By Rasa Von Werder, January 11th, 2021




1-11-21 Journey 2 Good – Table – Sex & Photography

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What a journey! It begins on my own property, over a mountain I have traversed hundreds of times in my dreams. It’s a WOODED area with a dirt road through, the walking of which goes about 3 hours.

*(3 HOUR ROAD: This is not a ‘walk in the park,’ I am facing what takes effort, it’s not a ‘quick road’ or solution, it takes considerable time.)*

As I begin the ascent over this tall hill, I see the interlopers have multiplied. I have often seen characters or evidence of them, they have moved onto my property, & often seems they have overstepped their borders & are inhabiting mine. This time they have CHILDREN, mostly boys, these boys are trouble makers, are harassing me a bit, they seem to have some black blood. And the land these people have occupied seems a bit different, like it’s rectangles with black borders, like flat rectangles made of maybe plexi glass all over the place. I just keep moving up the mountain.

*(INTERLOPERS, BOYS, HARASSING: These are ‘on this road’ or struggle, immature, misguided people who interfere with my goal. They are I will figure later, the associates of Lover Bob.

PLEXI GLASS RECTAGLES WITH BLACK BORDERS: These are PLOTS of what I might see as greenhouse-type gizmos over ground, to get plants to germinate & grow, but the black borders say that THIS WILL NOT BE.

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It will portend the HOPES & DREAMS, PLANS of Bob & his associates for success, good jobs, money, fame in the rap world, or any other plans. Given their ignorance, lack of abilities & delusional minds, plus add to it the present recession/depression situation, all their plans will go to naught. I have seen this in numerous dreams & have known it for his associates ever since we started. They are ‘ghetto’ people {uneducated, slum dwellers or hillbillies}, but not just that, they are lowlifes, criminals, drug addicts, misguided, not virtuous, honest or righteous – 99% of them, & so, they will fail. And in this dream it shows THEY WERE AGAINST ME but their hostility has come to naught. I will fulfill my goal as the dream will portray.)*

After a while I realize I’m in a vehicle & my friend Rudy is driving. We are in a large woods, above the trees somehow, & you see the trees like big balls of leaves, beautiful, but you can’t see the road. Most are light green, there are some Autumnal colors. I look at Rudy – he doesn’t even have his hands on the wheel, I scream & I take over the wheel. He’s sitting, I’m standing, maybe in the back seat.

*(RUDY HIS HANDS NOT EVEN ON THE WHEEL: Rudy probably represents my Lover Bob. {He’s an old disabled man who loves me.} This shows that Bob is incapable, disabled or crippled, in his pursuit of our relationship. But he is here nonetheless, we are together. It’s just that I HAVE TO TAKE OVER THE WHEEL which means I have to be the DOMINANT PERSON & control the situation, which means I have to GET US TO MATRIMONY – he can’t. {Matrimony or union in a real relationship is the goal / struggle here – When we related all he did was want sex & portrayed another woman on social media as his wife.})*

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While I have taken over, I still don’t see the road. Where are we? It’s scary because if you can’t see the road, how can we traverse this mountain?

*(MOUNTAIN: Represents a PROBLEM, DILEMMA or HARDSHIP toward one’s good. Elvis had a song, “Lord, This Time You Gave Me a Mountain.”
In dreams I have crossed THIS MOUNTAIN hundreds of times means I have had this same problem or something similar many times.
Not seeing the ROAD is not seeing how to get there.)*

Finally, somehow, we get back on the road like it just appears by itself, with us on it. It seems the road appears & disappears at will, without our consent.

*(ROAD APPEARS, DISAPPEARS, NOT UNDER OUR CONTROL: Fate or destiny does not reveal itself all the time, sometimes it does.)*

But now, at the end of the journey, I recall one dangerous spot – which, when there’s a lot of rain, it floods & is impassible, because there’s the cliff to the right of it, a huge lake of water to the left, the narrow road being flooded is impassible. Will we have to turn back, the long journey a waste of time?

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*(TURN BACK: Will we have to abort having a relationship, it’s impossible to achieve?
This spot represents the small, narrow gate that one must traverse for happiness or the Kingdom of heaven – whereas the wide, easy road is the one most people take, the Broad Highway to Hell. Indeed, his earthly wife & most of his associates & relatives have taken this broad road with drugs, criminal activities, the easy way out & they are headed for failure / Hell.)*

We get to the spot, & it’s not flooded, but it’s muddy – there had been rain. We can’t go over this mud, as it might sink our car badly. I see to the right of the narrow road is the cliff & it’s dry. I tell Rudy to HOLD ON TO ME TIGHT. At first I do not feel him holding on – later I will feel him strongly. There’s no longer a car, it’s just me travelling.

*(THE CAR, NO LONGER A CAR, JUST ME, HOLD ON TIGHT: The car, our vehicle, could be the circumstances under which we saw one another, which is no more. I no longer go to the places we used to meet or the place we spent night together.

“Just me” now travelling & he MUST HOLD ON is my God Self. We have come to the most DIFFICULT PART OF THE JOURNEY TOWARD MATRIMONY. With the physical meetings GONE there is naught left but GOD & FAITH IN GOD – THE GOD WITHIN ME IN PARTICULAR. This says that at first I did not feel him holding on to God / me but now I do. In the dream he’s simply riding me like a papoose on his Mom’s back but without the papoose, his arms circled ’round me.)*

As I go on the ciff there are footholds – not many – but you see footholds that bears or goats climb onto extremely steep areas, if you don’t look down, just keep going, you’ll make it, so I keep moving. It gets completely perpendicular but I keep going.

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*(IF YOU DON’T LOOK DOWN: Keep your mind on the SPIRITUAL, not the earthly thoughts or emotions, & you can manage this journey toward good. It’s a journey of FAITH!)*

Then it gets EVEN WORSE. Rudy says it seems like the journey is going on way longer than usual – it’s true, I have never seen it drag out so long.

*(RUDY SAYS: What Rudy ‘says’ is what Bob is thinking – this separation is taking forever. It’s trying his faith, but the dreams says he’s holding onto it.)*

Now the cliff to our right not only is perpendicular but it becomes CONCAVE, indented & now what, & it is also PAINTED BLUE – all the cliffs hereafter painted blue. I say to Rudy,

“Did you know I can fly?”

I had not even thought of it before, but I recall now I have this power, there’s nothing to hold onto, I must either fly or return back, so I fly. But as I do so, from time to time, to stabilize myself, I touch the cliff, just touch it lightly, keep going.

*(DID YOU KNOW I CAN FLY? Flying is spiritual or mystical travel, it is Power. ANGELS FLY, celestial beings fly, it means traversing or migrating between dimensions, the spiritual & physical. Dead people cannot fly means those dead to the spirit cannot – that’s why they can’t go to Heaven, you have to have Spiritual Content, Spiritual Life, to fly. And so those who have no Spiritual end up in Hell, the place of limitation, torture & separation from God.)*

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Finally we get to some kind of STATION which is like two floors or more above the lake, embedded in the cliff, like a Ranger station or something. My immediate thought is the two men I see sitting behind a counter in front will be shocked to see someone coming from this side, as there is no access except by air. Those who come there arrive by boat, how they get up to the station, I have no idea, maybe a ladder? The Rangers don’t see many people, it would be occasional.

*(RANGER STATION: A place of respite, rest, a break in the struggle, created by God – a refuge God has made which few can reach, but we have. There will be REVELATION here, & God gives revelations to bring Peace to the soul.)*

The two Rangers, one on the right facing me is Caucasian, the one to my left is cocoa colored. The white one has round eyes he’s sort of rolling or looking back at the other guy. I show them by turning that on my back holding on strongly is Rudy, they see his round face. I might add that when I flew in the air, I did not feel his weight at all.

*(THE TWO RANGERS, ONE COCOA, ONE RETARDED, ROUND EYES: These have to be celestial beings, one could be a saint on earth, the round eyed one an angel or saint who is amazed that I made it here with Bob. That is part of the revelation – that we are here, Bob is with me still, I have not lost the relationship over all this time & hardship.

STATION IN THE CLIFF: For sure this is a place of God, as in the Song of Songs they speak of the cleft in the rock where a dove rests, & the great CLIFF is without a doubt, the Kingdom of God, while the lake to the left is the world, but it has grace, but is also DANGEROUS as sin can lose our soul.

This STATION cannot be reached from the side I came except by air – which means by mystical travel, & so the Angel is amazed {round eyed} that I succeeded. The fact that Bob is indeed holding onto me shows he has faith in me – he could not have made this on his own, by himself, only faith in me. His round face is a parallel to the round eyes of the angel – which is evidence that that is what the angel is amazed by.)*

Now I look downward, like the 2 flights down, to the right, & I see a man. He’s working on something at the base of the cliff facing it, he’s standing on what? A platform above the water, the water of course behind him. He’s far away but I can see he’s really handsome & I want to meet him. His profile, which I am looking at, looks like Bob, my Spiritual Husband, but in the dream I don’t know this man. And I’m thinking how do I get to meet him?

*(HANDSOME MAN BELOW I WANT TO MEET: This shows the man having arrived here BY BOAT, which is the other way, not the flying or mystical travel, but the human, perhaps logical, way of having arrived at the STATION OF GOD, the base of the cliff of God, the water being the earth, but with grace.
The fact that he’s here working is part of the revelation which brings Peace: You have not lost Bob. He is here in two ways, the way of faith, & the way of human endeavor, somehow working toward being with you. He’s at the foot of the cliff or the feet of God, doing whatever he can do to hold on, mostly HUMBLING himself. You want to meet him in the flesh, & you don’t recognize him as you’ve never seen Bob HUMBLE. He’s always been proud, haughty & selfish in the past. This is a person you don’t know.)*

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I am at a table for dinner or something, a special fete. A woman is standing at the OTHER END OF THE TABLE facing me – have no idea who she is, seemed like my earthly Mother but that doesn’t seem likely – I have NEVER dreamed of my earthly Mother except in the context of Purgatory & long ago nightmares of her torturing / killing me.

*(FEMALE ACROSS TABLE: Since it seems like my earthly mother, me trying to impress her – I was always trying to win the love of my Mom who betrayed me again & again each time, destroyed me, killed me. This then might be an ENEMY & my guess would be Ruthie, the live-in common law wife of Bob.

‘Ruthie’ lured Bob away from me with drugs – that & other worldly factors won his attention – he’s been with her for years. And so, she stood in the way of my happiness & success just as my Mom did.

The table with the white tablecloth is her temporary ‘banquet’ or ‘feast’ which means enjoyment in ‘matrimony.’ But it has a black band around the rim of the entire tablecloth, which is like 4″ wide – which means ending or funeral, this marriage WILL END, her ‘enjoyments’ over.)*

As I sit there is a column, like the decorative ‘columns’ I had built on certain corners in my house – it’s white. This table has a BLACK BAND around it on the bottom of the white tablecloth.

The column is notable in that it seems to emerge out of the corner of this table to my left & is only a foot away from where I sit – rather close. It is just like the columns in my house.

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I tell this lady about a SAUCE that I got from GORDON RAMSAY. It is so great I put it on everything – I saw him create it on one of his shows, & it is similar but different from Caesar Salad dressing, which I call Cleopatra. I brag abut Gordon saying he might be the greatest chef in the world. The lady across from me is listening, I seem to be talking to her, to impress her.

*(BRAGGING ABOUT A SAUCE FROM GORDON RAMSAY: This stumped me until I thought of SPERM. If I am speaking to Ruthie then I’m bragging to her about this man who might be the best chef in the world – it has to be Bob & I’m bragging about his sperm, that I’m using it in many recipes, putting it on everything.
This would be some sort of comprehensive use of Bob’s sperm, or saying he’s given me something I use on everything, or saying, he’s given me HIMSELF in a comprehensive, across-the-board way, body & soul, all phases & factors, he’s mine all mine.

SAUCE is an ELIXIR like ‘the Elixir of Youth,’ something that VIVIFIES, like a magical / wonderful thing that makes LIFE TASTE GOOD, makes everything pleasant, happy, positive.  It’s like the blood of life, the water of grace.  This is not a lowminded analysis of sperm, it’s meaningful & high-minded.

& your relationship has a BLACK BAND OF DEATH around it, but OUT OF IT is THIS COLUMN OF WHITE THAT IS MINE, my permanent relationship with Bob will emerge ‘out of’ or ‘following’ the end of yours with him.
Ruthie STANDING, me SITTING with my column close to me: Sitting shows relaxation, ‘sitting pretty’ or in a good place. Standing facing me is more like ‘at attention’ so Ruthie is not in the best place but paying attention to my words.
The COLUMN CLOSE is my time with Bob is COMING CLOSE as soon as her fiasco ends.
All three of these dreams today evoke the same message: Ruthie & Bob will end, Bob is clinging to me, hoping for us to be together, we are at the end of this long, impossible struggle which only God could facilitate, we’ll be together soon, maybe starting in the Spring. My refusing to have sex with him worked.)*

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I am a model posing with this man, which every time you take pictures of him he comes out great. When you see him in person he is not that impressive, I guess he’s photogenic. We’re at my house here. This model is sort of a ‘low minded’ person. He asked me to have sex but I declined.

*(THE MODEL, NOT MUCH IN PERSON BUT PHOTOGENIC, ALL IMAGES OF HIM ARE GOOD: This is Bob in the past, he was low minded, just wanted sex, you could not tell how handsome he was until images proved it – the images I took.)*

The photographer is busy & at the end of the day I asked him how many pictures we had. He said it in two increments, like 100 & then 90. He thought it was a lot – I didn’t. I wanted to take a lot more.

*(THE PHOTOGRAPHER: Must be a symbol as there’s never been a photographer besides me of Bob. This expresses my desire to have more pictures of him, in particular with him. It might just say ‘I want to be with Bob in the flesh.)*

I ask him to see the pictures, & he has left them apparently in the woods – which I felt was a bad idea, all his equipment was there. He takes a run down my hill from the upper yard to lower, a beeline, over Autumn leaves, & I run after him. He has some female with him. They pick up his equipment & pics & come back.

While we are apart – the photographer & I – I face him with a question, which I’m shy about asking. Just wanted to know, I say to him,
“No more sex?”

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I have to ask him three times as he doesn’t respond. I tell him the other guy asked me for sex but I declined. After I ask, he’s no longer a man. I see this silver slot, like a slot for mail, & out of it comes SPRIGS OF SPRING VEGETATION, small & new. But he isn’t there, I get no answer.

*(HE BECOMES A MAIL SLOT AFTER I ASK THE QUESTION, SPRING GROWTH COMES OUT OF THE SLOT: There is indeed an answer, this dream is a parallel to the long one re the journey. This dream asks WHEN will I have sex with Bob again, or WHEN will our permanent relationship, in the physical, begin? The answer is
SILVER: permanence, it comes out of the mail slot or a MESSAGE. The
SPRING GROWTH could mean one of two things or both: It will resume in the Spring, or it will resume eventually, as Spring is new beginnings. The
OTHER GUY ASKED ME FOR SEX BUT I DECLINED is when Bob was a lowlife he wanted to keep having sex, but I refused. But my refusal has led to what I wanted, what had to be, the permanent real relationship symbolized by the thick metal mail slot. I rejected his lowlife desires to find something high minded or meaningful.)*

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