By Rasa Von Werder, December 6th, 2020




12-5-20-Heavenly dreams -

(2)  Dream explains my Lover Bob’s relationship with his wife / drug partner

Ruthie will end soon because she will no longer be able to support him.  

 Her drug habit is eating up her money now – none left for him.

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First, I was ‘bombarded’ with dreams of a Heavenly place – I say bombarded because they appeared fast & furious & went on for a long time. They might have been a result of prayers of forgiveness toward everyone who ever hurt me.

I was in a world of vast prairies, plains, woods, jungles, where all was beautiful, alive & fruitful. The trees were filled with millions of fruits, food everywhere, beauty all over but can remember few details. Sense-image material might have been the documentary ‘Wild Indonesia’ I saw last night – but I watch wild documentaries all the time & don’t get such results.

‘Sense image material’ is when your mind takes ‘sense images’ or images, experiences that you recently had, & USES them to make a point. It does NOT mean you are dreaming about the subject being used – the subject is only a SYMBOL. And so, the sense image was ‘Wild Indonesia’ but with this sort of image God was showing me what Heaven is like – to some degree, in my prayers, I ENTERED HEAVEN. This shows the POWER OF FORGIVENESS.

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When we feel negative thoughts & emotions, we put ourselves into Purgatories & Hells. When we transform the negative into positive, we enter states of Heaven. Like Buddha said, when we hate someone, it is like thinking they will die of a poison we drank. Hate & various nuances of it – bitterness, resentment, revenge, regret, sorrow over it, feeling sorry for ourselves, etc., are all POISONS we consume into our being. What is the remedy that I employed? And the fact that the prayers WORKED says I did it right – I say such prayers many times but don’t always get big results.

It went like this: ‘Anyone or everyone who ever hurt me, God, count it as if they did nothing, nothing to be punished for, as I do not hold a grudge or say they sinned. I want NO REVENGE.’ I mentioned some of those who hurt me the most.
‘I have no resentment, bitterness, sorrow or regret over what they did to me. I accept it, I am not sorry they did it, I simply say it’s part of life. I make no opinion on it any way, I say it’s how it was, I say if God allowed it, God will do something positive with it – it’s God’s business, not mine.’

This disclaimer on my part removed the negative emotions from my life & freed me up for the Heavenly experience – thank you dear God.


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2nd Dream: Girl Wants Vacuum Cleaner – I Help Her but Discover She Took off for Drugs

I am going up the six flights of stairs to my apt in B’klyn, with a young lady who is in her early 20′s. On one of the landings someone has put a nice looking vacuum cleaner ‘for sale.’ It’s partly black, the handle, & the body of it is some sort of orange or red – they made it cheap but this girl HAS NOTHING & needs help. I might add SHE HAS AN INFANT which is some place nearby.

*(YOUNG LADY: By the end of this dream I will figure out this is Ruthie, the common-law wife of my Lover Bob. This dream explains something to me, about her being DESTITUTE.
VACUUM CLEANER: Represents some sort of home convenience, not sure what. It could say ‘I need help with cleaning house.’ This house cleaning might not be literal, it could be cleaning up the SITUATION at home – things are BAD with her & Bob, with their FINANCIAL SITUATION.)*

The neighbor who placed this here watches me as I TEST the vacuum cleaner – it works fine. I do some areas in their apt, it’s great.

I try to negotiate with the owner for the item real cheap – $10, explaining the girl is destitute, with a small child, etc. But they say that’s not possible, but they’ll part with it for $20. I give the girl the $20 to buy it.

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Now this will not be LOGICAL. I don’t know why – but sometimes dreams are not logical but they still make their point.

In an illogical activity I look into my ‘dollar store’ bag, which is not a purse, just a cheap but nice bad – & realize I have NO MONEY IN MY BAG – it’s in my purse upstairs in my apt. This slightly embarrasses me as I think the couple might think I’m a deadbeat, but we are a short walk up my sixth floor. I ask the man of the house, please walk with me to my apt, I will get the $20. from my purse for you.

(*MAN OF THE HOUSE: I suspect this is my lover Bob because of the appearance of my Dad when I go to my apt – Dad is the one to give me away to this future husband, Dad’s presence is usually matrimonial business predicted.)*

And so we go up. I put my key in the hole, before it opens my Dad opens the door for me. He knew it was me. The fact that my Dad is here gives me a good sense of security & love.

When he sees the man to my right he is STARTLED – {the older man has a head like a chipmunk} & I introduce him to Dad as something like ‘Mr. Schultz or Diaz’ – not sure what, I was uncertain of his name, but the man adds,

‘Just Alan’ will do, & I’m not sure if that was the name he said, either. I thought he was Spanish, but again, not sure.

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*(JUST ALAN: I could not recall either name, first or last, but Alan came to my mind now – this might give it away as my good husband’s middle name was Alan. That would be saying, then,

“Lover Bob now appears as your good husband….& so this dream concerns his situation with Ruthie ending, his situation with you must begin. This could explain why.”

DAD is STARTLED: Sometimes Dad’s get bent out of shape when a new man takes away his daughter. My Dad used to get upset {in our apt. in B’klyn, pictured here} when any guy walked me home or visited me – he always had something negative to say. I think this is their lack of ability to let their daughter go.

OPEN THE DOOR, KNEW IT WAS ME: In putting in ‘the key’ I am trying to COMMUNICATE with my Dad – asking him to reveal something to me. His opening the door, knowing it’s me, is he will answer my request, he will reveal to me how Bob breaks off from Ruth & comes to me.)*

I then go to my things to get the money for the man & I suppose I do so. The thing is, the man sees my apt, it is nice but slightly cluttered, there’s a lot of beige on the walls. And I at some point see his apt, which is nice also, cozy.

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*(BEIGE ON THE WALLS, SLIGHTLY CLUTTERED: Too much on my mind, cluttering my brain, but God is here {beige/contemplation} & there is an answer.)*

Having given this old man the money {I might add I always end up being generous with the poor, I surprise myself with the things I’ll do for them. I did not owe this girl anything, but I splurged for her} we go back down a couple flights to see the girl with the baby, see how she’s doing now that she’s got the vacuum.

*(VACUUM: Is a NECESSITY/NEED but this female will forego one basic need & splurge the money for her addiction. This is a BAD SIGN.)*

To our surprise, she is not here. There’s a pile of many layers on the couch, we remove layer after layer of mostly blankets (one is orangey), she is not here, but her baby is, she left her baby alone. Where did she go?

It is revealed to me that she took the money I gave her, went out to get her DRUG FIX. That somehow is her problem, she is a drug addict. The drug is more important than her baby, she has to have it. I was arguing her case because she’s so broke & has the baby to care for. Not sure what to think, just that she is unreliable, certainly not capable of taking care of herself or the child.

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This tells me that the relationship of Ruth & Bob will go bankrupt because Ruth can no longer support them. Her income has diminished, she is now near destitution, but still a drug addict. She will use money for drugs before necessities, she will neglect her child, she will abandon her child’s needs to get her drug.

Bob does not support them, he relies on her support so he can use his own money on himself & his needs including alcohol, grass, cigarettes & drugs. He needs her for the roof over their head & bills. This is what he USES HER FOR.

But this dream says, she can NO LONGER PAY THE BILLS because her income has gone so low, her need of drugs takes away bill-money – she will no longer be useful to Bob.

Who am ‘I’ in the dream, giving her money? I am the Grace of God, supplying her with what she needs as far as bills, necessities. She has, in other words, with her diminished income, enough for what is basic, but what is NOT BASIC – drugs – she doesn’t have enough for. So she will use Peter to pay Paul, the God-given income is enough for sustainability but not her habit.

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Her physical appearance? Attractive, brown hair framing her face to the shoulders, reminds me of the girl I saw in the dream a few days ago – where my Lover Bob appeared as a Hell’s Angel – an old man with a fuzzy flannel shirt came in without being invited to tell me WATCH OUT FOR A GUY WHO IS A THIEF – the thief comes in, works for you, asks for an advance for a forthcoming job – then disappears with your money. This same female STOOD BETWEEN MYSELF & THE OLD MAN.

I now know this female is Ruthie – the ‘wife’ of my Lover Bob – Bob in another form is admitting some wrong doing, some sort of ‘stealing’. Does he get money from Ruthie for drugs? And so, I might not have said it in that dream, but this lady between us is Ruthie.

The dream basically reveals something God has been saying for years – even before this Pandemic – Ruthie’s income in the hospitality business has shrank greatly. My educated guess is she used to make $800 a week, now it’s down to $250-300.  {Think of the cost of the drug cocaine.  How much per day?  I don’t know, but if she uses $30. a day of it, that would be $210. a week.  How much gets left for bills & baby?} If things get worse, she might not have a job, as her field is shrinking, people are desperate for these jobs & there will be more people applying than jobs open. In that case, she will have to rely on relatives for support, especially since she has a baby – or get a new husband. She can no longer afford the gigolo Bob, haha. {She thought she was so smart, providing him with drugs every day, so smart that she could afford it. So smart to get him badly addicted. But all this, by the Grace of God, falls apart. I told her it was temporary. She knew I was right, now it’s happening.)*


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