NONDUALITY IMPROVES A RELATIONSHIP
Interpretation of Dreams for Friends. Many symbols explained.
These first two dreams seem somehow to ‘go together’ or ‘dreamed at the same time,’ ‘side by side’ – although they seem to have no correlation.
First myself & my husband RAJ are standing in my room with the twin beds—we’re in the middle of the room as if the two beds, which are together, are separated.
(*SEPARATED BEDS* AS YOU’RE NOT HAVING SEX)
He’s standing here in a full-length blue robe & going to leave me. I am sort of on the floor by the side of his legs, holding his robe & saying,
(*FULL LENGTH BLUE ROBE* TOTALLY DEPRESSED {not partially as that could be a short robe})
“I’m sorry – I’m sorry.
Don’t leave me, I have nothing without you.”
(THIS HEARKENS BACK TO YOUR *PTSD WHEN YOU WERE SEPARATED FROM DAD*. IT BROKE YOUR HEART – HE WAS EVERYTHING TO YOU BUT YOU LOST HIM. EVERY AFFAIR YOU HAVE THAT’S NOT WORKING TRIGGERS THIS PTSD. THAT’S WHY IT’S SO INTENSE. YOU WERE *‘BROUGHT TO YOUR KNEES’* MEANS YOU WERE *HELPLESS*.)
He’s very sad, his hair is half grey, lots of white, he’s determined to leave.
(HAIR TURNING GREY, ESPECIALLY WHITE IS ANXIETY. HIS ANXIETY IS GREAT RE YOU—
BUT THE LEAVING SYMBOL IS NOT REALLY HIS DESIRE TO LEAVE YOU—IT’S YOUR ATTACHMENT DECREASING, *he’s leaving you as a mental obsession*–THE HUMAN ATTACHMENT THAT IS NOT GOOD, IF IT REMAINS YOU’RE NOT ‘FREE.’
WHAT WE CALL ‘FREEDOM’ IN SPIRITUALITY IS HEAVEN ON EARTH. AS LONG AS ONE HAS ATTACHMENT THEY CANNOT BE HAPPY—BUDDHISM TEACHES THIS, SO DO SOME CHRISTIANS, SO DOES NONDUALITY. ATTACHMENT MEANS ANXIETY, IT MAKES ONE WORRY. YOU CAN’T BE HAPPY & WORRIED/ANXIOUS AT THE SAME TIME.)
Right now also my niece Zarzilla has arrived with her little son. She’s brought me several items of clothing which she’s joyful about, & she lays them out on the bedroom bureau for me to see.
One item is a little grey-violet vest, knitted with large openings between stitches, (the vest is open, there are no fasteners) with PEARLS sewn in here & there, the other two or three items also have pearls, & every garment is neat as a pin, & so small, he must weigh no more than thirty pounds. She’s smiling. I’m rather startled as I’ve not seen her for ages nor heard from her, & here she’s popped up out of the blue.
(AS I SUSPECTED, THIS IS NOT ABOUT YOUR NIECE BUT ABOUT YOU DEVELOPING A NEW PERSONALITY-ATTITUDE REGARDING RAJ. ZARZILLA IS YOUR NEW PHYSICAL SELF & THE BABY IS YOUR HUSBAND RAJ.
RAJ HAS RISEN UP, SO HAVE YOU—WHICH IS GREAT FOR THE RELATIONSHIP. ONE OF THE SIGNS RAJ HAS CHANGED IS HOW LITTLE HE IS – BEING A SMALL CHILD IS SHRINKING IN HUMILITY, LIKE WE ARE ALL TINY CHILDREN BEFORE THE GREATNESS OF GOD.
THE LITTLE VEST GREY/VIOLET SHOWS A HIGHER LIGHT IS REACHING HIS HEART & MIND–*VEST* GOES OVER THE HEART & WHEN VESTS ARE OPEN THEY REPRESENT *WINGS*, THE COLOR GREY IS MIND, VIOLET IS A RAREFIED SPIRITUAL LIGHT. HE HAS RISEN UP. YOU ARE ALSO GETTING WISER REGARDING HIM.
NEXT, PEARLS ARE EXTREMELY TELLING SYMBOLS OF INCREASED UNDERSTANDING – ‘PEARLS OF WISDOM.’ SINCE THEY ARE VARIOUS GARMENTS BOTH UPPER & LOWER BODY, HE HAS IMPROVED ON SEVERAL LEVELS OR IN WAYS. {SO HAVE YOU.}
*GARMENTS: GARMENTS HAVE TO DO WITH WHO WE ARE, HOW WE ACT, WHAT WE ARE DOING. SOULS WHO ARE ASCENDING INTO HEAVEN MORE OFTEN THAN NOT, ARE SEEN IN FEMININE GARB—EVEN MEN—BECAUSE WE ARE ALL PASSIVE TO GOD. GOD IS THE POWER & GIVER OF GRACE, WE ARE THE RECEIVERS.
*FEMININE IS THE TRADITIONAL SYMBOL FOR PASSIVE BECAUSE DURING SEX THE MAN PUTS THE PENIS/SPERM INTO HER BODY, HE IS THE AGGRESSOR, SHE IS THE RECEIVER. IT DOES NOT MEAN ALL WOMEN ARE PASSIVE OR ALL MEN AGGRESSIVE.*
EVIL SOULS THAT DO NOT CONTAIN THE GRACE OF GOD, WHEN PERCEIVED BY US, ARE ‘SHADOW FIGURES, DARK ENTITIES, BLACKER THAN BLACK,’ THESE HAVE NO GARB OR CLOTHING OF LIGHT. GOOD SOULS CARRY LIGHT OR ARE TRANSPARENT, TRANSLUCENT.
WHEN A PROPHET ‘GIVES THEIR MANTLE’ TO THE NEXT PROPHET IT MEANS THEIR ‘CLOTHING OF LIGHT’ – THE ANOINTING OR POWER OF GOD WHICH THEY ‘CARRY.’*
*SOMEONE WEARING BRIGHT RED WOULD BE RECENT SUFFERINGS, RED CAN ALSO MEAN ‘SANGUINE,’ LIKE ZEALOUS OR FULL OF ENERGY, PURPLE IS OLD OR PROLONGED SUFFERINGS, CAN MEAN ALSO ‘BEEN BEATEN’ AS YOU GET PURPLE SKIN, GARBED IN BLACK IS USUALLY DEPRESSION, A FUNERAL OR ENDING, OR A MYSTERY, LIKE ‘GOD IS DARKNESS OR BLACKNESS TO US—WHO UNDERSTANDS GOD?” IN THIS DREAM RAJ WEARS A STRONG BLUE ROBE, THAT’S SADNESS. VIVID GREEN ROBES ARE STRONG LIFE, YELLOW CLOTHING COULD BE FEAR OR HAPPINESS LIKE ‘SUNSHINE.’ THERE ARE MANY INTERPRETATIONS FOR COLORS.*
*CLOTHING ALSO HAS MEANING IN BEING DRAPED, PLEATED, TRANSLUCENT, TRANSPARENT, WOOL OR COTTON, SATIN, VELVET, VOLUMINOUS OR SPARSE, LEATHER OR LACE, HUGE VARIETY OF CLOTHING, GARB, HATS, SHOES, COLORS, SHAPES, SIZES ALL HAVE MEANING & ALL MUST BE DISCERNED IN THE CONTEXT OF THE DREAM. (To be explained elsewhere)*
ZARZILLA/YOU IS SMILING BECAUSE OF THE IMPROVEMENT—YOU’RE NOT ANXIOUS ANY MORE, YOU’VE GOT JOY. IT’S BOTH OF YOU CLOSER TO TRUTH. IN SEVERAL DREAMS IT WAS SHOWN THAT HE HAS CHANGED DRASTICALLY—SO HAVE YOU. BY YOU ‘LETTING GO’, NOT BEING ANXIOUS, HE CAN’T CONTROL YOU ANY MORE BY THE REIGNS OF DESIRE, YOU ARE FREE. HE NOW SEES THE ONUS IS ON HIM TO DO SOMETHING – HE WILL HAVE TO BEND OR BREAK IF HE WANTS YOU & THE SHOE IS ON THE OTHER FOOT, YOU ARE HAPPY & FREE, BUT HIS WHITE HAIR SHOWS HE ISN’T.)
After the initial ‘neat’ scene she comes back again & clutters up my whole house – which doesn’t make me happy.
(CLUTTERING UP MY HOUSE WOULD BE MESSING UP MY MIND—WHERE YOU LIVE IS YOUR MIND, SOUL, SPIRIT, CONSCIOUSNESS. *This persona is a character within you, one you create, by changing your thoughts, each personality within us has its ideas/feelings, like characters in a movie or play. Some of your new thoughts are not ‘sorted out,’ they are messy or DISORGANIZED. You will see momentarily the SOURCE of these new {not accessed for years} thoughts are from the Hindu gurus.
(WHEN YOU FIRST ACCESSED THESE NONDUALITY TEACHERS THEY EXPLAINED WELL, BUT THEN YOU HIT MURKY ONES THAT WERE NOT CLEAR.)
There also seems like another scene where Raj tells me he’s leaving, but I can’t recall details.
(THE ENTIRE SEQUENCES OF ‘RAJ LEAVING’ ARE BECAUSE NONDUALITY TEACHINGS ARE HELPING YOU LET HIM GO—BEING SECURE, NOT CLINGING, NOT HELPLESS, NOT AFRAID. IF HE IS YOURS, HE’S YOURS–WHATEVER GOD DECREES WILL TRANSPIRE. IF GOD DOES NOT WILL IT, IT HAS TO FALL AWAY. IF GOD WILLS IT, LET IT COME TO PASS.
IN NONDUALITY ONE DOES NOT ATTACH TO ANYTHING—PEOPLE, THINGS, DESIRES – NOTHING. THIS SOUNDS IMPOSSIBLE, BUT IT ISN’T. GOD PERMITS ALL THAT IS NEEDED, ALL THAT IS KARMICALLY RIGHT – ALL THAT IS GOOD FOR THE SOUL, & ALL THAT IS BAD FALLS AWAY. YOU MUST TRUST THAT. LIKE JESUS SAID, FIRST, ‘LET THIS CUP PASS’…BUT THEN ADDED, ‘THY WILL, NOT MINE BE DONE.’ NEVER SHOULD YOU DESIRE ANYTHING NOT GOD’S WILL, IT WILL BE BAD FOR YOU.)
Not only has she messed up the whole house, but she has brought some of her relatives & a whole line of male friends who are from India or another Eastern place where they look like that. They are all young-middle aged, decent looking, energetic & healthy businessmen. After a while they want to do some business here, like it’s only a social visit, but they are so eager to move forward–they want to do something to accelerate a venture.
Some of these men are lined up against the wall, while others are here & there –they are wearing bright clothes, like one has on an orange t-shirt with brown pants, all have strong-colored clothes & some of them, certainly the one in orange, have brown skin. They seem active & happy.
(THESE MEN ARE THE HINDU/YOGA SAINTS YOU’VE BEEN STUDYING RECENTLY. THEY ARE HERE IN YOUR MIND, CHANGING YOU INTO ZARZILLA!
WHY ARE THEY WEARING STRONG-COLORED CLOTHES – ESPECIALLY THIS ONE YOU NOTICE IN ORANGE? USUALLY BRIGHT COLORS INDICATE ‘OF THE EARTH’—NOT THE DEAD, BECAUSE FROM WHERE WE ARE WE DON’T SEE THE DEAD AS ‘COLORFUL,’ WE SEE SOMEONE DYING TURNING GREY, OR THE BLOOD LEAVING THEIR BODY. THIS ONE IN ORANGE IS THE BEST TEACHER—ORANGE IS THE COLOR OF AN EASTERN MONK’S ROBES, ALTHOUGH THIS MAN IS EUROPEAN – DAVID GODMAN TEACHING THE GOSPEL OF RAMANA MAHARSHI.)
These men – there’s four or five of them – we really have a house full – there also seem to be a couple male relatives of hers here ask me if they can make some COPIES on my printer. I tell them I don’t have one. They say
“What? You are in business to do xxxx? & don’t have a printer? That would seem a necessity.”
I had bragged to them about being a successful business woman, well off, & the impression they got was I had lots of clients, etc. But then, I have to clarify,
(THIS BRAGGING IS NO DOUBT COMMENTS YOU PLACED ON YOU TUBE VIDEOS WHERE YOU GAVE IMPRESSIONS OF YOURSELF THAT WERE PUFFED-UP, OR RATHER PEOPLE MISUNDERSTOOD & THINK YOU’RE A ‘BIG OPERATOR.’)
“I only have one client, & that is the Catholic Church. I work for them without pay.”
Indeed, I did my work for charity, it was not what they imagined. This might refer to Holy Masses & prayers of the Catholic Church.
(WHAT IS THE PRINTER? THAT SOUNDS LIKE COPY OR REPETITION. IT MIGHT MEAN PROMOTING THEIR TEACHINGS. OF COURSE YOU ARE PROMOTING THEIR TEACHINGS ON THE INTERNET AS YOU LEARN THEM. THESE MEN ARE ZEALOUS FOR THEIR CAUSE; THEY WANT OTHERS, LIKE YOU, TO PARTICIPATE.
YOU DO MAKE A DISCLAIMER THAT YOU ARE WORKING FOR THE CATHOLICCHURCH—INDEED YOU HAVE PROMOTED THIS WAY ALL YOUR LIFE & (NOT SAYING YOU NEGLECTED YOGA, BUT YOU ARE FOCUSED ON JESUS’ WAYS AS TAUGHT BY THE CATHOLIC THEOLOGY.)
There’s also much to do with the little son of Zar. I explain something,
It’s kind of like we’re having a ‘forum’ – like disclosing secrets of WHAT HAS HURT US – bringing things INTO THE OPEN. Zar seems to be wearing a light blue printed top & bottom & is standing against the wall in front of a doorway, & a few of her people are between us scattered about.
(TO SAY SOMEONE IS *‘AGAINST THE WALL’* IS TO SAY THEY *CAN’T GET AWAY*. HERE THE DREAMER {CALLED ‘ME’ OR ‘I’-IT IS THE GOD SELF OR WHAT MAHARSHI & OTHERS CALL PLAIN ‘SELF.’} HAS THIS PERSONA AS A CAPTIVE AUDIENCE, SHE CANNOT RESIST THE WORDS.
HER OUTFIT IS FEMININE, HINTING SHE IS TAKING IN THE GOD-WORDS.)
I say to her sincerely,
“Do you know WHAT HURT ME THE MOST? When you visited me with the baby you never offered me to hold him & I was afraid to ask. I don’t think I ever TOUCHED him at all!”
She seems to be HOLDING HIM now & says,
“What did you ever give me?”
I answer,
“I GAVE YOU MY DNA!”
Focusing on those words I see the injustice of her attitude & also that the child of hers, whose love she denies me, also has my DNA.
(I SUSPECT HERE THAT WE’RE TALKING ABOUT SPIRITUAL DNA. THE GOD-SELF IS SAYING THAT THE FLESH PREVENTED GOD POWER FROM TOUCHING THE ‘BABY’ WHO IS ACTUALLY RAJ, THE HUSBAND.
*HE IS YOUR CHILD FOR MORE THAN ONE REASON. ONE BEING THAT HE IS A CHILD OF GOD & YOU CAME TO CLAIM HIM FOR GOD’S REALM. YOU GOT HIM AWAY FROM MANY DEMONS.*
Then we’re on a large bed, & her son appears in the form of about a ten pound cat with long fuzzy hair, & he is sort of pouncing about the bed, I catch him & hold him as I would a cat, loving him, & saying,
“You were afraid of me, now I guess you’re not.”
(THIS LONG-HAIRED BEAUTIFUL GREY CAT HAS GOTTEN TAMER OVER THE YEARS. SHE USED TO BE AFRAID BUT VISITED & ATE OUTSIDE. JUST A FEW DAYS AGO SHE DECIDED TO STAY IN THE KITCHEN, EAT & SLEEP THERE DAY & NIGHT. PRIOR TO THAT IT HAD BEEN STAY TWELVE HOURS AT THE MOST, PERCHING ON TOP OF A RAG BIN THAT HAS A NICE COVER LIKE A NEST—THEN LEAVE & COME BACK. THERE’S NOW A THICK COAT ON A CHAIR NEAR THE HEAT VENT, THIS IS HER FAVORITE SPOT AS IT’S 50 DEGREES IN THE KITCHEN BUT THIS SPOT IS WARMER.
HER PERSONALITY CHANGED, HER FEAR LEFT, AND THAT’S THE SYMBOL.
RAJ THE HUSBAND WAS ALSO AFRAID BECAUSE OF PTSD & PHOBIAS. THIS COULD BE SAYING HIS FEAR HAS DIMINISHED.)
Then he turns into a human infant, naked, & I’m cradling him on my left arm holding him close, enjoying the love & Zar does two things which annoy me that are unfair. First, she tries to take the child away to take him somewhere, & I say,
(NAKED MEANS ‘OPEN – VULNERABLE – EXPOSED’ LIKE BEING ‘NAKED BEFORE THE LORD’ MEANS BEING HONEST WITH HER. THIS SHOWS A BETTER OPENING BETWEEN RAJ & YOU.)
“I’m playing with him now.”
And then, while he’s in my arms she sort of sneaks around from the left (like behind something) saying,
“Do you love Mommy? Kiss Mommy” like getting his attention again & again.
I tell her this sort of activity isn’t right. Look over there at your husband – Dave – (he’s to the left). If you were in his arms & another guy came up & said ‘kiss me, kiss me, do you love me’ see how screwed up that would be?
(THIS REPEATS THE CONFLICT BETWEEN YOUR GOD-SELF & FLESH, THE FLESH–As I think about this it appears that SHE is the one who’s insecure, as much or moreso than the baby, & that’s why she’s so greedy/jealous about him—won’t allow me to hold him. THE FLESH WAS NOT LETTING GO, I SCOLD HER ON THAT.)
After they found I don’t have a printer, the Hindus said it’s OK, they’ll do what they have to do in the morning—go out somewhere, find a printer & do their mailing. (The one guy reassures everyone twice about this.)
Then I’m busy doing things & I don’t see Zar or her baby & entourage anywhere. I am SURPRISED when I go to the MIDDLE ROOM (in my apt this would be the bedroom) & they are PACKING UP ALL MY THINGS TO TAKE AWAY WITH THEM. This is being done without asking me or saying anything. And when I walk in Zar & the guys are all talking to each other, not explaining anything to me at all.
They’re taking everything I own, everything, in this room, neatly packing it up into large boxes.
One type of item is ‘decorator pillows’ like I used to have long ago. They are bright satin, oranges, reds, they have neatly stacked them all into a box, dozens of them.
Then there’s FLAGS, also of bring orange, reds, all on blonde wooden poles – I don’t need them any more either let them have them. I explain,
“I bought them because I was going to do this publicity stunt & was going to line up the flags along the street to attract people – but I didn’t do the stunt & not going to so don’t need the flags. And I add,
