a turn on, he had what it takes. I thought he was Mexican, I only found out later he was black by reading he was the ‘first black Mr. America.’

I read he endured wicked discrimination when they gave the title first to Vern Weaver, he was only second – everyone was shocked. The promoters were mega-racists & this was a great hardship to break through, but of course, eventually they did.

But let me say this & it hurts. All these guy were sensitive to their own travails, but not to those of women. They did not for one second think about how women were treated in the body building contests or elsewhere. Harold, like a typical handsome, sexy young man, got what he wanted & moved on. We met 3 times, then he lost interest. I went to his club & he was putting the make on a new female – he resented my intrusion.

I called again & he ignored me – it hurt.

But here is the worst part. I went into a strange depression after being involved with him, I couldn’t work or function, I didn’t know what to do. I thought was this rejection after an infatuation, just that?

I called my mentor, Rev Verna, in CA, begging for help. She saw the situation right away, & whatever bad I said about her, she came through at times with Supernatural healings. She said to me a tidbit I never heard of,

“He put a cloak of darkness on you.”

WHAT? Is Harold Poole some sort of demon? She said some of those magic words – from God – don’t recall what – & the spell was broken, a quasi-exorcism I suppose.

Within that second I was cured, Harold Poole disappeared from my mind, & I learned a valuable lesson. Demons can appear as angels of light. Some of the most handsome men are the most evil, & you can’t tell by looks or making love. It is deep inside, in the heart. Good bye Harold Poole, wherever you are, I hope its peace & you met your maker. If not, it has nothing to do with me.

Mickey Hargitay – Mr Universe

Mickey_Hargitay_1964

See Chapter 4!

Franco Columbu – Mr Universe, Mr Olympia & many other important titles

          He’ll go down in my history as the one I cuckolded Arnold with, & boy, did I pay for that. Here he is on Wikipedia:

Francesco Maria Columbu[3] (August 7, 1941 – August 30, 2019) was an Italian bodybuilderpowerlifter, actor, author, producer, and a licensed chiropractor.

Originally a boxer, Columbu won the Mr. Olympia in 1976 and 1981, and competed in the inaugural edition of the World’s Strongest Man in 1977, where he placed fifth.[4] He also had an acting career and authored numerous books on bodybuilding and nutrition. Columbu was inducted into the IFBB Hall of Fame in 2001, and received the Arnold Classic Lifetime Achievement Award in 2009.[5]

Columbu moved to Germany at a young age for work,[3] and met Arnold Schwarzenegger in 1965 at a bodybuilding competition in Stuttgart, Germany.[7][8] Columbu formed a lifelong friendship with Schwarzenegger,[9] and was Schwarzenegger’s best man for his marriage to Maria Shriver in 1986 and godfather to their daughter Christina.[10][11][12] Columbu and Schwarzenegger remained very close friends until Columbu’s death, with Schwarzenegger stating in 2016 “He was my favourite training partner four decades ago and he is my favourite training partner today.”[13]

With Schwarzenegger, Columbu moved to California in the late 1960s to train and work with Joe Weider.[6] Weider provided them with a place to live and an $80 (equivalent to $590 in 2021) per week stipend.[14] The stipend was not enough to live on, so to support their bodybuilding careers, they began a bricklaying company named European Brick Works in 1969.[12]

At 5 ft 5 in (1.65 m) and a competition weight of around 185 pounds (84 kg), Columbu won the IFBB Mr. Europe and Mr. Universe titles in 1970, and the 1971 IFBB Mr. World. He won the lightweight class of the 1974 and 1975 IFBB Mr. Olympias, before winning the overall competition for the first time in 1976.[15]

Columbu participated in the inaugural edition of the World’s Strongest Man in 1977. He placed fifth, behind four men who outweighed him by around 100 pounds (45 kg).[16] During the event, he dislocated his left knee while carrying a refrigerator on his back.[6] The injury kept him out of competition for a few years, and he received a reported $1 million (equivalent to $4.5 million in 2021) in compensation.[17] Columbu returned to win the 1981 Mr. Olympia then retired from competition.[15]

Known for his strength, Columbu’s clean and jerk record was 400 pounds (181 kg), his bench press record was 525 pounds (238 kg), his squat record was 655 pounds (297 kg), and his deadlift record was 750 pounds (340 kg).[1][6] He was named in The Guinness Book of Records in 1978 for bursting a hot water bottle by blowing into it, which he achieved in 55 seconds.[5]        

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My Account

 

         I’ve told this story so many times I’m weary of it, usually in the accounts of Arnold & myself.

          In 1972 I went to the body building men’s & women’s contest at the Brooklyn Academy of Music, knowing Franco & Arnold would be there.

I was interested in Franco – he was my type at the time – & brought along a magazine with him on the cover, for him to autograph.

I saw the two of them sitting together, went behind them & showed Franco his magazine. Sometime snapped an image of Arnold popping eyes at my cleavage, there it was later in magazines.

Anyway, Arnold was a boob man I guess & he convinced me to go backstage – way back there, with him & as he had this magnetic will power I couldn’t resist, I followed him.

While we were starting to ‘make love’ a big black guy came by, Arnold had his back to him, front to me so didn’t see it. Then comes Franco, pissed saying,

“Kellie, I thought you were MY girl”

That stopped Arnold in his tracks. I exclaimed,

“I can be BOTH your girl”

and Arnold bellowed

“NO!”

So that ended that.

The next day I’m in the room with Franco, making love. I didn’t think about it – but these two were like twins & shared the room & Arnold WALKS IN!

From then on, Arnold, for this & a few things I DID NOT DO, had a vendetta against me of sorts, playing tricks & also blocking my promotion as the original female body builder. I know he & Joe Weider were partners in trying to steal my thunder & hand it over to Lisa Lyon or other women as the originators or the ones who deserved all the accolades. Eventually I won the recognition as Progenitor in the eyes of all, but it was a struggle.

 

So I had this date with Franco & later, he came to see me as my sister’s place where we had pictures taken. I was mad at him for something & did not go to make love again. Arnold had invited him to some fancy dinner & he went there instead of to me – so I held a grudge.

And that was the end of us except we saw each other again at a show in 1980, where Arnold pointed to him & said,

“There’s Franco,”

and he was with his wife – Arnold still resented my choosing him.

Jeez, what hurtful memories I have in body building.

 

However, Franco came to me again, this time when DEAD! I have a deep ministry to Purgatory – he was there & came to me for help. I helped. He is still there. When he ascends, I will be informed through a dream. Amen.

 

I was friends – not lovers – with 4 other Mr. Universe / Mr Americas – Reg Lewis, Denis Tinerino, Boyer Coe & Chris Dickerson. {To be continued}

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